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CaliforniaPeggy

(149,588 posts)
Mon Dec 28, 2020, 02:08 AM Dec 2020

From my senior friend who loves jokes: Interesting thoughts about the past year:

1. The dumbest thing I ever bought was a 2020 planner.

2. I was so bored I called Jake from State Farm just to talk to someone. He asked me what I was wearing.

3. 2019: Stay away from negative people. — 2020: Stay away from positive people.

4. The world has turned upside down. Old folks are sneaking out of the house and their kids are yelling at them to stay indoors!

5. This morning I saw a neighbor talking to her dog. It was obvious she thought her dog understood her. I went into my house and told my cat. We laughed a lot.

6. Every few days try your jeans on just to make sure they fit. Pajamas will have you believe all is well in the kingdom.

7. Does anyone know if we can take showers yet or should we just keep washing our hands?

8. This virus has done what no woman has been able to do. Cancel sports, shut down all bars and keep men at home!

9. I never thought the comment, “I wouldn’t touch him/her with a 6-foot pole” would become a national policy, but here we are!

10. I need to practice social distancing from the refrigerator.

11. I hope the weather is good tomorrow for my trip to the Backyard. I’m getting tired of the Living Room.

12. Appropriate analogy. "The curve is flattening so we can start lifting restrictions now” is like saying “The parachute has slowed our rate of descent, so we can take it off now.”

13. Never in a million years could I have imagined I would go up to a bank teller wearing a mask and asking for money.

14. The spread of COVID-19 is based on 2 things:
A. How dense the population is,
B. How dense the population is.

15. I will stay up late this New Year’s Eve. Not to see 2021 come in, but to be sure this year leaves!



28 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
Highlight: NoneDon't highlight anything 5 newestHighlight 5 most recent replies
From my senior friend who loves jokes: Interesting thoughts about the past year: (Original Post) CaliforniaPeggy Dec 2020 OP
My favorite... TigressDem Dec 2020 #1
Your friend should do stand up marybourg Dec 2020 #2
These are all great! dchill Dec 2020 #3
These are golden! sprinkleeninow Dec 2020 #4
Thanks, everybody! I appreciate your great comments! ♥ CaliforniaPeggy Dec 2020 #5
All very funny! ZZenith Dec 2020 #6
$14 is so true. pansypoo53219 Dec 2020 #26
This message was self-deleted by its author ZZenith Dec 2020 #7
Hilarious! ShazzieB Dec 2020 #8
Exceptional collection! intrepidity Dec 2020 #9
Those are SO good!!! MyOwnPeace Dec 2020 #10
Best post of the year randr Dec 2020 #11
Yes the truth properly phrased and contexted leads to comedy StClone Dec 2020 #18
Those are great. Thanks hermetic Dec 2020 #12
Thanks for the chuckle question everything Dec 2020 #13
This guy is a great comic writer. Nitram Dec 2020 #14
Well, first of all, it's a She! And she doesn't write the jokes. CaliforniaPeggy Dec 2020 #15
My fav is Rebl2 Dec 2020 #16
Kick burrowowl Dec 2020 #17
Thanks for these laughs! DeeDeeNY Dec 2020 #19
ALL gold CA Peggy!! benld74 Dec 2020 #20
Gufffawing sorrisa Dec 2020 #21
Chuckles appreciated! czarjak Dec 2020 #22
My favorites in numerical order: BMW2020RT Dec 2020 #23
Thanks, Peggy. Mr.Bill Dec 2020 #24
"I wouldn't touch him/her with a 6-foot pole" OxQQme Dec 2020 #25
5, 12, 13 & 14 thanks housecat Dec 2020 #27
These are great. trof Dec 2020 #28

TigressDem

(5,125 posts)
1. My favorite...
Mon Dec 28, 2020, 02:11 AM
Dec 2020

12. Appropriate analogy. "The curve is flattening so we can start lifting restrictions now” is like saying “The parachute has slowed our rate of descent, so we can take it off now.”



Response to CaliforniaPeggy (Original post)

hermetic

(8,308 posts)
12. Those are great. Thanks
Mon Dec 28, 2020, 01:29 PM
Dec 2020

I've always believed that the best way to defeat something is to laugh at it. And this thing has been a real challenge. So, Huzzah! I say.

question everything

(47,470 posts)
13. Thanks for the chuckle
Mon Dec 28, 2020, 02:05 PM
Dec 2020

I liked this

13. Never in a million years could I have imagined I would go up to a bank teller wearing a mask and asking for money.

CaliforniaPeggy

(149,588 posts)
15. Well, first of all, it's a She! And she doesn't write the jokes.
Mon Dec 28, 2020, 06:20 PM
Dec 2020

Other people either send them to her, or she searches for them herself.

They're usually forwarded to me, so that's my guess.

She does have a great sense of humor!

Rebl2

(13,492 posts)
16. My fav is
Mon Dec 28, 2020, 06:21 PM
Dec 2020

#11. I did that a lot last summer. Unfortunately now it’s winter and tomorrow there will be ice and snow.
Also #’s 13, 14, 15

sorrisa

(2 posts)
21. Gufffawing
Tue Dec 29, 2020, 12:56 PM
Dec 2020

Thank you... truly needed this and will pass them on... how can one even pick the "funniest" !?!
Thanks again and looking forward to more relief in any form I can find it

BMW2020RT

(139 posts)
23. My favorites in numerical order:
Tue Dec 29, 2020, 03:42 PM
Dec 2020

4. My step daughter is constantly calling her mother. Mother is not amused.

6. While I was home with shingles and the virus I put on 6 or 7 pounds.

12


trof

(54,256 posts)
28. These are great.
Tue Dec 29, 2020, 09:27 PM
Dec 2020

I think I love you.

Would you like to go steady?
I mean I know about your husband and all...but jut sorta?

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