can i share a little joy?

[mopinko]

so, i have 5 kids. all crazy smart, which runs kinda deep in the family. no brag, just fact.
like all families full of such people, it was a slog.
mistakes were made.
wild-eyed parenting decisions led to them feeling pretty weird. which they were going to anyway, but i digress.

anyway, i am intensely proud of them all. but the one that has gone the farthest is my older of 2 sons, who is at u utah, getting a phd in theoretical math. our relationship is warm but rocky. he has been mad at me for a while.

well, yesterday he caved and refriended me on fb.
he isnt blabby on there. he doesnt share much.

but he writes some thoughtful and righteous posts, and i am so happy to read them again. but most of all, i have raised a young man who is as staunch a feminist as i am.
he actually used the word ovaries as a synonym for courage.
many other thoughtful posts about rape culture and racism.

and even tho he is a poor ta, he is posting about his year end giving.

i'm gettin teary.
just what i wanted for xmas.

[3catwoman3]

1. That sounds like a lot of joy, not...

...a little.

How delightful for you!

[mopinko]

2. ok. you're right.

it is a lot. been a year of mending fences for me. always feels good.

[jack69]

3. My son

was the victim of violence and at the age of 32 has lived with us for 10 years, probably for the rest of his life. All of his confidence was taken away, though he has a 40 hr/week job which I have to drive him to and pick him up. He has had three attempts, the last about 4+years ago. My joy is that he is still with us. A most righteous person, even though he does not believe any religious propaganda.

[mopinko]

4. i'm sorry. i have children with heavy sorrows, too.

i am proud of them all. and they all bring their own blend of joy and sorrow.

this boy is a special one, tho, and my fingers are always a bit crossed that nothing so senseless ever changes that.
so far i am a lucky woman in a whole lot of ways. but i know how quickly that can change.

i hope you can find some peace. i dont know if i could.

[jack69]

5. I'm about at the end of my own rope.

This is not how I envisioned my retirement(as of 2008). I realize that my needs are secondary to family and society needs. But, our time is not endless and I would love to have him able to thrive on his own with his own life and problems that go with it. Our daughter(4years older), has given us 4 grandchildren, 1st,2nd, 7th, and 11th grades and live in the same town. guess that gives us balance in the other way.
Sorry for my rant to complete strangers, this last month has not been our happiest one.
I did go to your FB page, Moah's Ark, but only momentarily.
My peace comes from knowing that goodness always prevails, even if not right away.

[mopinko]

6. i have one on that end, too.

my youngest is almost a perfect clone of her big brother, but with social skills. every bit as bright and talented.

but she had a head injury as a kid that was not detected. a cracked skull. no puking, no headache, no reason to think it was any more than a common bump on the head.
her childhood was swamped w medical issues, one more baffling than the next. chron's disease at 9. raynauds syndrome. a clotting disorder. heart arrhythmias.
she barely made it through high school, even tho her grades were great, she often had to drag herself through the day. thank god for a great school nurse.
she graduated w honors and a full boat to a private college.
2 weeks into the first term she had another medical situation that forced her out of school. she has so far not returned.

2 years ago, at 21, we finally discovered that she was having seizures. she had been having them all along, we just didnt know they were seizures. for a while they started becoming full blown hallucinations of people following her in the shadows.
they finally detected the injury. it is located in her temporal lobe. it has caused her autonomic system to be haywire.
her heart gets confused, her digestion shuts down, it affected her growth, including stunting her lungs.
worst of all she lives w terrible, amplified, chronic pain.

she keeps struggling to find a dream that she fulfill. she is already fully disabled, on disability.
fortunately mostly what she needs is money. she has a boyfriend that takes care of her. i worry about her alone, tho, and expect she would land back in the nest if that happened.

we are really fortunate that she has had great medical care. hopefully that will continue and hopefully some progress will be made on the issue of traumatic brain injuries.
for a whole life to be in turmoil because of a bruise the size of a golfball is really rather unbelievable to me sometimes. in the 21st century, it doesnt seem right.
it is good to vent. i am used to listening to people vent. all us parents of sickies vent at each other. it's how we know we are really tribe.
i am not the only one at du, either.

thanks for hitting the link. wander around a little. it is a peaceful place. watch some of the videos. they are mostly short, but fun. early ones of my 2 bulldogges as pups are pretty fun to watch.


hang in there, my friend. take care of yourself, too.

[dixiegrrrrl]

7. Oh, I hear exactly what you are feeling, yes indeed.

and indeed just in time for the giving season.