Why do people assume I work in the stores I visit?

[Cirque du So-What]

An example from yesterday: I’m in a hardware store and a woman comes up to me with a bottle of caustic drain cleaner.

‘Will this harm my plastic pipes,’ she asks me.

I reply, ‘well, it comes in a plastic bottle...sooo...’

She pivots and strides away in a huff. I guess I’m not cut out for customer service, so I fired myself.

[we can do it]

1. It happens to me all the time. And I get stopped and asked for directions all the time.

[Mike Nelson]

2. I think...

... it must be because you look nice, friendly, and helpful!

[Cirque du So-What]

7. Yeah. I gotta work on that

I’ll go for imposing and unapproachable, which isn’t that much of a stretch.

[ret5hd]

3. Fired yourself??? Shoulda given yourself a promotion. Did you get an exit interview?

[Cirque du So-What]

5. I totally owned the exit interview

IOW, I informed HR they were enablers of satan.

[TEB]

4. I understand

One time I was pumping gas at a sheetz market and a elderly woman next to me rolled down her window and told me to fill her up.

[33taw]

14. Did you help her?

[TEB]

23. Yes I did she was from Jersey

[33taw]

28. Cool, thank you.

[MaryMagdaline]

29. Awwww sweet

[Cirque du So-What]

19. I think New Jersey prohibits pumping your own gas

but it’s been awhile since I’ve been there. A woman asked me to pump her gas in Oregon, another state where you couldn’t pump your own gas. Evil dickweed that I am, I briefly considered taking her money.

Just kidding.

[TEB]

24. Yes she was from Jersey

I helped her out

[eppur_se_muova]

6. Maybe you should quit wearing a name tag. nt

[Cirque du So-What]

8. In my younger days, I bought a used shirt from a uniform shop

It was from a Bakery named Holsum. The previous owner’s name was Dick.

[In_The_Wind]

20. Nice shirt.

[ret5hd]

22. Them: "Can you help me..." You (pointing to name): "This isn't my name, it's a descriptive term."

[Sherman A1]

9. Happens to me from time to time

But then I did work Retail for 43 years.

[dawg day]

10. You must look like you know things!

[Cirque du So-What]

12. If I linger in an aisle for more than a few seconds

it’s likely due to cluelessness. My motto is get in, get yer shit, GTFO.

[mopinko]

11. are you wearing the wrong colored shirts?

red in target?
blue in lowes?

[Cirque du So-What]

15. Yep, that's happened

Maybe I’ll switch to all Hawaiian shirts.

[mopinko]

16. or

old rock and roll tees.

those are a big collectible these days, tho. so if you dont have, it'll cost ya.

[irisblue]

30. Cirque, men in polo shirts and jeans who are moving as if they know what is what

Give off the aura of helpers.

Polo shirts.

[Sentath]

32. Trader Joe's!

.. ask me how I know. | :

( ;

[JustABozoOnThisBus]

40. No, don't do that. Hawaiian shirts are the uniform of Boogaloo Boys.

If they had an ounce of sense, they'd trademark it.

Maybe if they hired Ivanka as a consultant ...

[Cirque du So-What]

41. i didn't know that

Farkin' racists ruin everything.

[csziggy]

51. Or get a hole bunch of your friends to dress alike and show up at the same time

Or plan a musical event:

I love these guys! They started with the frozen Grand Central and come up with all sorts of fun pranks.

For Covid they did the Socially Distanced Office:

[doc03]

13. Wear a MAGA cap they will think you are an asshole and a moran. nt

[peacebuzzard]

25. eventually those hats will go into hiding.

even here in TN rural red counties
(although my red county urban area voted almost 50% Dem, the Magas gather here often for protest or socializing)

[5X]

17. My new mission for retirement is to see how many stores I get fired from without working there. n/t

[hlthe2b]

18. I have that happen a lot because I wear vests when I walk the dog for all my paraphernalia

and typically run into grocery stores for something quick afterward. Even though these don't look like commercial worker vests and have no logos, I guess... Still, the fact I have my hair pulled back under a baseball cap and sunglasses on over my facemask might give them a clue...

Darned stores reorganize their aisles so much I couldn't tell them where to find things most of the time, regardless.

[spinbaby]

21. I did this at Disney World once

I was standing around Epcot waiting for a friend when, thanks to my fairly neutral outfit, people kept asking me for directions. If I ever get back there, maybe I’ll do it again.

[Shermann]

26. Everybody laughs at the "People of Walmart"

But those people don't have your problem.

Maybe you should take a page from their book when you gear up and head out?

[peacebuzzard]

27. During pre-pandemic travel days

some of my male co-workers who wore suits with lapel pins would actually get offered tips if they helped anyone with their luggage while we waited for transportation at hotels curbs (of course, they would decline). I always got a kick out of that!

[NurseJackie]

31. Never wear a red shirt into Target.

The first and only time I did that, I was barely able to finish shopping without being approached by someone on almost every other aisle. (If I knew the answer to their question, I'd help... but most of the time, I didn't know.)

[Lonestarblue]

33. I learned long ago that the secret is to never make eye contact.

If you live in cities like New York, which was overrun with tourists when I lived there, you learn quickly that making eye contact is an invitation for confused tourists to spend the next 20 minutes trying to find out where they are and how to get to where they thought they were going. It’s fun the first few tourists, but then you have to head back to the office with no time for lunch!

[Ferrets are Cool]

34. Did you give yourself severance pay?

[Cirque du So-What]

36. Well, the employee discount diidn't work out so hot

so I'm guessing they won't be any more generous with severance pay.

[Me.]

35. Maybe You Look Like Somebody Who KNows Something

[Cirque du So-What]

37. Joke's on them

l don't know shit.

[yuiyoshida]

38. maybe you have to leave the home depot

gear at home... kidding... Some people just have that trusting face, and look like they work there...I guess. With me... People used to come up and asked me if I spoke English... to which i would replay "Hai , wakarimasu" especially if they were taking a survey. I could see why they might be confused.

[Illumination]

39. That's SO funny! Maybe you could collect hazard pay?

[c-rational]

42. You've got the look.

[GETPLANING]

43. I have actually done this,

I walked into a restaurant that I frequent a few times per month, that has a typical waitstaff of young people. Saw a young black woman walking across the floor, said hello to her, but in my mind, I thought she was one of the waitresses. She then sat down at a table with someone who appeared to be her dad or an older friend. Fortunately, I didn't so something really stupid like ask her for a menu. So, lesson learned.

[panader0]

44. I always seem to meet little old ladies who want me to reach something up high.

But I have never and could never work in customer service or sales.

[paleotn]

45. Ooofff! That was good.

You do know there are different polymers, but pvc pipes are pretty darn tough.

I'm terrible at front line, customer stuff as well. In college, I worked for Sears in hardware and automotive for 2 years. I quickly discovered I'm not cut out for it. But I stuck with it because the pay was good, in relative terms, and it offered snippets of study time between busy spurts. And restaurant work. I have trouble hiding my thoughts and feelings, so I wasn't terribly good at that either. The eye roll is difficult to control. The folks in that biz have my deepest admiration.

[HariSeldon]

48. A lot of drain pipes are ABS, not PVC nt

[paleotn]

49. That is true. Old black pipe.

Or new black pipe. They still sell it.

[BobTheSubgenius]

46. I love those moments!

I hope you enjoyed it.

[ChazInAz]

47. Normal occurance for me!

I don't really look particularly approachable. (Think of Bela Lugosi with a Van Dyke and long hair.)
But when I'm in Tandy's Leather, most of my fellow customers assume I work there. Probably because I know what I'm looking for, and have a vague air of intelligence. The result is the same as an episode of "Big Bang Theory", when Sheldon was mistaken for a staff member in an electronics store. (One of my favorite episodes, as one may imagine.)
As I have been earning an extra income as a leather artisan since 1968, I can usually give a lot of help and assistance to shoppers.
Strangely, Tandy's has never hired me, despite my not-so-subtle suggestions and job applications.

[sarcasmo]

50. Wearing orange at Home Depot, blue at Walmart and red at Target could cause this problem.

[LeftInTX]

52. One time at O'Hare airport, a ticket agent assumed I was another employee

I can't remember which airline I was flying, but I guess it was the polyester that I was wearing! (1970s)