Religion
Related: About this forumWhen your child resigns from Mormonism
From the article:
She didnt believe in the church anymore. Shed tried to go to her friends church for a few weeks, but she just couldnt. She didnt believe in God. She was an atheist.....
....... your children just keep telling you more and more things you cant tell them to do. They are who they are and they let you know in small and big ways every moment that you have not created a new version of yourself. They dont exist in order for you to redo your own life and get things right.
Yes, it is a rejection. But it is also a new creation. Her life. Her world. Her terms. And my job is to embrace all of those parts of her, even this one that is difficult.
To read more:
https://religionnews.com/2018/02/27/when-your-child-resigns-from-mormonism/
Speaking as a parent, I understand the author's feelings and agree with the conclusion that our role as parents is partly a custodial one, but only until the child is grown enough to make decisions. And children are not copies of us, they are others. We must respect them and their decisions.
yallerdawg
(16,104 posts)when it comes to faith, belief and religion can be dispelled by every adult - including the vast majority of Atheists!
"When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things." - 1 Corinthians 13:11
Voltaire2
(12,629 posts)the idiocy of religion.
yallerdawg
(16,104 posts)Like billions of others.
marylandblue
(12,344 posts)Which only the few with eyes to see can understand.
edhopper
(33,212 posts)but I have heard that from so many hard core Christians and it makes me throw up in my mouth.
It is such a condescending attitude. It comes from such surety about who God is and what God wants.
guillaumeb
(42,641 posts)and substituted atheism for the word religion, as happens in China to some Chinese youth, what would your response be?
By calling religion idiocy you are defaming every believer and calling them idiots. Is this not a divisive group attack?
AtheistCrusader
(33,982 posts)and vice versa.
trotsky
(49,533 posts)So with regards to religious indoctrination, why isn't that courtesy extended to children in the first place?
guillaumeb
(42,641 posts)If you are a parent, do you or did you guide your own children?
All socialization is indoctrination.
trotsky
(49,533 posts)No it isn't.
I'm just wondering why you think it's OK to teach a child a religion before they are old enough to question it.
guillaumeb
(42,641 posts)Indoctrination is a more loaded term.
trotsky
(49,533 posts)We've been through this before. In other news, have you heard from your good friend rug lately?
guillaumeb
(42,641 posts)trotsky
(49,533 posts)Have a good weekend, you outstanding fine Christian! You go right on showing what it is you believe your religion is all about!
guillaumeb
(42,641 posts)When I attain perfection, perhaps I shall judge also.
trotsky
(49,533 posts)And it doesn't take keen observational powers to see it.
If only Christians could behave like they *think* their religion teaches. Or perhaps most of them think their religion is OK with hypocrisy - maybe that explains it. Who knows.
guillaumeb
(42,641 posts)trotsky
(49,533 posts)How sad.
guillaumeb
(42,641 posts)And not what I said or implied. Read it again.
trotsky
(49,533 posts)It's always someone else's fault when you aren't able to properly express yourself.
Praise unto you for continuing to interact with pitiful morons like me who find it so difficult to parse your wonderfully worded posts.
guillaumeb
(42,641 posts)Remove the beam...etc. Apply that admonition to what you wrote.
trotsky
(49,533 posts)Perhaps YOU should apply it, then.
I'm going to continue to call out hypocrisy when I see it. Please proceed.
guillaumeb
(42,641 posts)But sometimes when a person is so busy pointing out the hypocrisy of others, they fail to notice their own failings.
trotsky
(49,533 posts)And it doesn't excuse your hypocritical behavior, as you are attempting to do.
What does it mean to you to be a Christian, gil?
guillaumeb
(42,641 posts)trotsky
(49,533 posts)You go on behaving exactly like you think a Christian should. That's all I ask.
AtheistCrusader
(33,982 posts)guillaumeb
(42,641 posts)AtheistCrusader
(33,982 posts)redstatebluegirl
(12,264 posts)We were raised in the Catholic Church but went with Mom once in a while to the Presbyterian. My Mom was adamant that we study various religions and make a decision for ourselves, they said they would support us. Dad not as much as Mom, I think he resented the fact that Mom gave us a choice, he never had one, he was rounded up and taken to Church twice a week and then forced to go to Catholic school. My brother is a practicing Catholic, my sister is Presbyterian and I am the black sheep Unitarian.
I think kids need to find their own spiritual path, whatever that may be, and even if that means no belief. Forcing kids to believe certain ways almost always backfires on you in some way or another.
Mariana
(14,849 posts)works, most of the time. Few children who are indoctrinated into religion early in life deviate from the religion of their parents when they are grown. Children of Christians, for example, may pick different flavors of Christianity, but they tend to remain Christian. They aren't likely to become Muslim, or Hindu, or Santerian, or atheist.
guillaumeb
(42,641 posts)Cartoonist
(7,298 posts)guillaumeb
(42,641 posts)Trump at 72 is far less mature than were my children at 10.
And you?
Act_of_Reparation
(9,116 posts)The entire article is about the author trying to overcome their own inflamed sense of aggrievement. She gives no indication that she understands, or that she wants to understand, why her daughter would leave the church. In the end, she isn't dealing with her feelings so much as she is trying to ignore or deny them. That doesn't usually work.
What does work, I think, is empathy.
My best friend is Catholic. He works with the Church in Japan. For a while, he was entertaining the idea of joining the priesthood. Despite our obvious differences with respect to religion, and the Roman Catholic Church in particular, we've been more or less inseparable since we were in middle school. We still manage to see each other at least once a year.
Seem an unlikely friendship?
It works because he doesn't just accept my position, he understands it. He's not convinced my position is correct, but he understands completely how I got there, and he understands completely how I feel about being there. He's not stifling some personal upset that I left the church while he stayed. He genuinely does not seem to be upset at all.
I am glad the author isn't disowning or ostracizing her child, as sometimes happens to young atheists who come clean to their families. I am glad she wants to continue having a relationship with her child, and I'm sure her child is glad for that as well. But I would advise her to take it a step further, to try empathizing with her daughter. To try to understand why she made the decisions she did.
guillaumeb
(42,641 posts)I understand the thought processes that led them to their conclusion, or the tentative conclusion of one who seems more agnostic than atheist.
I also have some friends and relatives who are politically conservative. The same applies as what I wrotte above.
And I thought your reply was outstanding, especially the focus on empathy.
AtheistCrusader
(33,982 posts)How many times does it have to be explained to you?