Wonderful Easter email from a relative...

[onager]

I had this POS lurking in my mailbox this morning. Such a WONDERFUL Xian wish to receive on Easter! This must be one of the relatives who don't know I'm an atheist. Or a Democrat. Or possibly even that I left South Dumbfuckistan years ago:

In church yesterday, this little old lady in the pew next to me was silently saying a private prayer.

I saw her lips moving and I thought it was so unique that I just had to ask her who she was praying for. What she said was so sweet and sincere that I just had to share it with you:

Dear Father, These past couple of years have been tough....You have taken my
favorite Actor Patrick Swayze,
my favorite actress Elizabeth Taylor,
my favorite Cowboy James Arness,
my favorite athlete Bob Feller,
my favorite singer Lena Horne and
my favorite salesman Billy Mays.

I just wanted you to know that my favorite president is Barack Obama.

In Jesus' name, Amen.

[southernyankeebelle]

1. No offense and she calls herself a christain? What fakes they are. The more they wish him

dead the more god gives him grace and puts his arms around him. I think deep down these fake christains must realize that god has his back.

[freshwest]

6. +1

[LittleCharlie]

2. GANGSTA RAP JESUS

STRAIGHT OUTTA GOLGOTHA
By Chuck Beikert
Adapted from and to the tune of Straight Outta Compton by N.W.A.
Straight outta Golgotha
crazy young Messiah named Hay Zoos
earlier in life I preached the Beatitudes.
Don't cross me off
cause I'm off the cross
sun went black
and my body got hauled off.
two more boys to the left and right of me
took one of them to
paradise with me
angels don't have to
come and get me off the cross
that's how i'm goin out
three days later I'm back and showin out.
Romans start to mumble
empire gonna crumble
mix em up and cook 'em in a pot
like gumbo
goin off on a money changer like that
accusatory finger pointed at the ruling class
so give it up smooth
ain't no tellin when I'll do my next comin' back
move.
here's a burial shroud
to keep you guessin'
they didn't find it in the hole I was buried in.
Easter Bunny and Eggs are cool
but don't forget me and act like a fool
my sandals are open toe...no maybe
I'm keepin' souls outta purgatory daily
yo weekly, monthly, yearly
until them crazy heathen suckers see clearly
That I'm the son of the capital G.O.D.
Boy...you can trust in me.
So when we in your neighborhood
come see us
don't climb a tree and hide
like Zaccheus.
cause J.C. is goin to your house my Brotha
and when I came back boy
I came straight outta Golgotha...

[freshwest]

3. Disown that hateful creature.

[MarianJack]

4. I've seen this shit for the last couple of years.

I always take pleasure in asking them to put george w moron in for me.

PEACE!

[Mz Pip]

5. Her favorite salesman is Billy Mays?

Well, that explains it.

You might ask her what is Christian about wishing for the death of a president. In Jesus' name, too.

[freshwest]

9. Remember when the RW were singing the tune about GWB and God's Will?

This is what they sang about when Bush was put in office to dismiss the godless followers of Gore, who'd they warned the flock to not for, or go to Hell.

Except they didn't believe in verses 6 & 7. Sounded too much like paying taxes to them...

King James Version (KJV)
Romans 13

1Let every soul be subject unto the higher powers. For there is no power but of God: the powers that be are ordained of God.

2Whosoever therefore resisteth the power, resisteth the ordinance of God: and they that resist shall receive to themselves damnation.

3For rulers are not a terror to good works, but to the evil. Wilt thou then not be afraid of the power? do that which is good, and thou shalt have praise of the same:

4For he is the minister of God to thee for good. But if thou do that which is evil, be afraid; for he beareth not the sword in vain: for he is the minister of God, a revenger to execute wrath upon him that doeth evil.

5Wherefore ye must needs be subject, not only for wrath, but also for conscience sake.

6For for this cause pay ye tribute also: for they are God's ministers, attending continually upon this very thing.

7Render therefore to all their dues: tribute to whom tribute is due; custom to whom custom; fear to whom fear; honour to whom honour.

8Owe no man any thing, but to love one another: for he that loveth another hath fulfilled the law.

9For this, Thou shalt not commit adultery, Thou shalt not kill, Thou shalt not steal, Thou shalt not bear false witness, Thou shalt not covet; and if there be any other commandment, it is briefly comprehended in this saying, namely, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.

10Love worketh no ill to his neighbour: therefore love is the fulfilling of the law.

11And that, knowing the time, that now it is high time to awake out of sleep: for now is our salvation nearer than when we believed.

12The night is far spent, the day is at hand: let us therefore cast off the works of darkness, and let us put on the armour of light.

13Let us walk honestly, as in the day; not in rioting and drunkenness, not in chambering and wantonness, not in strife and envying.

14But put ye on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make not provision for the flesh, to fulfil the lusts thereof.

Gosh, this country has gone nuts... Thanks MSM.

[struggle4progress]

7. This tedious little piece has been floating around for years:

... Dear Lord, in the past year you have taken away my favorite actor, Patrick Swayze, my favorite actress, Farrah Fawcett, my favorite musician, Michael Jackson, my favorite salesman, Billie Mays, and my favorite athlete, Chris Henry. I just wanted to let you know..... my favorite president is Barack Obama. Amen ...

http://message.snopes.com/showthread.php?t=56786

[Skittles]

8. those folk are SICK

seriously, they are fucking SICK

[zbdent]

10. just reply back

"I agree with most of your choices. You're my favorite person, and in my prayers ..."

[bongbong]

11. Here's your reply....

Send this to the wingnut:

"It seems God is answering your prayer about Obama being your favorite, because the latest polls show him winning over King Flip-Flopp R-Money by at least 10 points!"

As Liberals know, the only thing wingnuts care about is winning (who cares about policy? ) and so this kind of thing REALLY frosts their cake.

[lunasun]

12. Block / label Spam you never have to get steamed again

Had someone I was doing business with start sending me crap

Spammed /blocked whatever and lost my business- keeps sending me stuff in the sanil mail and phone messages but they have already been replaced by someone else who is more professional and at the very least keeps these thoughts out of my face.

As far as family - remember it can be the ultimate F word IMO