The Dunmow Oath

[My Good Babushka]

You shall swear by the Custom of our Confession
that you never made any nuptial transgression
since you were married to your wife
by household brawls or contentious strife
or otherwise in bed and board
offended each other in deed or word
or since the parish clerk said 'Amen'
wished yourself unmarried again
or in a twelve month and a day
repented not in thought anyway
but continued true and in desire
as when you joined hands in the Holy Quire.
If to these conditions without all feare
of your own accord you will freely swear,
a gammon of bacon you shall receive
and bear it hence with love and good leave.
For this is our custom in Dunmow well known,
though the sport be ours, the bacon's your own.