Take these easy steps to handle that hangover By Mike Royko
Mike Royko is a Chicago columnist who died some years back. This column first appeared on Dec. 27, 1974. His humor is a bit abrasive. I miss his columns. He very much was a big part of Chicago:
This is the time of year when all sorts of advice is written about hangovers.
The articles usually touch on three key points: What a hangover is, how to avoid one, and how to cure it.
Defining a hangover is simple. It is nature's way of telling you that you got drunk. I've never understood why nature goes to the bother, since millions of wives pass on the information.
Except for abstinence or moderation, there is no way to completely avoid a hangover.
But there are certain rules that, if followed, will ease the discomfort.
First, stick with the same drink you started with. By that I mean that if you started the evening drinking champagne, beer and frozen daiquiris, stick with champagne, beer and frozen daiquiris the rest of the evening.
Drink quickly. If you can do most of your drinking within the first hour of the party and quickly pass out, you will have regained consciousness and be well on your way to recovery while others are still gadding about. By the time the Rose Bowl game comes on, your eyeballs will have come out from behind your nose.
Be careful what you eat, particularly later into the night. Especially avoid eating napkins, paper plates and pizza boards.
If you follow these rules, you'll still have a hangover. So the question is, how to get through it with a minimum of agony.
It should be remembered that part of a hangover's discomfort is psychological.
When you awaken, you will be filled with a deep sense of shame, guilt, disgust, embarrassment, humiliation and self-loathing.
This is perfectly normal, understandable and deserved.
To ease these feelings, try to think only of the pleasant or amusing things that you did before blacking out. Let your mind dwell on how you walked into the party and said hello to everyone, and handed your host your coat, and shook hands, and admired the stereo system.
Blot from your mind all memories of what you later did to your host's rug, what you said to that lady with the prominent cleavage that made her scream, whether you or her husband threw the first punch. Don't dredge up those vague recollections of being asleep in your host's bathtub while everybody pleaded with you to unlock the bathroom door. ... more at http://articles.baltimoresun.com/1994-01-03/news/1994003138_1_avoid-a-hangover-daiquiris-frozen
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