Why is it so hard for people to RSVP to a kid's birthday party?

[RiffRandell]

I find that so rude. I know people are busy, but my daughter had her birthday party this weekend and almost half the class didn't RSVP. They didn't show, so at least I didn't over buy on the cupcakes and gift bags, but is it that time consuming to call or send an email saying you can't come?

Ironically, 2 parents that didn't RSVP invited her to their birthday parties this weekend and the following one. I took the high road and responded---she can't attend either because we have company in town.

[Kali]

1. nobody has any manners anymore

they don't RSVP to ANYTHING

and if they send out invites, they don't clarify WHO in your house is invited!!! you show up sans kids for something and they want to know where they are, or YOU have to be the uncouth person to call and ask

or it is for a kid event and you drop them off - then you get the why didn't you stay? aaarrrggghhhh

because you couldn't even add "and family" to the fucking invite, moron!

[Kaleva]

2. My ex would use me as an excuse for her no-shows.

She would tell her friends that she was sure to show up for an invite but often when the time came, she decided not to go. To cover herself, she'd blame it on me. Like telling one friend of hers that I was an ass and took the vehicle and thus she had no way of getting there. I was actually in the living room that evening watching tv and had no plans to go anywhere.

[pipi_k]

3. wow that sucks...

did you ever spill the beans to these friends?

[benld74]

4. The wife and I LOATHE those not doing their RSVP duties,

We have had parties at the house, movie theaters, etc, AND not even had 25% of those invited RSVP! People have no manners, class whatever you wish to call it.
ONLY family does the RSVP, and they come the farthest!

ITs bad.

[rug]

5. It's important to respond.

Elementary school kids are very vulnerable when it comes to parties.

One of the saddest things I saw was at a food court in the mall. A young father was there with his daughter who was around 8. I don't know if he was a single father or just a separated dad trying to do something good for his daughter on her birthday.

The two of them were sitting at one of the food court tables which was decorated, along with three other tables. The two sat there quietly talking for a while and then the pizza parlor brought over four pies. No one else was there.

On our way out my daughter walked over to the girl and said she liked her dress. The girl gave her a slice of pizza and we left.

It was heartbreaking. Always answer an invitation. And if you don't go, get a card.

[RiffRandell]

6. That is so sad. n/t

[Kaleva]

7. That is a very sad story. Glad to here though that your daughter complimented her.

[rug]

8. It goes through my mind every time I plan something for them.

[ceile]

11. oh my gosh.

that's makes my heart hurt. poor girl...

[Kali]

14. oh!

[geardaddy]

9. That's rude.

Plain and simple.

[sharp_stick]

10. The kids in my daughters school

have all been pretty good. The cards go out with RSVP before a certain date or you're assumed to be a no. It makes it a lot cheaper so you aren't buying a bunch of extra stuff. You're right though, it takes no effort to fire off an email.

Most of the parents and her school make it a practice only to invite the friends so at least you aren't pressured into inviting the entire class, we aren't even allowed to hand out party invitations in class.

I don't mind schlepping the kids off to a friends house for a couple of hours but if it's somebody they barely know it's not really worth it and they don't have that much fun.

On her last birthday party only 2 of the 16 invites didn't RSVP at all. One of them showed up anyway, I wanted to be a hard-ass and send her little butt packing but my wife relented because she was cute as hell.... Cute as hell always wins it just a'int fair.

[GermanDem]

12. Where I live (Oklahoma)

the custom now seems to be that you only RSVP if you come, but don't if if you can't come. The first few times I was confused, but then I figured it out. Now that the kids are older, no one RSVP's, they all just tell my daughters, and show up (or not). but I agree with everyone, it shouldn't be too hard to just call either way!

What really irks me though is when my kids make arrangements to meet other kids (e.g. at the movie theater), and the other kids show up without money, and then I am stuck footing the bill for the ticket. And once no one showed up to pick up one of the girls after the movie was over, so I had to drive her home (at the other end of town). That really bugged me to no end! How irresponsible of the parents!

[RiffRandell]

13. That is bad.

I always send my son with money, but I feel if I invite a friend to the movies, I plan on paying for them. But with the popcorn/candy/drinks, it gets quite expensive. I do sneak in waters as my kids don't like soda. I'm not cheap, but there's no way in hell I'm paying 5 bucks for a bottled water.

[1gobluedem]

15. It's out of control

I do a lot of events for my job. We send invitations with definite RSVP dates and often will continue to get RSVPs (from those who bother) right up to an hour before the event. Apparently people think I have a wand that will instantly give us more room, more seating, and more food. It's crazy.

Once a woman who hadn't RSVPed showed up to the event, saying she didn't know she needed to respond. She was HOLDING the invitation that had the RSVP date on the front and back!

Nuts.

I also hate it when people RSVP and don't come; you planned for them, and then you have extra food and drink. A waste. Especially for a work event.

[NewJeffCT]

16. I think I've only had one non RSVP to several years

of birthday party invites for my daughter. I've had a few people RSVP after the date I had requested an RSVP by, though.

So, it's not everywhere that people don't respond.