How to Talk to Kids About Sex and Consent
How to Talk to Kids About Sex and Consent
In the wake of the St. Paul’s School verdict, I want to talk about rape and responsibility.
Rape is not new. Our reaction to it, though, has been evolving. In the last few years, we’ve seen a meaningful shift in the way sexual assault is discussed. That hasn’t happened on its own; the changes are the hard-won victories of a movement largely led by sexual assault survivors. Especially over the last few years, the topic of sexual assault on college campuses has helped catalyze a broader conversation about rape, consent and healthy relationships.
But even as we see progress at many levels—like California’s new affirmative consent law—every year also brings new, ridiculous lows, like politicians talking about “legitimate rape” or attempting to pass laws narrowing sexual assault to “forcible rape.” So even as we make real progress, it’s clear that we have a long way to go.
For parents and teachers, it often can be difficult to approach this subject. But sexual assault and the rape culture that feeds it thrive in the dark of ignorance. Sexual assault survivors are often too ashamed to come forward because of our upside-down culture where the accused is innocent until proven guilty while the survivor is guilty until proven innocent. According to the Justice Department, sexual assault goes unreported 68 percent of the time, in part because of the social pressure and scrutiny put on survivors.
Changing that culture will require a different approach. We can’t be afraid to discuss sexual assault and to help our children—and our students—build values systems around healthy behavior, respect and affirmative consent.
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http://msmagazine.com/blog/2015/09/17/how-to-talk-to-kids-about-sex-and-consent/