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Related: Culture Forums, Support ForumsA serious post, but I think okay for the lounge.
I was reading a news story on CNN about one of the shooting victims out in Illinois that was killed when a guy who was getting fired couldn't handle it and started shooting people.
This victim's name was Josh and after he was shot he had enough presence about him to text his wife. He told her that he loved her. Those are some great last words- as good as any ever uttered I think.
Right before I read this story, I was reading a book by a guy named Frank Ostaseski called The Five Invitations. Frank and a group of colleagues opened up the Zen Hospice Project in California back in 1987. While Frank is a Buddhist, the Zen Hospice Project respects everyone's religious beliefs or non-beliefs.
But Frank does draw on Buddhist teachings for his book. In the section that I had just read before going to check the news at CNN he wrote of the wood block and mallet used to call monks to meditation at Zen monasteries. Inscribed in the wood block is a message that reads:
Be aware of the Great Matter of Birth and Death
Life passes swiftly,
Wake up, Wake up!
Do not waste this life.
mercuryblues
(14,521 posts)fiancé asked him why we always say I love you when leaving the house or hanging up the phone. I explained to her that you never know if you will ever see that person again. Even if we are mad as hell at them, I always want the last words they hear from me is I love you.
Moostache
(9,895 posts)I had a childhood experience where my best friend was run over and killed in a sledding accident. He came down the hill, over a snowbank and into the path of a car that never had a chance to see him or stop. I was only 9 years old, but it stayed with me because of the trauma. For weeks afterward, I was convinced I would see him at school or on the playground but he wouldn't talk to me. I was quite confused about it, and even to this day those hallucinations feel REAL...like he was actually there even though he was not.
After a month or so I had discussed it with my mom and our parish priest (I was raised in the Catholic Church, and despite their well-earned reputation for less than stellar priests, ours was an honorable man of faith and compassion). The priest had administered the last rites to my friend the night of the accident in the hospital. He shared with me that Marc was gone from us, but that his life's meaning was in the impact he had on those around him - his family and friends, and that his legacy would be what that impact rippled into the world, like a pebble into the lake. I have never forgotten Marc, though these events are nearly 40 years ago now.
Since I never got to say goodbye in that case, one of the things I do everyday with my own children is say "I love you and have a great day". It has gotten harder with my kids leaving the house earlier than me, but I say it to them before bed in those cases. My wife and I have always done the same before going to sleep as well. It is important to remember those around us who are integral to ourselves and to share with them that they are meaningful and important to us. We never know when or how the last time will see each other comes...but we can be sure to extend our impact into their lives and to remember those we have lost along the way.
I lost my friend when I was 9 years old, but his impact ripples out still and as long as I live, it will always do so.
vlyons
(10,252 posts)As a Buddhist, I am familiar with the 4 thoughts that turn the mind towards the path of enlightenment.
A human life is very rare and very precious. We could have been born as a sardine, a black fly, or any other species. But we lucked out and were born as humans. Only humans have the opportunity to understand how the mind works, tame our minds, and achieve enlightenment. We are going to die, but we don't know the day or the hour of our death. Shall we chase spend our life chasing after impermanent things like money, power, and fame? Or shall we spend some time learning how to tame our mind and achieve the joy of enlightenment? When we die, the only thing that we take with us is our mind. What kind of mind shall I take into the next life? An agry mind? A confused mind? Or a mind that is peaceful and tranquil?
Ohiogal
(31,887 posts)To my hubby whenever we end a phone conversation as well.
femmocrat
(28,394 posts)We have been married 50 1/2 years!
California_Republic
(1,826 posts)Fla Dem
(23,563 posts)femmocrat
(28,394 posts)SallyHemmings
(1,819 posts)This is our second marriage.
He is a widower. His wife died quietly in her sleep, unexpectedly. They were childhood sweethearts and together 44 years.
Between us, we have four adult children and seven grand babies.
They know we love them and each other because we say it.
Love is a blessing.
llmart
(15,531 posts)That inscription is beautiful also. One can say so much in so few words.
Lochloosa
(16,057 posts)Harker
(13,956 posts)There's more to life than cats, dogs, and one liners.
Not that there's anything wrong with those.
jmbar2
(4,859 posts)Just added it to my "buy" list.
Tobin S.
(10,418 posts)I think it's the only book Ostaseski has ever written, but I'm not sure of that. But it if it is, he packed more meaning and knowledge into one book than other authors with many titles to their credit.
TNNurse
(6,924 posts)The first year we got married, I saw a story in the paper from the UP in Michigan. Several men were walking to work together across an ice bridge that winter. One remembered he had not kissed his wife goodbye and turned back to do that. The others continued, the bridge fell and they all died. I told my husband that remembering to kiss your wife goodbye could save your life. We never get in a vehicle and leave each other without a brief kiss goodbye.
smirkymonkey
(63,221 posts)about how precious life is and appreciation for our loved ones. I always say "I love you" when I speak to my family members on the phone or even when I email or text them. I may be a bit morbid but I am always aware of the fact that whenever we get together it might be for the last time for any of us.