How I popped the question:

[trof]

It was 1968.
The future Miz t. and I were 'cohabiting without the benefit of clergy'.
At the time this 'wasn't done' in our circle of family and friends.
Did I mention that it was 1968 and we were NOT HIPPIES?
Just a couple of middle class 20-somethings.

We were romantically involved and I needed a place to stay for a few months until I left town and the state for a career as a pilot with TWA and she had this nice apartment in Birmingham, sooo....
And that's a long story for another time.

At some point in our relationship that summer I decided she was 'The One'.
I was pretty sure she felt the same way about me.
Later she told me "I knew before you did, it just took you a little longer to accept the idea."


My mother had died the year before and my grandmother was my closest relative. I wanted to see her in Kentucky and tell her in person that I was going to propose.

She was delighted.
Then she said "We need to go to the bank. I have your mother's wedding ring in my safety deposit box. You should have it."
OK, sure.

We went to the bank and got her safety deposit box.
She opened it and brought out a dark blue velvet ring case.
She opened it and there was a ROCK set in white gold.
I was expecting a plain gold band, I guess.
I was floored.

Than she said "I hope it's not bad luck. I don't think it is."
My mother and father had divorced when I was 4 and I'd never seen him again.
"No, I don't think it will be either."

I returned to 'our' apartment in Birmingham where I found the future Miz t. sick in bed. Took her to the ER where we learned she had a urinary infection. They doctored her up and we went home.

I propped her up on the couch and said I had something to ask her.
I got down on one knee (Hey, that's how you do it, right?) and showed her the ROCK and asked her to marry me.
She began to cry.

"I thought you were going to break up with me. I mean you're going away to start a brand new career in a big city and maybe didn't want any excess baggage or loose ends..." etc., etc.

Boy, was she wrong.
One of the very few times in our life together.
45 years and one amazing daughter later I'm still pretty sure mom's ring wasn't bad luck.

[shenmue]

1. Awwwww

Squee!

[CaliforniaPeggy]

2. What a beautiful story, my dear trof...

Thank you!

[mysuzuki2]

3. How I pooped the question (no pun intended)?

We were sitting on the couch. The lights were dim and romantic music was playing. I looked deep in her eyes and said "You're what? Are you sure?"

[mnhtnbb]

4. That is such a nice story.

Congrats on so many happy years together...and more to come!

[awoke_in_2003]

5. Much better than my story

I had gotten the ring, and went home after work. I tried, and finally succeeded to get her to go out to eat so I could pop the question. Why was that hard to do? Because every one else in the US, except me, was glued to the TV watching OJ do his slow speed run from the law.

[840high]

6. My love told me - "the only

carat you'll get is the one you grow in your garden". Then he handed me a little box - 1/2 carat.

[rurallib]

7. Nice story - sometimes I think some kids of a broken household

are very aware not to repeat mistakes of their parents.

My follow up story would be that one of our SILs actually asked for our daughter's hand in marriage - yep the old fashioned way.
I was so overwhelmed I didn't know what to do. My first question was "Have you talked this over with her?" Seemed like a good question at the time. They have been married 12 years now with one amazing curly haired cutie (boy) to show for it.

As for us, I think it was pretty common in the day. Same era as you. We lived together for about a year and one night at - uh - the ending rituals I said maybe we ought to get married.

[trof]

8. I did travel to Houston to ask her father for her hand. What a trip.

In more ways than one.

Her family is pure Cajun.
I was pure WASP.

Dad was a carpenter from NOLA, mom was a housefrau from a rice farm near a wide place in the road an hour from Lake Charles in Calcasieu Parrish.
Miz t. is one of 6; 3 girls, 3 boys.
It was an interesting visit.


I slept on the sofa bed and 'Pop' ("Ehboddy calls me 'Pop'. You kin call me Pop".) got me up at 5 a.m. my first morning there.
"C'mon, we gonna get some awrster."

I thought it was damned early to be going to a seafood market until I saw the boat and trailer hooked up to the pick up truck in the driveway. There were two big washtubs encircled by inflated inner-tubes in the boat.
We are not going to a market.

He took us to Bastrop Bayou and we launched the boat. We wound around some canals and I remember thinking that if he had a heart attack I was gonna die out there too because I had no idea how to get back.

He found some super-secret cove and we anchored.
Over the side into warm hip deep water.
He tied one of the tubs to his belt and the other to mine.
Gave me a pair of cotton gloves and a ball peen hammer with a rope loop through the handle.
"Put duh loop roun yo wrist. Doan lose yo hammah."

He showed me how to feel with my sneakers for a clump of oysters; then bring it up and 'cull' the open and dead shells with the hammer, then toss the good ones into my tub.

We got two tubs full. Took both of us to wrestle each one into the boat.
And now...NOW...he asked "You like awrsters?"
Well, it happened I did.

He opened the cooler I'd noticed and handed me an ice cold beer. Lone Star.
Handed me an oyster knife.
"I see you right handed. Keep yo left glove awn."
I'd never shucked an oyster, but I watched Pop and caught on pretty fast.
We sat there and each ate about a dozen of the freshest oysters I've ever had in my life.
And THAT was my initiation into the family.

On the way back home Pop said "You gonna take good care ah mah dawter, right?"
"Yes sir, I will."
And I did.

[whistler162]

11. At least he didn't introduce you to his friend

Last edited Sat Jul 26, 2014, 09:31 PM - Edit history (1)

Al Lee Gatr.

Co-worker just proposed to his long time girlfriend. Even though she has been with him through the worst, broken arm and later a shattered lower leg, she accepted. Got her fathers written okay before the trip. I hope they have as long as you two.

[rurallib]

13. Wow - I'd would've been heading for the hills

after that

[trof]

9. True. My son-in-law comes from a split marriage.

Sometimes I think he goes a teeny bit overboard to have something like a modern day 'Leave It to Beaver/Father Knows Best' family, but I love him and he's a great husband and dad.

[trof]

10. And I forgot to ask in the OP "How did you pop the question?" All please chime in.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

12. You want to know how I got proposed to?

We were out driving (I was doing the driving!) and I asked him: "Are you ever going to propose?" There was a silence. Then he said, "oh I dunno...one of these days, I guess." Another pause.

And then he said: "You aren't going to refuse me, are you?"

"Oh, probably not."

And that was as close to a proposal as I got.