Spare a thought for your waitress this Christmas - it’s not a job for the faint-hearted

[inanna]

From The Guardian:

Drunkenness, rudeness, harassment... Melissa Sigodo has seen it all during her five year restaurant career

Like many cash-strapped twentysomethings, I need to earn a living, so I work in a restaurant. I have waitressed in various places all over London, from a painfully quiet restaurant in leafy South Kensington to an eatery bustling with thrusting capitalists in Mayfair, and have seen the crème de la crème of difficult customers. My conclusion? Horrible diners fall victim to an illusion of superiority that comes from mistaking their comfortable chair for a throne.

<snip>

Working in the City I came to realise bankers do not take lunch breaks, they have lunch-day-breaks. The brokers and equity analysts arrived at 12.30pm and left around 8pm. After seven and a half hours drinking alcohol, as you can imagine, things get raucous. One evening I witnessed my colleague being asked to bare her breasts in return for extra tips. Management did not bar the two male customers who made this offensive and sexist request, purely because they continued to spend thousands of pounds on fine wine.

Another evening a regular customer came in with a group of boisterous men whose goal seemed to be to drink themselves into a coma and order copious amounts of heart attack-inducing steak. As the party left, the regular pulled me by the arm and whispered in my ear: “Your dress is killing me, I need to have you.” I gave him a grizzly look as if to say: “Get your hands off.” Then he hesitantly let go of my arm and swayed towards the exit. A few days later he came in accompanied by his wife and could barely hold eye contact with me the entire evening. It made me feel slightly like a shunned prostitute.

I can tolerate the rude or noisy but what I can’t bear are the self-important, impatient types. Arriving half an hour early, he (it’s usually a man) will shrug his coat off his shoulders - expecting me to pick it up - as if preparing to pose for a life drawing. I then have to chase him as he paces ahead to seat himself goodness knows where. Before I can even ask the reservation name, this gentleman has already requested the menu, demanded both main and desert as well as a Bombay and tonic, oh, and for the air-conditioning to be turned on and the music to be lowered please. I’m tempted to remind this man of my role in this establishment which is to welcome and seat guests and then take their orders, in that sequence. But for the sake of professionalism and upcoming rent, I nod along and play the role of mobile mannequin.

Link: http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/she-said/2014/dec/20/spare-a-thought-for-your-waitress-this-christmas-its-not-a-job-for-the-faint-hearted

[inanna]

1. From the comments section at Guardian link:

Baldbob Belling pollystyrene

20 December 2014 10:44am
Recommend
106

It's not just waiting staff. The whole concept of a 'hierarchy' of work is institutionalised in this country. If you empty bins, wait on tables or sweep roads you are viewed as a lesser being.
A job is a job. That it pays less doesn't diminish either the value (in societal, not monetary, terms) or the person carrying out the work. If this were properly recognised then the UK would be a more decent and respectful place.


^^ Sums up my thoughts completely.

[Mnemosyne]

2. As an ex- longtime waitress, very good read. Thanks inanna. nt

[inanna]

3. Former "coffee shop girl" here....

Though not quite the same as waitressing, some of the customers were obnoxious -and exhibited similar behaviours as mentioned in the OP, including drunkenness. The establishment I worked in was often a pit-stop after "last call" at the bars.

[nichomachus]

4. I always try to treat service workers with respect

They're not servants. They're people doing a damn hard job.

I used to go to a lot of business lunches with people I didn't know and I would judge a person's character by the way they treated waitstaff, bartenders, etc.

One time I was with my boss. He decided he wanted to stop for a drink. It was the bar in a nice hotel. We sat at the bar. When my boss wanted to get the bartender's attention, he would snap his fingers and shout, "Fella, Fella." I wanted to crawl under a rock -- except there were no rocks.

Unless a bar is super busy, I always ask the bartender his/her name and give them mine.

A great story about this involves GHW Bush and Bar. There is a very nice restaurant just down the street from their mansion in Kennebunkport. The story is that Bush is a great guy because one time he forgot to tip the waitress and went back the next day to givenher a tip. The truth is that he didn't forget to tip, but Bar wouldn't let him. She doesn't believe in tipping wait staff.

[mainstreetonce]

5. I find the checkout clerks

at my local supermarket exceptionally helpful.

Are they allowed to accept tips?

[inanna]

6. Not sure....

But it wouldn't hurt to ask. I know, for example, that McDonald's employees are not allowed to accept tips. Guess it depends on the policies of the business.

I think it's awesome of you to consider this, though.

[Sherman A1]

7. Probably not, but

I am sure that they appreciate any kindness and respect directed their way. Just as any of us would.

[murielm99]

8. I don't think they are,

but I give them compliments as often as possible. Sometimes I tell them they look nice.

Often, I bring my own reusable bags and help them pack things. If they suggest another way of packing the bags, I say, "Thanks. You're the expert at this."

One day, a checkout woman was being detained by a crackpot who was telling her his version of the latest conspiracy theories. She could not extricate herself to get back to her station. I asked one of the other guys to page her and get her off the hook. She was grateful.

[arikara]

9. I work at a post office

at Christmas many of the regulars give us chocolates, home baking, even in some cases face cream and such like that if they are a small manufacturing business. I heard that the couriers often get money.

You could take them some kind of a treat to show your appreciation if they can't have tips.