If You Go to a Religious Memorial Day Service, Remember My Father's Words

[MineralMan]

My father is 93 years old, a WWII B-17 pilot, and an atheist. Ten years ago, he attended a Memorial Day ceremony at the local cemetery in his small town. As the former fire chief in that community, he is a well-recognized figure there. Many WWII miltary veterans are buried in that cemetery, and my father knew almost all of them.

As such ceremonies go, it had a religious component. Really, a major religious component. A local minister, from an evangelical church in the community, gave the main address at the ceremony. Very quickly, he turned away from speaking about the service and sacrifice of military people and launched into a diatribe against liberal politics, gays, and abortion. After a couple of minutes of this, my father had had enough and rose to his feet. In his best command voice, he interrupted the minister:

"That is not why we are gathered here. We are here to commemorate the sacrifices of people who served in this nation's wars. Either speak about that or sit down and shut up." Then, my father sat down again.

Applause broke out after my Dad spoke. The minister stammered for a second and turned away and left the podium. There was anger on his face, but he said nothing more. The next thing on the program replaced him. In the years that followed, the religious component of those ceremonies has been reduced to an invocation and a benediction, with community leaders or veterans giving the main address. The offending minister has never been asked to return.

This is why religion fails. It does not understand its reason for being here. All too often, it needs to get back to basics, or sit down and shut up.

[monmouth4]

1. What a treasure your father is. Wish I could have heard him...n/t

[MineralMan]

2. Yah, he is. He's a quiet guy, but speaks up when he needs to.

And when he does, people listen to him. He's a great old guy!

[Scruffy1]

3. Great story.

Sounds like your father was a great man. I just wish the media would tell these assholes the same thing.

[Mariana]

5. Why is it the media's responsibility, or that of MineralMan's atheist dad

to stand up to hateful Christian preachers like that asshole minister, and tell them to stop spreading their hate and lies? Why aren't progressive and moderate Christians doing it?

[MineralMan]

8. I think most people are too timid to speak out. Pastors

are something like authority figures to many people. They won't call them out for doing the wrong thing. We are typically brought up and trained not to rock the boat. My Dad, on the other hand, always taught me to make sure I'm right, and then not to be afraid to insist that people do the right thing. It's rare, today, for individuals to stand up for what is right. It shouldn't be. I've always tried to do that, which has gotten me in some hot water occasionally. Still, if nobody speaks up, people will just continue to take advantage of the silence.

[Mariana]

11. Funny how sometimes, Christians find the will to speak up

when a preacher says something they consider really offensive:

https://www.npr.org/sections/thetwo-way/2017/09/05/548708431/lee-relative-who-denounced-white-supremacy-resigns-as-pastor-of-n-c-church

[MineralMan]

12. Yes, indeed.

[Victor_c3]

4. I was at a Memorial Day service with my wife in Delaware

I’m a vet suffering from severe PTSD and I personally lost 5 Soldiers under my command and I personally knew and was good friends with another 2 who were killed and was an acquaintance of 5 more guys who served in my unit. Memorial Day is one of my “crazy” days and it is usually very emotional and rough for me.

Anyways, we were at a major Memorial Day service in Delaware. A bunch of various state reps and the federal house and senate reps were there. There was a crowd of about 100 people. One of the politicians who spoke was spot on with his speech about remembering those who were lost in war. The rest were all over the place, focused on politics, and barely mentioned the loss associated with Memorial Day.

At the end of the ceremony, while everyone was still seated and listening, my wife stood up and really laid into the politicians who used Memorial Day as an opportunity to preach their partisan politics! Everyone in the audience was shocked and dumbfounded and the politicians in the front slinked away in shame (with the exception of the one guy who gave a great speech). I was so proud of her!

I wish I remembered his name, but the one politician who gave a great speech was also their with his 5-year-old son. I ran into the guy and his son a few other times at various veteran events and this guy really lives what the appreciation of those who serve our country that he preaches. I spoke with him and he always brought his son with him to teach him the value of service to your community and nation. Again, I really wish I remembered his name. He was a hell of a man.

Good for your father!! Memorial shouldn’t have shit to do with politics other than reminding politicians of the lives at stake with their decisions. It needs to be a National day of sorrow and remembersnce.

[MineralMan]

6. Thanks for sharing your story. I'm a veteran, too, but

not a combat veteran. I was nowhere near Vietnam during my time in the USAF.

[Victor_c3]

7. To be honest, combat is over rated

I wouldn’t wish that experience on anyone other than the politicians that send us to war.

However, I have a mixed bag of feelings associated with it. I have a lot of guilt surrounding my service, but at the same time I’m proud of the fact that I served our country and I know what I’m made of - I can do and deal with anything. At the same time, it has also destroyed my life and has indirectly had a hugely negative impact on my wife and kids. Then again, it has made me a kinder and more understanding person...

[sprinkleeninow]

9. I hesitated replying, adding my 0.25 (due to inflation😄).

Husband attended funeral of person on his work staff whose nephew was killed by an IED last year or mb in 2016. Preacher/minister said some words in the eulogy about the soldier, then proceeded to go on and on about being saved....

It was upsetting to say the least.

Not hardly appropriate during a funeral service.

Yeah, mention it in an abbreviated way if you get that itch to do it, but it upset my husband in the overly done content and manner.

[MineralMan]

10. For some ministers and pastors, they see any occasion when they speak

as an opportunity to proselytize. People attend funerals for many reasons. People of all beliefs and of no belief at all. It is always inappropriate to proselytize at a funeral. I attend more funerals these days that I would wish. As I have moved into my 70s, people I know are more often the "guest of honor" at their own funeral.

I'm there to honor the person I know. I'll gladly sit through a religious funeral, but I sure don't want to hear evangelistic nonsense. I won't walk out. I won't interrupt, but I'll still be annoyed. I've even seen it happen at weddings, where some evangelical pastor goes off subject and attempts to convert the audience to his or her brand of Christianity. I have always found such behavior to be offensive.

I'm certain that it's totally ineffective, besides.

[sprinkleeninow]

13. You know I'm Eastern Orthodox since 40 days on earth.

Not that this credential makes me perfectly wonderful.

Our Faith does not practice an in-your-face method of evangelizing. We make a statement with our community presence quietly and without gregarious prosetylizing.

On the other hand, mb with Greek festivals in part! 😋😉

[MineralMan]

16. Yes. No worries.

[guillaumeb]

14. The ending failed.

Interesting anecdote.

[MineralMan]

15. You have convinced yourself.

[guillaumeb]

17. Now where have I read that reply before?

It is a favorite of mine.

[MineralMan]

18. I'm just holding up a mirror for you.

What point is there in stepping into a thread like this one, just to snark? Can you leave no thread alone without leaving a bad smell behind?

[Mariana]

19. The show must go on.

Can't let a single thread go by, lest his gaggle of groupies stop sending him numerous personal messages asking him to continue doing what he's doing, and praising his efforts here.

You'd think said groupies would get bored after awhile, watching the same old show over and over and over again, but I suppose some people are very easily entertained.

[MineralMan]

20. Probably the thing that bothers me the most is the

practice of staying away from the group all week and then coming in and dropping smelly turds into whatever threads have been started during that absence. This particular thread has received an unusually large number of recommendations, most from people who do not normally post in this group.

I find it disheartening to see a one sentence dismissal of what I wrote as the only contribution to the thread from an individual. Not surprising. Just disheartening.

Such actions do nothing to promote discussion of Religion, which is supposed to be the mission of this group.

[guillaumeb]

21. Many things about many posts bother me.

Sometimes it is the simplistic view expressed, or the tendency to dismiss religionists as engaging in simplistic thinking. I find that to be an obstacle to actual dialogue.

[MineralMan]

22. Yes, we know. You never fail to point such things out.

Even when they have no relevance to the thread. I cannot remember every having any real dialogue with you, frankly.

[guillaumeb]

23. Given that they are there to point out,

and given how often they are seen, if you miss the relevance I would suggest you revisit my posts about the 11th Commandment.

[MineralMan]

24. ..

[guillaumeb]

25. Much better. eom

[redwitch]

26. Good for him!

I’d have given him a standing ovation!

[MineralMan]

27. He's a great old guy.

I just got off the phone with him and my mother. We talk daily, since I'm so far away from them. At 93, they're remarkably lively, I think. Thanks!

[ollie10]

28. I thank everyone who has served

As well as the families of those who made the ultimate sacrifice.

[The Genealogist]

29. I'm glad your father said something

I think many of these evangelical clergypeople assume everyone at an event like you described are of the same conservative ilk they are, so they spew their crap. Why is it not enough to honor those who gave their lives for their country?

[Lordquinton]

30. What many theists don't get is what you are saying here

Religion gets inserted into everything, and they don't see it as an issue. It's what really gets spoken about the most here, but since discussion isn't their goal, it gets lost.

Thanks for bringing the focus back around.