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Related: Culture Forums, Support ForumsI married a monster
What kind of uncivilized monster buys the Halloween big bag of Starbursts (the one with the individually wrapped packages of 2 Starbursts) and then opens most of the little packages only picking out the dark red ones (cherry), leaving behind half packages of orange and lemon? My husband, that's who. Then he doesn't even bother to hide his trail - I found little red wrappers strewn about the kitchen.
I am so glad we don't have children - what a terrible example he would set. Not to mention he also takes bites out of cookies, brownies, and cake then puts them back in the package/container and acts surprised when I complain. There are two humans in this house (2 dogs and a cat as well), and I leave no remains when it comes to sweets.
Thank goodness he has some redeeming qualities - sweet, loving, smart, and has a big heart. Otherwise...
petronius
(26,597 posts)nadine_mn
(3,702 posts)then they magically became his favorite..lol
frogmarch
(12,153 posts)he sounds adorable! And his redeeming qualities are those that everyone should have.
trueblue2007
(17,193 posts)47of74
(18,470 posts)...of course you also have 2 dogs which they don't currently have.
Tace
(6,800 posts)And the artificial red flavor comes from beaver anal glands. Yum!
Skittles
(153,111 posts)YOU KNOW I WOULD DO THAT FOR YOU MY SWEET
Thanks Skittles, I know coming here was the right move!
UTUSN
(70,644 posts)nadine_mn
(3,702 posts)And hiding your tracks?? He needs to hide his evidence better...lol
UTUSN
(70,644 posts)As for hiding tracks/evidence, now *there* is a skill!1
(Actually, you two sound great together!1)
fizzgig
(24,146 posts)my favorite candy flavor is purple, followed by pink. green is acceptable if it's lime or a green apple jolly rancher. lemon is acceptable if it's lemon. green apple, orange and banana are never acceptable candy flavors.
i am such a candy racist.
KentuckyWoman
(6,679 posts)is that on your last day on the planet that dear man can still get your goat up.
nadine_mn
(3,702 posts)I love him more and more everyday. We have been married for 16 yrs and the beginning was rough (whoo boy rough), but once we learned how to fight and how to love better, it's been a breeze.
He may be a Starburst thief and a cookie nibbler, but when he hits the shower every now and then I ninja attack him (squirt gun of cold water, smearing of shaving cream). And by ninja attack I mean he can hear my maniacal giggle advancing towards him.
As long as we can still laugh and play, we will last forever.
CrawlingChaos
(1,893 posts)nadine_mn
(3,702 posts)Lizzie Poppet
(10,164 posts)Xipe Totec
(43,888 posts)HereSince1628
(36,063 posts)She was a Full Professor of English, head of her dept...
Somedays it seems she left off the person I knew with the keys she turned in
Other than that...
DFW
(54,277 posts)It would be asking a lot of a woman of any other profession to put up with me.