I guess its okay to share this here...

[Left Coast2020]

So here goes. From Stumbleupon:

SOMETIMES YOU SHOULD THINK BEFORE YOU OPEN YOUR MOUTH.

Have you ever asked your child a question too many times?
My three-year-old son had a lot of problems with potty training
and I was on him constantly. One day we stopped at Taco Bell
for a quick lunch, in between errands It was very busy,
with a full dining room. While enjoying my taco,
I smelled something funny, so of course I checked
my seven-month-old daughter, she was clean.
The realized that Danny had not asked to go potty
in a while. I asked him if he needed to go,
and he said 'No' .. I kept thinking
'Oh Lord, that child has had an accident, and
I don't have any clothes with me.' Then I said,
'Danny, are you SURE you didn't have an accident?'
'No,' he replied.
I just KNEW that he must have had an accident,
because the smell was getting worse.
Soooooo, I asked one more time, 'Danny did you have an accident ?
This time he jumped up, yanked down his pants,
bent over, spread his cheeks
and yelled
'SEE MOM, IT'S JUST FARTS!!'
While 30 people nearly choked to death on their tacos laughing,
he calmly pulled up his pants and sat down.

An old couple made me feel better, thanking me for the
best laugh they'd ever had!



Forgive me, but I just had to share this. I was LMAO too. Been a bad week and this was just what the doctor ordered. Cheers.

[awoke_in_2003]

1. I would have required the heimlich...

Had I seen that.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

2. Never a dull moment with kids!

[rug]

3. It's not just the kids.

My wife was waiting for the elevator at the Museum of Natural History. It was pretty crowded and soon there were about a dozen people waiting, including a couple holding a baby. Well, the love of my life let out a quiet noxious emission and just stood there. After about a half minute, the mother pulled back her baby's diaper and looked around apolegetically. My wife said, "Come on, let's take stairs" and pulled the kids away. My daughter looked at her and said, "Was that you?" The only answer she got was "Shut up."

[TreasonousBastard]

4. This might be the time to repeat the tale of that fateful day at K-Mart...

shortly after Christmas years ago, the store was dead empty and there was no heating or colling going on, so no ventilation fans.

Something I ate caused an emission Assad would envy and while I was watching the greenish cloud peel the labels off of cans, I heard voices a few aisles down.

Scooting away as fast as I could, I heard the shuffle of feet where I was standing a few moments ago and then hear a mighty "GODDAM! Watchoo do?"

"It wasn't me. Hadda be you!" came the plaintive reply and the argument went on for as long as I could hear them.

[Tigress DEM]

5. Damm - where is the REC Again? button

Don't light up in here, that could be dangerous!!

[Xipe Totec]

6. Damn! Flashbacks

Not of you,


of him....