WTF, Mansion People!

[blogslut]

This has been bothering me, festering in my soul, for quite a while and I simply must understand it.

Bathroom-to-Bedroom ratios in the houses of the wealthy are FUCKED UP. I go to teh gossip blogs. I read descriptions of the NYT's real estate page on Wonkette. I admit it. I enjoy what I like to call "house porn". But what I don't get, what makes my wee brain rattle is when I read something like this:

The elegant house has five bedrooms, [font size=5]five full baths[/font] and [font size=5]three half-baths[/font].

Why is this a thing? Description after description these rich abodes contain sometimes as many, but often, more bathrooms than bedrooms!

Why? Does the upper class need to wash their hands more than normal people because they're so rich they stink? Are they so wealthy they just poo money 24/7?

Why for is this happening? Why?

[sakabatou]

1. To show off their wealth for guests?

[blogslut]

2. But why bathrooms?

Is it because the fixtures and plumbing cost so much more than some lousy library, solarium or map room? Why bathrooms? Why why why?

[Tobin S.]

3. It has to do with the size of the house.

When you are living in a house the size of the Metrodome, and it only has two bathrooms, you may shit yourself by the time you make it to one of the bathrooms. So, to prevent this, there needs to be at least a toilet for every 10,000 square feet of living space.

[blogslut]

4. Perhaps.

But why not install Star Trek-style transporters so that they can be anywhere within their gilded walls instantaneously? Would this not be a far greater show of societal prominence than a preponderance of tinkle taverns?

[Rhiannon12866]

11. +10,000!

[Avalux]

5. That house is for lazy people, too lazy to walk upstairs or wherever to the bathroom.

I'm sure they won't be cleaning all those bathrooms either.

[blogslut]

8. Are they lazy?

Or are they rubes that fall for the grand plans of greedy architects, designers and builders? I bet the folks responsible have a bathroom quota and give bonuses for xtra ones!

[TexasTowelie]

6. I bet the water in the shower gets scalding

when all the toilets are flushed at once!

[Chan790]

7. Partially what Tobin said...

and partially because I don't want guests in my personal bathroom.

(I grew up with this kind of wealth. I never realized we were rich, like really rich, until I got to college.)

[blogslut]

9. You're not helping to reduce my disdain.

It didn't use to be this way. I got a rich uncle, owns banks n stuff. His house never had more bathrooms than bedrooms.

[Chan790]

13. Times are different.

We have 4 BR, 4 BA and 2 .5BA in the estate house.

The four full bathrooms are attached to the bedrooms: Master suite. My old bedroom. Crash's bedroom. (Crash is my 27 year old feckless excuse for a brother...4 years of college at U. of Hartford to flip burgers.) Guest bedroom. This is necessary because otherwise the 3 adults that live there would rifle my personal toiletries...my parents would steal condoms and that's just disturbing. Remember this is a house built to accommodate 5 adults, such as when we all come home for the holidays. None of us were children when it was built.

The half-baths...those are for company and regular use. One is off the kitchen and is primarily used by people coming from outside and people who are covered with dirt...it's not a nice bathroom; it's designed to be hosed out, there's a drain in the floor and paper-towels. The other is off the hall near the living room, that's the main 1st-floor bathroom with the hand-soaps and nice towels.

[blogslut]

14. Read #12

Nope. I'm not having it.

[MicaelS]

10. It makes sense if you think about it.

Most of these houses have what are referred to as "ensuite" bathrooms. In other words, each and every bedroom has its own unique bathroom, and the only entrance to and from that bathroom in inside the particular bedroom. These bathrooms are designed NOT to be public. They are not available to anyone walking in from the rest of the house. Americans want privacy using the bathroom, especially when using the toilet, and they don't want others, even family members walking in on them when using the bathroom. They don't want others coming into their extremely private space where they do their most intimate business of bathing and elimination thus possibly witnessing the mess, stains, and smells. One of my friends told me that he and his wife never walk in on one another when use the toilet.

So people today want space for themselves, and space for others. The half baths are just that -"space for others". Often they are close to the kitchen, dining or general family rooms. It is very costly to add a bath later. Better just to build more than you might need. Better to have and not need, than need and not have.

My apartment has two bedrooms and two full bathrooms. One of the bedrooms / bathrooms is ensuite as I described above.

[blogslut]

12. Stop making sense!

You are not feeding into my outrage properly!

Although, sociologically speaking, bathrooms should be the great equalizers in human world. People (especially family-type people) should made to wait for bathroom time like TV tropes intended. We should ALL be exposed to the realities of body functions and effluvia. We defy evolutionary logic by forcing our toddlers to relieve themselves in a pre-approved fixture and then turn around and literally give them spaces to poo and pee wherever they want?

No. This will not stand. Less bathrooms! More solariums and map rooms!

[Tsiyu]

16. My aunt's house has eight bedrooms and thirteen bathrooms

I asked the same question......

As for the map rooms and solariums, don't forget the room in Running With Scissors:







The Masturbatorium!

[blogslut]

18. Indeed!

I give my rock-solid relationship with my sister as further evidence to the importance of bathroom sharing:

Not even our legendary bathroom slap fight over the hot rollers could break our union because years previous we composed an EPIC letter to our parents - who we were convinced had abandoned us in the parking lot of some roadside attraction (bar) to "go to the toilet".

That bond got us through many a road trip where our itinerary-obsessed father refused to take potty breaks. Let me tell you, you learn a real lesson when you accept that you prefer to pee on the side of the road rather than use Mother's dreaded "jar". These are memories that cannot be bought with monogrammed towels and sculpted soaps.

Down with en-suites!

[rrneck]

15. Party house needs lots of puke stations! nt

[In_The_Wind]

17. Whenever possible (imo) each adult should have their own bathroom.

http://www.dnainfo.com/new-york/20140515/bushwick/polyamorous-home-bushwick-looks-for-tenants-wanting-judgment-free-life

[marzipanni]

19. The largest single family house in the U.S. has 29 bedrooms and 39 bathrooms

and it's a summer house in the Hamptons.
http://www.zillow.com/homedetails/281-Daniels-Ln-NY-11963/32729233_zpid/
(If you look at the link be sure to click on the satellite view and the little squares on it)
The annual property tax was $508,006.00 in 2010.

I suppose, if the owner wanted to sell, it could be turned into a summer hotel for germaphobes!

[Kali]

20. one for the pool area and one for the salon or whatever the "entertaining" room is called.

the neighbors have a cool old house that was built by a rich guy in the 40s. There is a 1/2 bathroom right by the front door entryway which goes leads into the front "living room". not a bad idea on a ranch 5 miles down a rough dirt road. Visitors might like to pee and freshen up after the journey in.

these things are generally for guests more than the residents. I would love to have one clean area for visitors, myself.

visit me and you sit on the front porch and as soon as possible hauled off on a tour in the truck. away from the messy house. (just ask Ptah)

[Arugula Latte]

21. So many of those houses are inhabited by only two people, too.

I don't get the waste of resources -- that would give me zero pleasure.