Welcome to DU!
The truly grassroots left-of-center political community where regular people, not algorithms, drive the discussions and set the standards.
Join the community:
Create a free account
Support DU (and get rid of ads!):
Become a Star Member
All Forums
Issue Forums
Culture Forums
Alliance Forums
Region Forums
Support Forums
Help & Search
The DU Lounge
Related: Culture Forums, Support ForumsI apologize for the evil I have unleashed upon the world.
My son posted this in response to my post calling him and my husband grinches.
Santa is an un-healthy criminal! Breaks into yer house and steals milk and cookies, and then leaves either gifts or coal dependent on your behavior for the year, like its ok to break into someone's home at night while they sleep, steal shit but leave something in it's stead! Then all those milk and cookies he eats has got to be makin him diabetic after all these years! Only a matter of time before the fat jolly bastard loses a foot! And why should the poor kids that hadn't been raised right get coal!? Its not their fault they dont know better! How about getting the parents audited by the irs!? Fitting punishment for bad parenting i think!
I'm so sorry.
In my defense, he did spend 9 years in the Marine Corps, so they're partially to blame.
Dear Santa, if you're reading this, he really is a good kid. He's an amazing husband and the best son anyone could ask for. He apparently just thinks your way of doing things is suspect. Oh, and that you should go on a diet.
InfoView thread info, including edit history
TrashPut this thread in your Trash Can (My DU » Trash Can)
BookmarkAdd this thread to your Bookmarks (My DU » Bookmarks)
8 replies, 1382 views
ShareGet links to this post and/or share on social media
AlertAlert this post for a rule violation
PowersThere are no powers you can use on this post
EditCannot edit other people's posts
ReplyReply to this post
EditCannot edit other people's posts
Rec (0)
ReplyReply to this post
8 replies
= new reply since forum marked as read
Highlight:
NoneDon't highlight anything
5 newestHighlight 5 most recent replies
I apologize for the evil I have unleashed upon the world. (Original Post)
Wait Wut
Nov 2013
OP
Scuba
(53,475 posts)1. Ever notice that Santa and Satan are spelled almost identically?
And you never see the two of them together?
Wait Wut
(8,492 posts)2. You're on the list.
Not the good one, either.
Scuba
(53,475 posts)3. You know why Santa's so jolly?
He knows where the naughty girls live.
Wait Wut
(8,492 posts)4. Hell isn't full, yet.
Keep going.
In_The_Wind
(72,300 posts)5. Not to worry ...
A memo came earlier this month.
Your copy must be delayed by all the black friday sale circulars being mailed out.
Wait Wut
(8,492 posts)6. Thank God.
I'm broke this year. I should add that it's the evil child's fault that I'm broke. Brat moved half way across the country and then needed a loan for a car because his Harley didn't come with snow tires.
In_The_Wind
(72,300 posts)7. " ... his Harley didn't come with snow tires ... "
I thought all ex-Marines were tough. Hasn't he heard of snow-chains?
Wait Wut
(8,492 posts)8. I suggested chains.
He wasn't sure it was a good idea. And, Marines are tough enough, but they don't bounce.