Is this a lawyer thing, or is it just a local peculiarity?
Last edited Thu Sep 24, 2015, 10:55 AM - Edit history (2)
My community has a history of legal troubles that were made worse by lawyers who, among other ethical considerations, did not declare their conflicts of interest. Because they live in the city it makes for interesting human dynamics since you never know when you're going to bump into one of them. Once, I walked into my daughter's school program and saw a lawyer who, I sincerely believed, failed to declare his personal and business conflicts when he tried to represent our HOA. I shared this information with my neighbors at a HOA meeting, and to my consternation, did not get the reaction I expected. As difficult as that experience was for me, it was the moment that I realized that my community was infiltrated with members of the good ole boy network that exists in this city.
So, properly put in my place, I withdrew and tried to keep a low profile for years for the sake of my children. But, there were still those school events to attend and, sure enough, I walked into a venue once and saw a couple of them across the room. I had no intention of approaching them, and, indeed, tried to find a spot elsewhere in the room. But the reaction from the two was distressing to me. Once they spotted me they looked around nervously, looking for allies, as if they thought I was going to do something rash. It was a double insult, not just because I felt victimized by the devious events that took place a decade earlier, but their reaction communicated to me that I was now branded, "dangerous," like a wounded animal. I found it very offensive and demoralizing.
But here's the behavior that concerns me the most: Years later, I was finishing up at the counter at the post office and turned around to leave. In the long line was the lawyer's wife. I didn't know she was there until she stepped out and practically blocked my way. She had this broad smile and friendly demeanor like we were old friends. I was shocked. Here is someone that belonged to a network that helped turn me into a pariah, and now she was going out of her way for a face to face confrontation.
I didn't change my pace. Just kept my eye on her as I walked around her. Didn't utter a word.
Only later did it occur to me that if I had been hot-headed, as many were in my city back in the nineties, I would have given her an event that she could have used to show that she was the injured party, which couldn't be further from the truth. It shook me to think that they could be that deliberate.
Recently, I saw another lawyer do the same thing. Now, I'm not sure of all of the neighborhood dynamics because this is not a friendly community and even if you did talk to someone, no one will admit they know anything about any of the devious contrivances that are common. So, I can only try to interpret what I witnessed.
This lawyer approached a couple who, as I once did, dared to address the good ole boy improprieties in this neighborhood. They were walking by her house when she went out of her way to engage them in conversation. She used the same friendly demeanor as the lawyer who stepped out of the post office line to speak to me.
It was odd, especially when the couple kept walking, though they appeared sociable and civil. She kept pace with them a little ways. I wondered if they knew that they were in range of a security camera that was recently installed by one of the neighbors that are part of her cabal by extension.
Nothing happened. The couple passed the test. But, I couldn't help getting the feeling how many of us are judged like dogs in a dog show that have to go through a conformation test. They have to stand poised, while the judge grabs their balls. If you move, you're disqualified.
Anyway, are these contrived social interactions common in the lawyer field? Because, if it is, they should start their own reality show. I admit I'm intrigued.
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