Of the people you care about the most who is the hardest to shop for?

[Locut0s]

And why?

I'm sure we all have that one loved one we HATE shopping for come Christmas. Who is yours and why?

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For me it's definitely my mother. My father is easy, get him some good books (as you can see from my other post) and he's happy as a clam. Or failing that some tech toy. He loves his cell phones and tablets and other gadgets. My mother on the other hand... Uhhh.... *shudder* I love her but, shopping for her is like having teeth pulled. She never spends ANY money on herself if she can avoid it and doesn't really enjoy getting presents in the first place. She just tells us to give her money, which she will promptly put away and never use. She can never get herself to enjoy anything herself if spending money is involved. She will never pamper herself, rarely buys new cloths, you get the picture. She rarely seems thankful for receiving gifts either as she worries about the money spent on it. There have been the odd occasion though when the stars aligned and somehow something magical occurred and she really loved a gift. So my father is the man who has everything for whom any gift is a welcome one. My mother is the woman with nothing for which any gift is "too much". What do you get for a person like this??? True we could just give her money like I said, but that's no fun for us.

This year I think I've settled on an OK compromise. She used to be an avid painter and want's to get back to it some day. She has done the odd painting here and there over the years but nothing like 10+ years ago. So I got her a $150 Gift Certificate to a large art supply store nearby. It's pretty close to cash

[blogslut]

1. Most mothers do that.

No matter how old you are or how successful, they never stop being Mothers. They will always and forever want to you to understand that you come first.

I think your gift is lovely.

[Phentex]

2. Mom here and I'll be blunt...

I recognize some of myself in your post. I HATE shopping and will only shop for myself when I absolutely have to. It's not that I worry about the money, it just always seems frivolous and pointless. Gift cards put more pressure on me because then it's like I am forced to go shopping. Most of the time I end up buying something for someone else IF I ever even attempt to use the card. Book stores are a true exception because I love the entire experience of visiting a book store.

My boys are younger than you and don't have real funds but that hasn't stopped them from giving something meaningful. One knows that I love circus peanuts but it's not something I think of buying myself so he got me a bag of circus peanuts with a list of things called My Mom is Different Because...and had stuff like She Likes Circus Peanuts etc. One year he wrote a funny poem. He is into photography so he took some pretty pictures and had a set printed for me.

My other one gave me a year of car washes (by him!) cause I hate doing that. He once gave me a Kermit address book cause he knows how much I love the Muppets. The point is not how much money but finding something your mom cares about or something that is just for her.

Does she drink coffee or tea? I don't care how much fine china a person has, a beautiful tea cup is still special and there are so many different kinds of tea to try. Same for coffee.

Experiences are always good. Can you take her to lunch some place she's never been? Just the two of you. Is there a painting class you could do with her?

Finally, as cheesy as it sounds, there's nothing like a really sweet card telling her how much you appreciate her and all she does for you and your family.

[LiberalEsto]

3. Those are good suggestions

Another: Design a coupon for an art class, and include the class schedule for a community center or local college. She chooses one she likes, and you pay for it. Or you and your father can share the cost of the class.

Personally, I love gardening, but don't have as much energy or strength as I once did.
A couple of years ago, I asked for some bags of compost and manure for my birthday (in March), along with having the bags carried into the garden and emptied into the planting beds. It sounds strange, but there was nothing I needed or wanted more than that.

[Locut0s]

6. Thank you Phentex. Those are some great ideas. However...

Most wouldn't work with my mother. For her it's much more about the money worry and other issues. She has trouble enjoying herself on a fundamental level. We have tried several things along similar lines in the past. My father bought her a spa package one year, she has trouble relaxing too. Nope she only got kind of angry at that one. We tried getting her a molly maid service one year to help with the house work since she works so much harder than my father at her job and does housework on top of it. Nope wasn't having any of that. I try to ask if I can help out with the vacuuming of the house all the time, nope she is pathological about getting it just right to her standards. She seems to like suffering in some ways and rejects offers that would help.

The meal idea is not a bad one she does like eating. But even in these cases she refuses to order anything but the cheapest items on the menu, regardless of who is paying. We eat out weekly a lot as a family anyway though so it would need to be something more special which again would be an issue.

Thanks for the suggestions though. I know where you are coming from and it was kind of you suggest them!

[pipi_k]

4. For me, it's

Mr Pipi, who has tons of stuff already and the means to buy just about anything he would want or need.

Within reason, I mean. We're not fabulously wealthy or anything.

I'm sure he would say the same about me as well.

So we try to make gift giving to each other as easy as possible by setting up Wish Lists at Amazon.com.

My mom lives in Florida, and each year she sends us kids and the grown grandkids our yearly orange and grapefruit gift boxes, which, strangely enough, are eagerly anticipated by all. The fruit is always sweet and juicy, and along with the fruit are a little jar of orange marmalade and three chocolate covered coconut patties.

I send her back a food basket from Figis.

One year for her birthday (I think it was her 70th) I sent her a Hello Kitty wristwatch as a joke. She loved it. She's like an overgrown kid sometimes.

So when I consider gifts for her, I start there.

[MissMillie]

5. me

shopping for myself is always a pain in the neck.

Thank goodness I don't do it very often.

[femmocrat]

7. My son.

I have no idea what he likes and he won't give me a list. He drives me crazy.

[graywarrior]

8. Mr G

He wants things that don't exist.