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Thu Jan 14, 2016, 12:20 PM

Christian Preacher: I Moved Clouds and Stopped a Typhoon Because “I Have Authority Over the Weather”



Christian Preacher Cindy Jacobs tells a lot of tales.

There’s the story of how she helped a woman grow three inches instantaneously, and the one where she turned metal into bone, and the one where she blamed the death of blackbirds on the repeal of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.

Basically, she’ll tell any lie to further the word of God. And her followers just accept it all because I guess they haven’t gotten to the part of the Bible with all those pesky Commandments.

The latest lie involves how she commanded the clouds to go away during a video shoot for Pat Robertson‘s The 700 Club

… [A friend] came to me and said, “Cindy, do something!” This is what my friends do to me! “Do something!” And what he meant was “Command the clouds to go away!”

I said, “No problem.” I read that in the book, right? I have authority over the weather, right?…

So I did, I just put my hands up… I lifted my hands and I said these simple words: “In the name of Jesus, I command this cloud layer to dissipate.”

Now doesn’t that seem weird?

You know what happened? Within a half an hour, NO MORE CLOUDS! Amen? And they got the shoot.


http://www.patheos.com/blogs/friendlyatheist/2016/01/13/christian-preacher-i-moved-clouds-and-stopped-a-typhoon-because-i-have-authority-over-the-weather/


Seems legit. And certainly no more absurd, irrational, or implausible than any of the many other beliefs found in religion.

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Response to cleanhippie (Original post)

Thu Jan 14, 2016, 12:23 PM

1. If she actually believes this shit she's as mad as a box of frogs.

When you talk to God you're praying; when God talks to you you're psychotic.

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Response to The Velveteen Ocelot (Reply #1)

Thu Jan 14, 2016, 12:27 PM

3. Do you feel the same about those that believe wine and crackers turn into blood and flesh...

that dead people come back to life....

From where I stand, it all looks equally absurd.

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Response to cleanhippie (Reply #3)

Thu Jan 14, 2016, 12:42 PM

6. I agree that the concept of transubstantiation is pretty weird

but where this character has really gone over the edge is that she claims (or believes) that she, personally, can actually cause "miraculous" things to happen. Transubstantiation and resurrection and the other conventional religious beliefs are things that supposedly occur because God (or whoever is said to be in charge) makes them happen directly. Whether just believing such things is evidence of mental disturbance as opposed to mere gullibility would be tough to prove. But when somebody claims they actually did God-like things, like make someone grow three inches instantaneously, turn metal into bone and made clouds dissipate, now we are really in loon territory.

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Response to The Velveteen Ocelot (Reply #6)

Thu Jan 14, 2016, 01:18 PM

7. Most believers believe that prayer actually works.

Jist because she is more specific doesn't mean she's any more delusional.
I agree that this person is WAY more over the top than most, but they're all over the top as far as I can tell.

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Response to The Velveteen Ocelot (Reply #6)

Thu Jan 14, 2016, 02:09 PM

9. “In the name of Jesus, I command this cloud layer to dissipate.”

Kinda sounds like she's indicating it happened because of Jesus.

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Response to cleanhippie (Original post)

Thu Jan 14, 2016, 12:25 PM

2. Nonsense.

Only Poseidon can do that.

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Response to cleanhippie (Original post)

Thu Jan 14, 2016, 12:30 PM

4. And weather-satellites and cloud-radar documented that. Right? Right?

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Response to cleanhippie (Original post)

Thu Jan 14, 2016, 12:38 PM

5. Whoa! Cool! As an amateur astronomer I need to get in touch with this lady.

 

No more cloudy nights. Yes!

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Response to cleanhippie (Original post)

Thu Jan 14, 2016, 01:48 PM

8. She even made the tides recede!

It took the better part of a day, but she commanded it, and lo, it came to pass!

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Response to cleanhippie (Original post)

Thu Jan 14, 2016, 02:37 PM

10. Itsallbullshititsallbullshititsallbullhititsallbullshit...!!!

Phew!

I feel better now.

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Response to cleanhippie (Original post)

Thu Jan 14, 2016, 05:06 PM

11. There actually is quite a difference in this movement, The New Apostolic Reformation.

 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/New_Apostolic_Reformation

Her group in particular, Generals International, is more unhinged.

http://www.generals.org/home/

Now I know you posted this article just so you can say they're all alike (who else says that?), but your comment is taking a piss on facts.

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