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Related: About this forumweissmam
(905 posts)Now that's funny, but hey its Japan
bhikkhu
(10,711 posts)I think (being older myself) leaving the best future for our kids means leaving a world with fewer people. Population growth that slows by the choice of people themselves is the very best thing.
Angst and sadness is understandable, as always seems to accompany change, but the trends of the first part of the 20th century were toward mass deprivation and universal poverty. With the resources that barely sustained 7 billion, 3 or 4 billion could all live like kings, especially given the technology we have now that replaces a great deal of human labor.
Ace Acme
(1,464 posts)The drop in population created a situation where food prices dropped, and land values dropped with them, making life easier for the survivors and opening up many opportunities for economic progress to them.
Spitfire of ATJ
(32,723 posts)Art_from_Ark
(27,247 posts)so I don't think the concept is all that Western.
Spitfire of ATJ
(32,723 posts)Art_from_Ark
(27,247 posts)"Remember, Yoko, if your husband wants to do 'H' with you, it's not to be enjoyed. Just keep reminding yourself that it's just something you have to put up with if you want a baby."
Spitfire of ATJ
(32,723 posts)Art_from_Ark
(27,247 posts)But the average Japanese mom does make it quite clear to her daughter(s) that sex is "only for reproduction".
Spitfire of ATJ
(32,723 posts)seabeyond
(110,159 posts)this is very interesting. i have read a little on this. i like hearing from the people though. thanks. will get back to it in the morning.
dsteve01
(312 posts)I always appreciate your threads, Yui.
yuiyoshida
(41,818 posts)StrayKat
(570 posts)I was surprised at the number of elderly inmates as well as the increase in violent crime committed by the elderly. Twenty percent of prisoners in Japan are over 65. Is the high crime rate among the elderly due to dementia? Is it a way of getting into a care facility in a society where fewer children are taking in their elderly parents and grandparents and nursing homes are not the norm?
Japan may be experiencing the low birthrate phenomenon at an accelerated rate, but it seems to be a global trend as nations become more affluent.
Art_from_Ark
(27,247 posts)That's the first time I've heard of that, and I live in Japan.
I imagine some of the inmates are like "Soapy" in the O'Henry story (The Cop and the Anthem), that is, trying to get into jail for "three hots and a cot" so they resort to committing petty crimes, like not paying for a drinking spree.
From age 70 on, all health care in Japan is free, so that isn't a reason. And there are nursing homes in Japan, as well as "day care" services for the elderly, but maybe they are expensive like their American counterparts.
I think some of those inmates might be in there for vehicular manslaughter, as I often read about older drivers running over pedestrians, bicyclists, etc., and if the victim dies then it's off to jail for the driver. Or maybe they have too many DWIs, which can carry a prison sentence of up to 5 years.
StrayKat
(570 posts)Vehicular manslaughter might certainly explain some of the murder and assault charges.
The BBC documentary mentions the skyrocketing rate of assault, murder and robbery, but print sources say that most of the crime is petty theft, which is more what I would expect. Loneliness and boredom seem to motivate the theft as much as poverty.
PoliticAverse
(26,366 posts)Art_from_Ark
(27,247 posts)and basically, as someone who is living in Japan, saw nothing that I would disagree with. However, I would like to make a few comments.
Yubari, the declining town mentioned early on, is located in a cold, snowy region (Hokkaido). It prospered because of the coal it was producing. Once the coal ran out, it became a typical boom-and-bust mining town, especially one in a harsh climate area. Its population is now the same as it was in 1894.
A few things that the documentary did not touch on:
Older unmarried women seem to be unfamiliar with the concept of dating. For example, if a man asks a female coworker out for a meal, her first response is likely to be "Who else is coming?". During lunch, the female employees at a company will usually sit among themselves. There seems to be an unwritten rule that men and women eat lunch separately from each other. They will sometimes go out drinking together after work, but usually only in groups and then everyone goes their separate ways afterward.
Many Japanese female university students, while technically adults (half of them, at least), still don't seem to have grown out of the "boys are icky" stage. And a guidebook for new students that I translated recently contained horror stories of dates gone wrong. "He seemed like a nice guy, but he tried to get me to join his cult." "I thought we were going to a restaurant, but he took me to the red-light district instead." It's also interesting that at least one of the local private high schools offers scholarships on the condition that the recipient agree in writing not to date anyone while the scholarship is in effect.
Japanese married couples tend not to sleep in the same bed/futon. And Japanese wives seem to be interested in sex only as a means of producing babies. Once their "baby quota" is met, they will often stop having sex with their husbands, and often even move into a different bedroom. Also, once the babies start coming, the wife/mother will likely devote her full attention to them, and essentially ignore her husband unless she wants him to take the kids off her hands for the weekend. And nearly all of the husband's paycheck goes to mama-san and the kids. So a boy growing up in such a household sees marriage like that and thinks, "Why bother getting married?"
yuiyoshida
(41,818 posts)I have heard this as well, especially the last line.
Art_from_Ark
(27,247 posts)This is one of the few things about living in Japan that really bugs the crap out of me because... Well, I guess you can fill in the rest.
yuiyoshida
(41,818 posts)It would be a long time before many Japanese would allow marriages to "foreigners" and that would solve many problems. Its just not going to happen, unfortunately.
Art_from_Ark
(27,247 posts)I know quite a few kids here whose mothers are Chinese and fathers are Japanese. It's probably easier for Chinese women to assimilate into Japanese culture, and the Chinese women get the added bonus that they can have as many kids as they want in Japan-- it's even encouraged by the Japanese government. Since their husbands are Japanese, their kids are Japanese citizens until at least the age of 20, when they usually have to decide which nationality they want to keep.
yuiyoshida
(41,818 posts)Americans, Australians...
Art_from_Ark
(27,247 posts)especially if they are highly educated and are from advanced countries. And mixed race Caucasian-Japanese kids are Japanese citizens until at least the age of 20. However, there still seems to be a lot of opposition to marriages to South Asians, Africans, Southeast Asians, etc., particularly if the wife is Japanese.
yuiyoshida
(41,818 posts)Arigatou, Ark San! Honto desu!
Art_from_Ark
(27,247 posts)I teach English to Chinese-Japanese kids. In one lesson, I was teaching them about names of family members. In their textbook, there was a picture of an old man and the word "Grandfather" underneath. One of the girls started doodling in her textbook (like they all do), but soon announced "Grandpa is now a bunny girl!" I thought that she meant that Grandpa had been turned into a little rabbit, but "bunny girl" meant, well, *Playboy* bunny girl, complete with fishnet stockings, and the artwork was superb! My jaw just dropped to the floor. But at the same time, I couldn't help laughing at the amazing transformation that Grandpa had undergone!
yuiyoshida
(41,818 posts)I would love to see that... (hentai!)
Art_from_Ark
(27,247 posts)It was truly an amazing transformation. That girl (and she's just in grade school) has unbelievable artistic talent. I was still drawing stick figures at that age.
Art_from_Ark
(27,247 posts)Japanese women especially usually refer to it simply as "H". And they will also refer to sex as "H".
My student's drawing probably wouldn't be considered "hentai" in the normal sense because she did not draw anything that couldn't be shown on TV. But it was still a bit shocking to see it come from the pencil of an elementary school girl. But funny and amazing at the same time.
yuiyoshida
(41,818 posts)and people tend to laugh about it. Anyway, when they say "H"...is there a way they pronounce it? Another phrase
I learned was "Sukebe Otoko" and of course "ecchi". My favorite lately has been: "chotto puraibashii , gomen nasai"
Nihongo ga suki desu demo furansugo wa kirai desu
Art_from_Ark
(27,247 posts)Last edited Thu Nov 21, 2013, 02:45 AM - Edit history (3)
"Sukebe Otoko" is generally shortened to "sukebe", and seems to refer to any man over 40 who is still interested in intimate relations with a woman (including his wife). Of course, it's only used by women.
I have not heard "Chotto puraibashii, gomen nasai", but I looked it up and it seems to mean "Sorry, but you're (or I'm, depending on the context) asking a rather personal question!"
yuiyoshida
(41,818 posts)Thanks for the clarification! Yay!
tomm2thumbs
(13,297 posts)always interested in Japan as I used to work for a Japanese company and it was sooooo very traditional on one hand, and yet striving to be new and open on the other
yuiyoshida
(41,818 posts)fasttense
(17,301 posts)It's documented in most any culture. People have to wait longer to accumulate enough wealth to support a family. Children cost a lot of money to raise, even out of wedlock children. They don't raise themselves despite what the Christian Quiver-full crazies want you to believe.
I really believe if they had a roaring economy there would be no problems. This crap about their debt is silly. Much like most capitalist societies, Japan's debt is due to a bad economy.