Watching Mental Illness Take a Family Member

[xchrom]

http://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2013/09/watching-mental-illness-take-a-family-member/279478/



When “troubled actress” Amanda Bynes recently set fire to her pant leg, it was easy for me to guess what her family felt: relief that she had finally done something that would allow her to get help.

I’ve had to explain to countless friends and relatives lately that you can’t force someone to take medications or see a doctor. Federal and state laws protect the right to remain untreated, unless and until a person becomes a threat to him- or herself, or to another person.

These are the rules of the game my sister plays.

She’s not a celebrity, but her most recent spiral into darkness has been public all the same. Over the past few months her delusions and paranoia have been chronicled in a way that, just a few years ago, only her closest friends and relatives might have seen.

[ejpoeta]

1. I am sorry to hear about your sister.

I struggle with depression myself and wonder why my husband puts up with it. It wasn't until I ended up in the hospital that I learned how to watch for the signs so I can keep it from getting to the point where I can end up back in the hospital. And I know I don't ever want to go back to that place. I at least was honest. Frankly I didn't care at that point. I had given away all of my possessions and had grown despondent. My sister talked me into going up to the hospital. I told them I had thought of hurting myself. I went into extended observation. From there they tried to get me to go upstairs in the psych ward. I was not going for that. So my family involuntarily put me in there. I was so mad at them. I tend to get paranoid when I get really bad, and I thought they were conspiring against me. If it weren't for them I can honestly say I would probably not be here today.

It is a tough place for family members. Watching a person exhibiting self destructive behavior and not being able to do anything about it. But even if you can force someone to get help, you can't help them accept it. At least I wanted it. I just didn't want the pain anymore. And that can end one of two ways. And unfortunately, the family can't control which their loved one takes. I hope your sister gets the help she needs.