How do you know when it's time to let a pet go?

[alarimer]

My cat, Buddy, has developed a few issues over the last year. He has hyperthyroidism, controlled effectively for the moment. But he has also shown signs of kidney disease, which, as anyone who has cats knows, always gets worse eventually. He is on the special food, which is terribly expensive but doesn't appear to be helping all that much. He continues to lose weight (but I may not be feeding him enough, since he always seems to be hungry and willing to eat). I took him to the vet this morning because he was acting strangely. He was trying to poop but couldn't and appeared to be in some discomfort. Since he likes to chew on things he shouldn't, I thought it might be a blockage. It turns out that it's probably dehydration due to the kidney issues. But the vet was also concerned about elevated liver values. So she took some blood for tests and gave him some fluids.

But it got me to thinking about the end. How do you know? He doesn't appear to be suffering at the moment. He eats well. He hangs out with us and doesn't seem to sleep much more than normal. So I don't think it's time yet. But the vet also mentioned doing x-rays to look for abnormalities. If they find something, that may revolve things in one obvious direction.

I have always thought that I wouldn't hesitate to let him go if he was in obvious pain. But this is more a quality of life issue at this point. All of his current conditions can be treated, even if he doesn't like it much. But how long should I let it go on for? He won't get better; it's more a question now of postponing the inevitable.

[Arkansas Granny]

1. My rule of thumb has always been a quality of life issue.

If you can accommodate their needs, they are not in pain and still able to enjoy life, there's no hurry.

[haele]

2. If he stops eating and hides, it's typically just past the time to let an elderly cat go.

Cats will tend to hide when they're in pain or too weak to function.
If he's still interested in his surroundings, if he's still eating - even if he's a bit creaky - he's probably still expecting to be part of the family. He may even have two to five years before he starts deteriorating. It's when he no longer wants to be part of the family, he drops a significant amount of weight over a few months, he stops grooming himself, and he's constantly off in some corner away from everyone - that is the sign that either something internal is going seriously wrong or he's ready to die of old age.

I've been through this several times before with fur babies, and our current chronically grumpy old girl who can be anywhere from 11 years old to 17 years old - Princess Cat - is starting to show signs that she's only got a few years left herself. As a fur momma, it's a hard thing to contemplate.

Haele

[alarimer]

6. He is 15, almost 16 now.

He continues to lose weight, which is the most troubling thing.

Other than that, though, he seems okay, if a little slower.

[haele]

8. Indoor cats can live up to 20.

All depending on genetics, the environment, and whether they've been indoor or indoor/outdoor. Outdoor living tends to reduce life expectancy in a cat as it takes a bit longer to determine when you need to take one to the vet and some of the agricultural and petroleum chemicals they can be exposed to, but even then, YMMV.

My indoor only boys, littermates that were born two weeks apart in the same clowder of farm cats, lived to be 15 and 17.
They both developed the same aggressive cancer in the bones of their skulls two years apart, probably from the chemicals in the wall to wall industrial floor covering instead of real carpeting that was used in the house we were renting at the time; they liked to sleep on a towel surrounded by all my old socks they'd pull from the drawers under the bed during the day so the dog couldn't bother them.


It's sad to watch the ones you love get older so quickly. But as long as an elderly pet seem to be happy - and you can tell when they're happy - and eating, and interacting with their surroundings, other than the normal physical issues cats have, they're still in good shape.

Haele

[TexasBushwhacker]

13. I had one make it to 22! n/t

[PassingFair]

3. Yup, pain is the indicator.

My cat was pretty sickly, but as long as she could sit on the Lazyboy and
take a swat at the dog when he went past... I could tell she was still having some fun.

[mnhtnbb]

4. When old kitties stop eating and just hunker in place

you know it's time to help them across the Rainbow Bridge.

We had to do it with both Mouse (age 14) first and then his brother, Simba (age 17) several years later.

It's so hard. So sad...tears are just running down my face remembering...but you wlll see it.
You will know.

[alarimer]

5. He's still eating well.

He does continue to lose weight in spite of that, which is why the vet is concerned there might be something else happening besides his other issues.

[hibbing]

7. It's hard

I put my poor little Sophie down after only 12 years. She was going number 2 outside of the litter box, always seemed to be straining. I tried everything the vet had to offer, which didn't help. She was so uncomfortable going to the bathroom it was hard to watch. Even with all that, it was a very difficult thing. I wish you the best.


Peace

[politicat]

9. Ours made it to 18 and 23. With kidney failure.

So... the special food? Eh. It didn't seem to either help or harm our two, except that neither of them found it anything like food. With cats, it's more important that they eat than what they eat. If Fancy Feast is what gets them to the table, then Fancy Feast is the better food. (Or whatever your cat's equivalent of Twinkies and Pringles is.) Since your kitty's losing weight, add calories. Weight loss or anorexia in cats leads to liver damage, and quickly, and liver failure is painful. Sardines in oil (Costco six packs) are excellent for adding fat, if you cat likes fish. Unsalted butter or ghee is another treat. Cats are obligate carnivores, so no grain - except for treats, if your kitty has a favorite cookie (like Pounce or Temptations.) Since he's got hyperthyroidism, his internal thermostat is set high, so he's using a lot more calories. Feed him.

Kidney disease is the natural end of life process for cats. In humans, we evolved for distance running and walking, so our cardiovascular systems are what most often kill us. Cats are desert creatures, so their kidneys are highly adapted to tight water supplies. They can be healthy with 25% function, and can function with as little as 10%. Kidney disease is fortunately not painful for the cats; the best guess is that it feels like a hangover (since hangovers are essentially dehydration.) Subcutaneous fluid supplementation works to alleviate the dehydration, and it's not terribly difficult to do. Your vet can show you. We did it for most of two years with our elder kitty. (Over more than four years, for reasons.) Your cat will tell you if sub-q is worth it for him. Our elder was willing to take sub-q for about 6 months at a time, then would refuse it for a few months. Trust your cat to know what makes him feel better. You know his behavior and how he expresses his preferences; if sub-q makes him feel better, he'll accept it. If it doesn't make him feel better, he'll let you know. Cats do have some concept of cause and effect, so they do have the ability to equate a treatment with feeling better. Ours participated in stem-cell research in her last 5 years, and she was always happy to let her doctor inject her.

We made the decision to put our elder cat on hospice when she was 21 and she completed the active part of the research project. She'd regained some kidney function, and her health improved. She got to eat anything she wanted, we didn't go to the vet unnecessarily, and we stopped sub-q except during a renal crisis. (We'd learned the difference between recoverable renal crisis and full system failure.) She hated pills so we didn't do pills. And she made it another two years and was active, engaged and happy until she had a brain event (which prompted the shot). She ate a lot of sardines in oil, cheeseburgers and Fancy Feast. She talked to us all the time, woke us up demanding breakfast, cuddled, yelled at us when we didn't come to bed when she thought it was time, put herself on our laps regardless of books or computers. It was a good strategy for us and for her. (Our other one, who died at 18, died suddenly.) If your kitty starts withdrawing, hunching, loses appetite, isn't interested in a favored toy or treat... that's the quality of life issue to watch for.

And mostly -- love him. Cherish every day. Delight in the time you have together. Our animals live long, full lives with us. It's not their fault that their clocks run so much faster. And while it is sad for us when the time comes, we make each other's lives better.

[zonkers]

10. When there are more bad days tan good days.

[rug]

11. When the pain can't be stopped.

[hunter]

18. Yeah. Our eldest dog, the most "good dog" I've ever shared this life with...

... is essentially living in hospice now.

She's still happy most of the time and each new day we enjoy together is treasured.

[rug]

19. My dog is 13 and in diapers.

As goofy and loyal as ever.

[Paula Sims]

12. Pay Attention - they'll let you know

In the case of our Missy, she just lost her will to live. She didn't eat, didn't groom, just was "there". The vet confirmed she aged YEARS in a matter of months. For Missy's arthritis pain we gave her shots and daily Prednisone.

In the case of our Gypsy, she didn't quite recover after cancer surgery. She had asthma anyway and couldn't breathe. It was just too hard for her. However, her asthma was so bad that the doctor wanted to put her down at least 2 years prior but we kept medicating her and she seemed to want to play, eat, and interact. He was shocked that we were willing to put in the time, effort, and money.

Trust me - they are smarter and kinder than we are. We are NEVER ready -- they seem to be. That said, it can get pricey so you have to balance that.

Our main vet's wife, also a vet, says to put them down once they have a cancer diagnosis so you'll get differing opinions. Follow your heart and listen to THEM. They will tell you.

Good luck and prayers to you.

Paula

[TuxedoKat]

14. FYI

There's a group for CKD kitties on FB if you're interested. Sounds like he made need sub-Q fluids, if you are willing to administer that. It's not too hard. In the group files they have info for other options for the prescription foods -- low phosphorus ones, etc. Check the files section for everything you need to know about this disease, especially Tanya's page.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/felinecrf/

[alarimer]

15. Thanks. I'll check it out.

We are not doing the fluids yet. His numbers have not changed since the last test two months ago. At this point, I am just trying to feed him as much as he wants in the hopes that he puts on some weight. I'm also giving him canned pumpkin for fiber (not that he's crazy about that).

[TuxedoKat]

16. You're welcome

There are alot of things you can do to help a cat's kidneys and prolong it's life. I've had three cats with this disease. With my current group, two seniors -- don't know their exact ages but most likely (13+ for both), one 8 years, one 5 years and one 1.5 years am doing what I can to keep their kidneys as healthy as possible, including only feeding wet, grain-free canned and raw, probiotics, and various supplements.

[nadine_mn]

17. It's really true that they will let you know - the light dims in their eyes

We had a collie mix who had spinal problems and was on a lot of pain killers. We knew it would be time but neither one of us wanted to be the one to say it. Then one day I saw a picture of her on the refrigerator - there was so much light and joy in her face, and looking at her laying on the floor - that light was gone. She was 13 and had a great life.

Now we have a 15 (almost 16) yr old Lab mix who has the worst hip dysplasia our vet has seen, her arthritis is bad - her hips crunch in an awful way. She is on painkillers, and now acupuncture and laser therapy. But her attitude is insane - she is still super feisty - jumps up on furniture (I mean it has to hurt), barks at the neighborhood everyday, lost her damn shit at the repairmen who recently came by and was damn proud of herself for it. She has to be just in a ton of pain, but she won't take it easy at all (we try to get her to - she still follows me around and gets pissy if I try to sneak away so she can sleep).

We lost our cat earlier this year - he wasn't ready but his body gave out (misdiagnosed as having kidney problems when it was pancreatitis and could have been treated)- that was so hard. I love, love, love our furry companions - but dammit saying goodbye is so hard. On the one hand who am I to say the pain is too much if she is still giving it 100%?

I am so sorry - there is no easy way. Our cat had lost a lot of weight quickly and needed a lot of medication but had lost his appetite so he had a feeding tube inserted. Now - that sounds like end of life decision, but doing lots of research on it, for cats it is something that helps them get better faster and is actually not a last ditch effort. It made it easier to feed him and make sure he got all of his meds and most importantly keep him hydrated. He took to it like a champ - such a brave little guy. Unfortunately, his pancreatitis had gone untreated too long - we were too late to reverse the damage.

Lots of love to you and your kitty

[mythology]

20. In my experience, I never know until after and I can look back

Outside of my last dog who had a tumor on his liver rupture, I think I always waited too long because I couldn't handle saying goodbye.

But what I look for is the same as others have mentioned. Are they still curious and enjoying life? Do they still react the same to people or things they like? It's never easy. It's the one big downside to having pets.