A Common-Sense Case for a New Polytheism

[MineralMan]

Last edited Wed Oct 25, 2017, 01:11 PM - Edit history (1)

Apparently humans have a tendency to want to worship some sort of higher power, since they can't figure out lots of things and need some entity to ask for stuff they don't have and don't have time to work for. You know, plenty of food and money, earthquake and storm prevention, death to your enemies, a happy sex life, and other such things that would otherwise be beyond our feeble powers.

That's a lot to ask of just one deity, I think. He or She is probably busy as the dickens with all those responsibilities and probably doesn't have time to handle them all without getting irritated, annoyed and grumpy. Maybe polytheistic pagan religions, like those of the Greeks and Romans, make more sense. They offer specialized deities for all occasions. You know...if you want some decent vintages from the vines, go to Dionysus's temple and make an offering to entice that deity into seeing to it that the grapes are plentiful and sweet. Or, if there's some war going on, drop in at the Mars temple, and lay something down to ensure that your enemies die miserable deaths.

Having problems in the bedroom? Well, leave an offering for Eros, and Tada! Like that. Yeah, specialized gods for every occasion makes a lot more sense than just one jack-of-all-trades deity who probably doesn't have time for petty requests like yours. You could also pick your favorite deity and focus on worshiping him or her, knowing that he or she will put in a good word for you with the other deities. It's much simpler, and you could get on with your life and not really worry so much about that stuff.

A new paganism, with a pantheon of useful deities, just seems like a great idea that should be given a fresh try. Those who don't really believe in deities could simply ignore them all as easily as ignoring one, really, too. I think it's a win-win situation all around.

Edit to add: For those who don't realize it, my post is tongue-in-cheek in nature.

[Nay]

1. More than one person is advocating for this very thing -- a new, earth- and eco-based

religion that has one or more gods, a coherent philosophy that does not include destruction of the planet we live on, etc.

John Michael Greer (an Archdruid) is one of them. He's been posting about it for years. I hope one of the decent religions catches on.

[MineralMan]

2. Cool. I doubt it will catch on, though. Christianity is a religion of convenience.

Pagan polytheism isn't, really. Christianity has convenient shortcuts to afterlife issues. Pagan religions don't.

My proposal was, in short, completely tongue-in-cheek.

[Nay]

3. I know you were playing with us a bit -- but who knows? Some day we'll have to admit to

ourselves that the same old shit isn't working anymore. It'll be after I'm dead, that's for sure.

[MineralMan]

5. Personally, I don't thing religion is needed at all.

A common ethical compass is all that's required. The rest is just mythology and answers to questions like "How'd all this crap get here?" "What happens when I die?"

The answers are "Complex natural phenomena you can learn about." and "Nothing. You just die. Live well."

Millions and millions of people find those answers perfectly acceptable, because they're true and observable.

Religion is a waste of time and thought, in my opinion.

[Nay]

14. Oh, I personally agree. I've been an atheist since I was a small child. Religion just

didn't 'stick' to me. For a lot of other folks, well, it seems to be something they need or want. I can't explain it since I'm the exact opposite. I do think that if a society (like some Nordic countries) starts to become 40% or 50% atheist, then most of the rest of the society will go along. But it'll take generations.

[Act_of_Reparation]

4. Pagans had the better parties, though.

[MineralMan]

6. Absolutely. Better stories, too.

Heck, some of the immortals came down and reproduced with humans, even. Of course, that happened in Christianity, too, so there is that in common.

[marylandblue]

7. God is strictly monogamous and had only one kid

I like the gods who fool around all the time. I hope that someday Venus or Athena will decide I'm good source material for making a demigod. Not likely, I know, but I keep the back door unlocked at night just in case.

[Act_of_Reparation]

10. Zeus made his kids the old fashioned way.

Whatever God did, we are to believe it didn't go all the way.

If you catch my meaning.

[MineralMan]

11. Yah, well, Mary got knocked up.

And there it is. The "Holy Spirit" came to her and she turned up pregnant. The actual incident isn't described with any detail, and the Bible is full of euphemisms, anyhow. "Noah 'knew' his wife." People had "their nakedness uncovered." Lot's daughters "lay" with their father. There aren't a lot of detailed descriptions of baby-making in the Bible, really.

Mary got knocked up. That's clear enough. Immortals knocking up mortals. It happened fairly often in Greek and Roman mythology. No details were offered there, either. They didn't want their impressionable youths reading those details and getting ideas, I guess.

[Act_of_Reparation]

12. Yeah, but I'm pretty sure it wasn't God doing the knocking.

The pool boy, the UPS guy, the gardener... anyone but that mute dullard carpenter to whom she'd been sold like fucking chattel.

[MineralMan]

13. I don't know. I'm just going by the reported account of

what happened. Supposedly it was one aspect of the deity that knocked Mary up to create another aspect of the deity. Mythology often makes little sense, really.

[guillaumeb]

17. Like Zeus made Diana?

Interesting.

[Act_of_Reparation]

19. And by "made", you mean "fucked Leto", right?

Not as interesting as you'd think.

[guillaumeb]

20. And then we have Athena.

[Act_of_Reparation]

21. You do realize we're talking about the progeny of divine and mortal coupling, right?

I only ask because this is the second time you've brought a full-blooded deity into the conversation.

Think Heracles.

[AtheistCrusader]

9. All the pagans I know, are fucking awesome people.

Literally every single one.

[AtheistCrusader]

8. This sort of thing has been attempted many times and in many ways.

A lot of naturalistic/pagan/earth type religions have been forcibly converted or exterminated over the years.

Allowing them to exist at all is about as much courtesy as I expect from the mainstream religions on this planet.

[Iggo]

15. A thousand times zero is zero. (n/t)

[guillaumeb]

16. Who is Polly?

And why should anyone worship Polly?

[MineralMan]

18. Poly-

I don't know anyone named Poly.