I lost my best friend on Sunday.
I don't even know where to begin. I've been in a fog. I unexpectedly lost my friend/fiance to sudden heart failure. Rick was my first love and most likely my last. We met when we were 18 on our first day of college. We were together for the next 3-4 years until graduation. We realized that we were just too young and parted ways. We always got along, but when you're too young to settle down, you're too young. He went his way and I went mine, both of us very happily married to other people. In fact, Rick and his wife even came to my wedding in 1984.
Fast forward to 2012 and Facebook. I can't even remember who friended who, but we began communicating again. By that time, my husband, Chuck, was confined to a nursing home from the ravages of having had Type I Diabetes for 45 years and had developed vascular dementia. Rick's wife was dying from ALS which she was diagnosed with in 2007. In a horrible coincidence, I lost my dad to ALS in 2000, so I knew something about the daily challenges he was going through. We Facebooked each other occasionally, but we were both so busy it wasn't too often. I always let him know if he needed to speak to someone who knew what he was going through, I was there. His wife passed away in her own home with Rick taking care of her every day she was sick. She was the Director of all of the State of Michigan mental health & geriatric programs under Governor Jennifer Granholm, so Rick was able to quit his job to care for her. Most people die within 18 month from their diagnosis; Irene lived for 6 years, which is a testament to Rick's devotion to her. I didn't have the same good fortune and had to work full-time.
When my husband passed away in 2014, Rick was one of the first people to contact me. He was one of the few people who knew what it was like to lose the person you thought you were going to spend the rest of your life with. Facebook turned to phone calls to visits (we lived about 65 miles from each other) to me moving to be near him. The love, affection, and friendship we've always felt for each other was rekindled and the past 4 years have been wonderful. We talked about getting married, but let's face it, we were both pretty set in our ways and it was good to have our own space, even though we were together almost every day. The days we weren't together, we'd call each other up just to talk. He was a consumer protection lobbyist who wrote Michigan's Lemon Law, cemetery regulations, and his favorite fight, keeping price tags on individual items in stores. His favorite memory was making Michelle Engler (Governor John Engler's wife) angry at Christmas time because she had to remove the price tags off of all of her kid's Christmas presents, lol. It was a testament to Rick's skill that he managed to beat back the bill to eliminate the pricing for years. The bill finally passed the next legislative session after Rick retired.
So I've had a shitty week. Now I'm dealing with the legalities of his death when I have no legal standing. He had no children. He has three sisters who live from 5-50 miles from him that he hasn't seen in three years. When the hospital contacted his sister, she told the doctor that Rick told them I had medical power of attorney, but we couldn't find paperwork. So, I couldn't make any decisions for him. but he died in the ER. His best friend, Dave, who he happened to meet two hours before me way back when, has been a constant in his life. He found Rick's will and pre-arranged burial policy. Dave and I met with the funeral home, made the arrangements, and I paid the balance that his insurance didn't cover. None of his sisters showed up. The will is a Legal Zoom type document that he signed at home with two witnesses in 2018. He never told me about it. His will stunned me. Not only did he leave his house and all of it's contents to me, I'm the beneficiary of his 401K. I'm also named executor. It's about half a million dollars. I knew he was comfortable, but I didn't expect this. I don't know if any of his sisters will try to contest it or not. He was closest to his eldest sister who lives the farthest away and he spoke with her frequently on the phone., but it's his youngest sister I'm concerned about. The only time she called him was when she needed money. He would be so angry if she got anything. She cleaned out their parents before they died, so there's some hard feelings there. I'm seeing an estate attorney on Monday. I don't know what to think about all of this, but I also want to follow Rick's wishes and will fight to honor them.
So, I'm grieving. Thank you to all who managed to get through this. DU is my home, too.
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Rick's estate and that his wishes are honored by his family members. 
God bless.
Deepest condolences. I went through this with my husband 9 years ago. You'll get through this. But right now, let yourself feel what you're feeling. Don't deny your emotions. And don't forget to take care of yourself...it's easy to miss meals.
But please follow Tom's advice. The promise of "found money" tends to bring out the worst in people. I guarantee that younger sister will cause problems.
sharing such a beautiful love story with your DU family. It was wonderful that you and Rick had a second chapter together after you each lost a beloved spouse. Wishing you strength and healing.
For your dear Rick.
Sending big hugs. You are loved and very appreciated here.
help to bring you peace and comfort. 
Rick sounds like he was a wonderful, good man and the story of your lives touched me. Thank you for sharing it.
Wishing you peace and comfort as you navigate this difficult time.
My dad suddenly died 5 weeks ago and I am a wreck without having to deal with financial and legal stuff. I hope you are stronger than I am. 
Do not forget to take care of yourself physically too.
It must be devastating.
Wishing you strength and healing.
Husband of 46+ years, March, cardiac arrest. Alive then not alive in seconds.
It's unimaginable when it comes to your 'house'.
Prayerful intercession for you going up.
Much 💛 and a
I hope that in time, the memory of your years together brings you more comfort than grief.
Scaring myself at times, I don't feature losing it.
I remind myself that there are others worldwide that may be experiencing more horrendous tragedy and suffering.
I am thankful for your thoughtful uplifting words
and for my DU family.
💛
Rick sounds like he was an incredibly wonderful man. And we all know that you are an incredibly wonderful woman, so it absolutely makes sense that you found each other again after all of these years.
When I lost both of my parents, five months apart, I did not know what to do with myself. And I finally learned that I had to be kind to my soul. And that is the advice I would give to you. Be kind to yourself, and take care of yourself. And know that we are all here for you.
My heartfelt sympathy to you, catbyte! Final separation from loved ones is hard when it happens, and especially when the loss comes quickly. Prayers and wishes for you while you grieve.
I hope this does not sound insensitive, but please visit the DU Bereavement group. They are wonderful helpers, having all experienced losses themselves.
Take care of yourself, and know that your DU family are keeping you in our thoughts.
and it emotionally devastated me for a time and put me on a completely different path.
Fight for what you know is right. Keep yourself strong.
We at DU are always here.
I hope that the sisters don't contest the will. Sounds to me like he really wanted you to have his estate because you loved each other so deeply.
I don't know what to say.
This will be a hard thing to get through, but I have no doubts that you'll be able to handle.
All the best to you dear!
All I've got is
I truly am. You have my deepest condolences. I can't imagine what you must be going through. Please check in with us and let us know how you are doing.
Sending you lots of hugs as you cope with his sudden absence in your life.
and probably for a good while on. So very sorry for your loss. Wishing you the best in the days ahead, and hoping Rick's wishes are fulfilled.
...and I hope you won't find yourself in a fight with his family. I wish you strength and that the memories and bond you and Rick shared will buoy you through whatever comes.
I hope you're able to find peace in your memories.
Much LOVE to you. May PEACE be with you.
Take care of yourself.
I know the words of sorry & sympathy are not enough. Thank you for sharing your beautiful love story. Sending you ❤️ & strength during this trying time. Stand strong & do what you feel is best. After all Rick knew you were the one to handle everything. What an honor. Please take care of yourself & seek help when needed.
Wishing you the best.
Strength and peace to you
I am so very sorry for your loss.
I am thankful that you and Rick found each other again. His trust in you must have been immense to leave you as executor and heir, and I am sure he did so with an honest heart. He knew you loved him and would do your best to do right by him.
You have been put into a very difficult spot: grieving (as you must) and trying to understand why he left so much to you, with a family that may likely cause trouble.
I hope for the very best for you. I know you are smart - been on DU a long time, and you have always made me think. Do your best to fight for what Rick wanted, even when it hurts. I did that for my youngest sister, and the wounds are still there with my family. But my promises to her (and my integrity) were never really up for negotiation.
Hoping for peace and strength for you as you navigate this difficult situation. Sending you many virtual s