The gay-baiting around here is getting unreal

[Aerows]

http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=view_post&forum=1002&pid=4566345

Thankfully, the jury members realized that, but this is some awful crap.

[In_The_Wind]

1. Wow!

omg ...

[Aerows]

2. I know

I don't know what to say about that.

Did you see the post that came next? All because of a difference of opinion about something that has not a damn thing to do with what that poster dragged in.

[In_The_Wind]

3. Well ...

imo: you are teh hot!

I'll go look at the next post now.

[Skittles]

4. ? missing the context

was it just a bad joke or was there malice involved - weird but I cannot see where that comment was in the thread....is that the right link?

[Aerows]

5. Malice was involved

I know the whole thing is messy, but it was specifically to bait me into getting pissed off because of comments about my sexuality.

[Skittles]

6. I WILL KICK GAY-BAITING ASS

WTF is that all about?

[swimboy]

7. !

[Skittles]

9. HOWDY SWIMBOY!

[Aerows]

10. I don't know

other than to disrupt the conversation, insult the shit out of everyone and try to see if you can get them banned from DU.

That isn't the only attempt in that thread, and there are multiple examples of it from a handful of posters throughout DU if you so much as utter a peep in an NSA thread. You have people encouraging posters to break the TOS, posters goading people and generally doing anything they can to make you lose your temper.

When attacks on my sexuality get brought into play, however, that isn't cool.

[Maedhros]

12. That particular poster really does nothing else but hyperventilate and attack people.

She thinks that aggression and derision comprise effective debate strategies.

So, gay-baiting is par for the course.

[Aerows]

17. I did the best I could

to not violate the TOS, but it mightily pissed me off.

[Maedhros]

18. I put those kind of people on ignore.

If a poster demonstrates that they are here only to sneer, demean and mock, then I figure they have nothing to say that I need to read.

[Aerows]

19. I can't

I guess if I decided to stop volunteering to host I could, but since I love DU, I won't.

[Cleita]

13. Welcome to my world.

The good news is they banned me from their groups. That poster excels in twisting meanings, putting words in your mouth and then playing the victim when you fight back.

[historylovr]

8. Ugh. That was awful. And ...

[Aerows]

11. It's an attempt to get anyone and everyone

banned for discussing anything in the NSA threads. Coordinated? I don't know. What I do know is that there are a handful of people using very low tactics to try to get those opposed to their opinions to lose it so they can get them banned.

[Cleita]

14. I have called them trolls in the past to their face, so I won't do it behind

their backs, however, if you go through the threads, every classic disruption techniques are used.

[MNBrewer]

15. I've had that poster on ignore for a while.

[Aerows]

16. I can't really put anyone on ignore

because I host in GD and LBN.

[theHandpuppet]

20. Glad I missed it

Whatever it was. That particular poster went off on me the other day in a bizarre irrational tirade, purposing twisting my words and then accusing me of being something or other, I couldn't quite figure out what -- a bigot, misogynist, liar, RW troll --take your pick. It was one of the weirdest exchanges I've ever had on DU. I say "exchanges" even though it was pretty much one-sided.

[Aerows]

21. I think I was accused of being a lesbian stalker

Which, of course, I'm naturally going to stalk people I barely know that disagree with me politically, insult me, and then ridicule my sexuality.

God, I was just WAITING for the proper opportunity to ask her to dinner.

[cinnabonbon]

24. Wow, that sounds completely nasty.

I hate confrontations like that. It sucks that it's getting to be a regular occurrence on DU.

[Aerows]

27. My incident

with that poster was ugly. The post got hidden because it was alerted on, but it's just ugliness for the sake of ugliness because you disagree with someone, and/or want to get them banned or at least a post hidden because you punish them to the point where they lose it.

It's not right. I brought it up in ATA, but considering that it has gotten no activity, I'm not optimistic. I guess we should just let people encouraging people to break TOS go on, allow people to insult based upon sexuality and generally use everything in the dirty tricks arsenal to get rid of "those people" remain.

[Fearless]

22. To paraphrase Jon Stewart...

Why do so many anti-gay people think gay people find them irresistibly attractive?!

[Aerows]

30. You have to wonder about that

You act like a complete asshole, threaten a person, then decide they are into you?

[xchrom]

23. i think DU is fairly homophobic -- i think we all know it --

and we are all pretty uncomfortable with that realization.

[cinnabonbon]

25. I think you're right.

Even though it makes me sad to admit it. I wanted better of this place, damnit.

[theHandpuppet]

34. I've never felt that DU was particularly woman-friendly or gay-friendly

Sorry to say. But usually those things go hand in hand. There are times I simply have to take a hiatus from DU (especially the GD forum) because it can get much too stressful and overwhelming trying to fight it all the time.

[Aerows]

28. I'm extremely frustrated

I think I've given a lot of positive things to this community. I've spent my time helping to moderate on DU2, and I've spent it hosting on DU3.

When people are allowed to start lobbing remarks that are clearly designed for no other reason than to be insulting and to personally attack people, it makes me wonder what in the hell I am doing it for. I'm certainly not paid a damn thing.

[theHandpuppet]

31. I sometimes wonder just how deep the support really is

It seems that we've been witness to times here that GLBTs are the first ones to be thrown under the bus. It gets particularly bad during election cycles.

[Behind the Aegis]

32. It isn't very deep with many.

Make no mistake, there are some individuals here who are very supportive of us, come hell or high water. Some aren't even obvious, but I know a real ally when I see one. I can list many of the them. There are also the fair-weathered variety. They support us as long as it doesn't interfere with something else. Then, there are the opportunists; they support us when it suits their needs, usually making a point in order to attack something/someone they don't like. IMO, the "fair-weathered variety" are the most common. The election cycle will show them off quite well. It is actually the reason my partner stopped posting here very early on.

As an aside, would you mind if I PM'ed you?

[theHandpuppet]

35. I haven't decided whether I can stomach being around during the primaries

I know just how bad it can get, especially for women and gays. That's when you find out who are your real allies.

Edited to add.. of course you can PM me.

[Aerows]

36. Thank you, BTA

You are solid, and your support means a lot to me.

[Jesus Malverde]

26. Sometimes the juries don't

On Thu Feb 27, 2014, 11:44 AM an alert was sent on the following post:

Naw, "traitor" isn't going to be it.
http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=view_post&forum=1002&pid=4574574

REASON FOR ALERT

This post is disruptive, hurtful, rude, insensitive, over-the-top, or otherwise inappropriate.

ALERTER'S COMMENTS

I hate to alert on this but using slanderous terms against gay people REALLY bugs me.

You served on a randomly-selected Jury of DU members which reviewed this post. The review was completed at Thu Feb 27, 2014, 11:58 AM, and the Jury voted 2-4 to LEAVE IT.

Juror #1 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: It is not unusual for gay people (round here and elsewhere) to use that description about themselves and each other. How is it offensive in this case but not in others?

http://www.democraticunderground.com/113733796
Juror #2 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: Raven has it right, silly alert.
Juror #3 voted to HIDE IT
Explanation: Strange use of words considering it's not an LGBT issue.
Juror #4 voted to HIDE IT
Explanation: I have to agree with the Alerter. I know that RW websites have already said worse than this. I believe DU member raven mad meant well, but using the word is this context, I don't like it.


Juror #5 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: The poster isn't using slanderous terms against gay people. The poster is saying that the RW haterss will use slanderous terms. There's a difference.
Juror #6 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: The "idiots" saved the day.

Thank you very much for participating in our Jury system, and we hope you will be able to participate again in the future.

[Aerows]

29. I was the alerter on that one

I'll be right up front and center on that one.

[Behind the Aegis]

33. The gay baiting comes in many forms.

It has been going on for awhile, it just hasn't been very obvious. In some cases, it depends on the subject matter at hand.

[Aerows]

37. I think I'm just a target

because I've never hid the fact that I am a lesbian and I host in GD and LBN. It wasn't bad when I was hosting in LBN - 2 days into hosting GD and it has plummeted. I guess if I was less stubborn, I'd give up and just stop hosting in GD.

Maybe I should.

[QC]

38. Bullying in general has long been a very serious problem around here

and this thread in Ask the Administrators explains why.

Anyone who has ever been bullied and gone to an authority figure for help recognizes that response: ignore them and they will stop. It's right up there with "people wouldn't pick on you if you didn't act/look so weird."

DUers have been trying to get the management to address this issue for years. Back in the days of DU2, at least two surveys, one of them posted by Skinner himself, found that many people here (about 2/3 in the official survey) stated that they were sometimes reluctant to participate here because of the bullying. You can't make it much more clear than that, but the same people, for the most part, are still up to the same bullshit.

The sad thing is, most of the ugliness around here is the work of no more than a couple dozen posters who do virtually nothing but bully and stalk other members. It's not like they are otherwise good members who occasionally show their asses. They bring literally nothing good to this place, only snark and slander, and some have been at it since this place opened. They are disruptors by any meaningful definition of that word.

Why are they still here? Because the only people who can do anything about the problem refuse to. Hell, they can't even be bothered to answer your question in ATA.