4 Copy Editors Killed In Ongoing AP Style, Chicago Manual Gang Violence

[ashling]

4 Copy Editors Killed In Ongoing AP Style, Chicago Manual Gang Violence
http://www.theonion.com/articles/4-copy-editors-killed-in-ongoing-ap-style-chicago,30806/

NEW YORK—Law enforcement officials confirmed Friday that four more copy editors were killed this week amid ongoing violence between two rival gangs divided by their loyalties to the The Associated Press Stylebook and The Chicago Manual Of Style. “At this time we have reason to believe the killings were gang-related and carried out by adherents of both the AP and Chicago styles, part of a vicious, bloody feud to establish control over the grammar and usage guidelines governing American English,” said FBI spokesman Paul Holstein, showing reporters graffiti tags in which the word “anti-social” had been corrected to read “antisocial.” “The deadly territory dispute between these two organizations, as well as the notorious MLA Handbook gang, has claimed the lives of more than 63 publishing professionals this year alone.” Officials also stated that an innocent 35-year-old passerby who found himself caught up in a long-winded dispute over use of the serial, or Oxford, comma had died of a self-inflicted gunshot wound.

[In_The_Wind]

1. Misuse of a comma is a serious thing.

NEWS IN BRIEF • Our Annual Year 2013 • News Media • News • ISSUE 49•01 • Jan 7, 2013

That is, except for a lounge post.

[ashling]

8. It is a real

who [strike through]done[/strike through] did it

[rurallib]

2. I heard another died of an impacted colon:

[rug]

3. The names of the antecedents will not be released until their relatives are notified.

[pinboy3niner]

6. Nice one!

[ashling]

7. It is a tense affair

Professor Plum ...

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in the library ...


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with a [strike through]cake knife [/strike through]cake-knife

[pinboy3niner]

10. You obviously don't even have a clue about what's happening

Just because you have a plum job over there doesn't mean you can cut the mustard here. It may be wrenching for you to hear this but you've given yourself enough rope to hang you with. Conservatoryally speaking, that is.

[ashling]

11. Pro-life ... or pro-noun?

Last edited Tue Aug 19, 2014, 05:05 PM - Edit history (1)

you've given yourself enough rope [strike through] to hang you with[/strike through]

[font color = red] with which to hang yourself

[pinboy3niner]

4. I know nothing. NOTHING!

[Enrique]

12. i get it

[whistler162]

5. That explains it....

Now we know why ABCNews can't hire a copy editor that can read and correct the grammar errors in recent news stories.

[kiva]

9. The Turabians rule...

we use footnotes.

[ashling]

14. I would like to throw in my lot with Ms. Turabian and her followers

op. cit.

[kiva]

15. We are many...

we meet in the secret passageway under Grant's Tomb.

[Blue_Tires]

13. Which color do I wear to show my allegiance to the AP?

And who do I need to shiv?