My step-daughter and son-in-law are coming to visit in a couple of weeks. And so are his Trumpster

[Aristus]

parents.

Ugh.

They're one of the reasons we left our church; them and the 81% Trump supporters statistics say attended the church with us.

Mrs. Aristus and I have already resolved to avoid any political discussions. My son-in-law (not a Trumpanzee, thank God) warned us, however, that his parents love to bait non-Trumpers to provoke a reaction. It takes a Trumpster to be rude enough to insult and offend one's hosts, but we have decided to just leave the room if they start something.

The things one does for family...

[RockRaven]

1. "If you want to talk politics..."

"you can do so down at the Holiday Inn"

[DRoseDARs]

13. ...*puts in ear plugs*... "...you'll need to be louder than these 2 airhorns..."

That'll put a stop to it right quick. Might even make them leave to go stay at a Holiday Inn instead.

[Downtown Hound]

2. My finances family are Trumpers

When we go to their house, I behave myself and don't talk politics. If they come to our house, I behave myself for as long as they do. But if you come under my roof and try and bait me, it's on like Donkey Kong. I refuse to play nice if they won't, especially in my own house.

[Rhiannon12866]

3. I have a friend, who when her RW mother-in-law visited, set the TV so it didn't go to FOX News

Don't know if that helps, but it's a suggestion. Good luck...

[Aristus]

4. We probably won't be watching much TV.

But I've heard there's a way to block out unwanted channels. I'll have to figure out how to do that with the FOX channel before they arrive.

I appreciate the suggestion. Thanks.

[Rhiannon12866]

5. I figured that might help unpleasant topics coming up

And you could just say that you don't get that channel. I guess my friend left her MIL on her own quite a bit.

[BigmanPigman]

11. Here's how you do it. A DUer posted it last night.

https://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=view_post&forum=1002&pid=10623374

[Rhiannon12866]

14. OMG! That is just brilliant! Thanks!

I have changed channels to get away from FOX News, turned on MSNBC at my auto dealership, in a hospital waiting room, and just lately complained at my dentist's office. I know my dentist - and her assistant - well, they are both fellow Democrats, so you can imagine my surprise when I walked in and found FOX News on the TV. So of course I asked what was going on, turns out a patient had "asked" for it. But it never dawned on me to make it inaccessible! I just may try that!

[BigmanPigman]

15. I know!

I never would have been able to figure that out.

[Rhiannon12866]

16. Now I just have to figure out which channel that is, LOL

If you remember, the first debate of the last election took place on FOX News. I have a friend who knows nothing about politics (I once sat down and explained to her all about who her senators and congressperson were *sigh*) and she called me to ask what channel that debate was on. And it took me forever, going through the channels, to find the damn thing! The only time I've seen it is when MSNBC shows clips - which is way too often.

[sawasigndc]

44. Awesome. I just found one of these shirts: "Fox News Lies".

So good. Found these recently. Awesome. Got one for my brother too.

https://weprotectthetruth.com

[Rhiannon12866]

47. Great idea! Do I dare get one for my brother??

He does have a birthday coming up...

[mnhtnbb]

17. In the late 90's my husband's sister and her husband came to visit us.

The brother-in-law asked me for a radio to use in their guest room so he could listen to Rush Limbaugh, which presented a really serious predicament
for me. Be the gracious hostess and give him one? Or tell him to go listen in his car? I ended up giving him a radio to use in their guest room.

During the Obama years, my husband became less inclined to visit these relatives even though after we moved to North Carolina we were closer to them (they live in Georgia). They were outrageously racist and became Trumpsters.

Now I'm in the middle of a divorce. One bright side there, I will no longer have to endure any kind of family gathering with them.

[gibraltar72]

41. Parental controls.

[MuseRider]

31. I did that to my brother.

He lived with us for way too long back during Bush** who he loved and his other main guy was Bill O'Reilly. I told him there was one room he was allowed to watch that crap in. It was comfortable but away from us but I kept getting up in the morning and he had been back in the rooms and turned every TV to Fox. He is an alcoholic/addict and there was no way to convince him he was doing anything but enlightening us. I blocked Fox on every channel then I blocked all his stupid old sports stations. He finally moved away. If I had only known it would be that easy and he did it without hitting me again. He was scary but I am here to tell whoever, block that channel and they will go to a hotel and you will be free.

[sawasigndc]

45. Another option is to put this movie on loop

http://www.thebrainwashingofmydad.com

[MuseRider]

46. Cool!

[yonder]

6. First of all, good luck

In my case, I don't have much tolerance for button pushers probably because I'm not that light on my feet.

When they try to set the hook, stay calm and focused. Humor them without being condescending by asking questions. Respond to their questions with a question of your own, keeping them on their heels.

You mentioned church. I'll assume a Christian church. When pressed, ask them how Jesus Christ might respond to any modern situation, and upon their answer, ask if they see a contradiction. If they're trumpers, there WILL be a contradiction.

Don't get defensive. If that fails, do not get angry. If that fails grab a drink. A big one.

If that fails, go to the drawer and pull out that baggie of parsley or facsimile thereof (which you cleverly hid earlier) and proceed to roll up a big hooter with a paper towel. Maybe that will shake things up enough for a laugh. I've never tried this last one so you're on your own.

Seriously, stay calm, breathe, try and have fun and most of all, good luck!

[drray23]

7. Your house, your rules.

Same goes in my house. It's basic decency to behave when being a guest st somebody's place. If they can't do that, the door is open.

[Vestigial_Sister]

8. Just hang...

trump toilet paper in each bathroom and then act innocent.

[rpannier]

9. My Aunt hosts the Christmas Dinner

She's rather conservative, but she has a rule, "If you wanna talk politics go outside."
Winters in Cordova, IL, with the wind whipping off the Mississippi River are very unpleasant.
It's quite effective and she has pitched people out

[edbermac]

10. Tell them Trump violated the 11th Commandment.

Thou Shalt Not PussyGrab Stormy.

[BigmanPigman]

12. I'd have to have a lot of Xanax on hand

and probably wash them down with whiskey (I am half joking).

[zanana1]

18. Saying nothing to a taunt...

Drives them crazy. I've tried it; it works.

[Fresh_Start]

19. Make sure to offer your guests daily newspapers of your choice

its important to start the day with a coffee and news

[MrScorpio]

20. Ignore every provocation and respond with silence...

Leaving the room is good... Playing music and dancing and drinking is better.

Change the subject to something that they're interested in.

They want to upset you, just remember that you're the one win control. Never give them what they want. That way, it no longer becomes fun for them.

Destroy their joy.

[Paladin]

21. I ignored the far right-wing taunts of my late father-in-law.

I did it for my wife, it wasn't easy, but it was probably the correct thing to do. I don't mourn his being dead, and I never will.

[Fla Dem]

22. Ignore their attempts to bait you into an argument. It frustrates them.

I find smiling sweetly and then turning my head to talk to someone else irritates them to no end. They really do want to get into it with you and are frustrated when you treat them like an annoying child. Which of course they are.

[Leith]

23. I'm Going to Part from Everyone Here

But I would not ignore an intentional provocation or dig. I would turn to the offender and say something like "Never in my life would I dream of being a guest at someone's house and insult the host like that!"

I wouldn't be nasty or angry. I would just say it and stare at the offender. If they remain defiant, I would get up and leave the room. If anyone comes to find me, I would say (and make sure they hear it) that guests should be polite. They can straighten up or leave.

I was a real mouse in my younger days. I love being more outspoken now.

[Aristus]

24. That's what I would do if I were on my own.

My wife doesn't want to make a ruckus, and she's as anti-Trump as anyone I know.

Plus, I don't want to embarrass my son-in-law, who is the sweetest, nicest guy in the world (he doesn't deserve those parents, that's for sure), and I definitely don't want to light up the room when my grandkids are there.

So Mrs. Aristus and I agreed to a low-key approach.

But I still like your suggestion...

[brewens]

26. Parent lock FOX "News". If they bitch, grownups control what is on in your house! n/t

[samnsara]

27. my sis baits all the time....trump has divided many families.

[Girard442]

28. '"Scuse me mom and dad. I want to bring some guests for a two-week visit."

"At times during the visit I'm pretty sure they'll be mean and rude and insulting but I want you to be nice to them."

Seems like something's wrong with this picture.

[sdfernando]

29. Are they stayinig with you?

If so why not decorate their room with plenty of pictures of Hillary, Obama, Michelle, Bill, and just for kicks...Jimmy!

[Siwsan]

30. I'd memorize some casual conversational phrases in Spanish

If they start talking politics, then I'd resort to the language switch.

[left-of-center2012]

32. If you know they intend to 'bait ' you ...

I would not allow their visit.

Period.

[Girard442]

33. I'd have to agree. Two weeks is a loooooong time.

[left-of-center2012]

34. 2 minutes is a long time with Trumpers

[Crutchez_CuiBono]

38. They are uncivilized.

I'd have said no to begin with and point out the divisive political dialog. It's on them, not you. Fuck these awful "baiting" people. Who does that?

[VMA131Marine]

35. Easy solution that so-called conservatives should respect

"My house, my rules! There's the door!"

[madamesilverspurs]

36. And I lived to tell the tale.

My parents came to visit a number of years ago. At the time, I was sharing a house with some liberal-minded friends. Before offering the use of the guest room I made sure the housemates were aware of Dad’s outspoken republican proclivities; they said the visit would be okay as long as they could remind him of whose house it was.

One afternoon Dad headed for the stereo in the living room and asked how to turn on the radio, following that with “It’s almost time for Limbaugh.” He wasn’t happy when I told him that we had a house rule that didn’t permit listening to Limbaugh. He glared at me and said, “I remind you that I am your father!” I smiled and told him, “And I’ve waited my whole life to tell you that as long as you’re under my roof you’ll abide by my rules.”

He walked out the door and got into his car, parked streetside, turned on his radio and cranked it to full volume. The neighbors were not pleased, but the housemates had a good chuckle.



.

[Aristus]

39. I hope he drained his battery...

[LastLiberal in PalmSprings]

37. My sympathies. My sister-in-law has political Tourette's Syndrome.

She is prone to occasional outbursts of anti-liberal exclamations.

When we met I told her I was never going to talk politics with her because our familial relationship was more important than being right. (Correct right, not Right right.)

I also told her right up front that politically I was 180 degrees from her. "If I don't respond to something you say, don't interpret my silence as agreement."

My wife and I had to train ourselves to be silent in the face of the most outrageous of statements -- "Listen to Alex Jones, he'll give you the truth!" Once we realized that her attacks only had the power we gave them -- and were only words, after all -- we practiced a process we call "being the Fog." If you think of political discourse as a tennis game, there's an energy that's created during back-and-forth volleys. If you imagine your opponent hitting the ball into a fog and it not returning, however, after about three volleys they'll get a puzzled look on their face and walk away. The same strategy works with a winger. Three unreturned verbal volleys and they get bored and change the topic or leave.

Works like a charm.

Another thing that has helped us has been to view my sister-in-law as a person who is addicted to the adrenaline that is released when she's carping about liberals, Obama, and the Clintons. Challenging her on any of her absurd statements is only increasing her fight-or-flight reaction, and even more adrenaline gets released in her blood system. Viewing her condition as a disease for which the only cure is empathy -- she has to feel like those she attacks -- helps to put our relationship into perspective. Just as you wouldn't offer a drug addict heroin, we don't offer her, an adrenaline addict, a fix of her drug of choice by giving her anything to react to. That's a bit convoluted, but it helped me understand my own need to argue about meaningless things, and has given me a lot more serenity in my life.

[sharedvalues]

43. Here's what works for me. "You're a sucker. I feel bad for you. Suckered by billionaires"

It's amazing how effective this is.

"You're a sucker. Suckered by billionaires who lied to you to get you to vote for cutting their taxes. I feel bad for you. " (sad head shake)

If they argue you can drop one extra line:
"There is one party of billionaires: the GOP. Just look at healthcare. Obama tried to increase healthcare for everyone. The first thing the GOP did when they got into office was try to cut healthcare for everyone so they could cut taxes on the rich."

It's amazingly effective. 99% of the time, they get redfaced and angry. Then when you talk to them two months later they are extremely chastened.

[mercuryblues]

40. Your wife

needs to tell your step daughter to remind her in-laws whose house they will be guests at. Full stop> You should not be told that you will have to shut up when baited.

If they want to bait you, they have no respect for you and everything you are offering them. They will be biting the hand that feeds them.

I get the not bring up politics to keep the peace. But it takes 2 to abide by that bit of decorum and if they want to break the rules, all bets are off.

If they bait just say "grab them by the *" is acceptable behavior to you both of you.

[gibraltar72]

42. As my years grow short

It's funny how little time I have to mollycoddle hateful right wing people. It is not good for blood pressure or stomachs. Everyone has to choose what is important to them. But having assholes continue to talk to me is not all that important to me. I won't be uncomfortable in my own home. I have noticed RWNJs really could give a crap about anyone elses feelings. I seldom bring up politics first but once poked I give no quarter.

[Aristus]

48. if it helps, I don't have any respect for them, either.

They are ultra-conservative 'Christians'. The mother quit her job and announced that 'God wanted her to be a painter'. Nice way to avoid having to earn a living. The father works as a security guard. But only when he feels like it.

We used to give my step-daughter and her husband money to help them get by, only to discover they were forwrding it on to his parents. That's Republican welfare for you.

My son-in-law's sister is another religious fanatic. She practically celebrated when the Iraq War started. She thought it was the beginning of the 'End Times', and swore that if she had to sacrifice her own children on the altar of war, she would. Jesus!

I don't know how my son-in-law managed to retain his sanity in a family like that, but I'm glad he did; he and I have a good relationship.