For some reason, the RNC thinks I'm one of them, and look at what they want to know LOL!!!

[DFW]

I guess they think everyone who has a residence in an upscale part of Texas must be one of them, or something. Dallas sends me over my mail from the States once a week, and look what was in there this time:

They Republican National Committee just sent me a survey of my presidential preferences for 2016. They asked me to check off "Strongly Favorable, Favorable, Unclear/No opinion, Unfavorable or Strongly Unfavorable"

Now look at the choices:
Kelly Ayottte
Haley Barbour
Joun Bolton
Jeb Bush
Herman Cain
Ben Carson
Chris Christie
Ted Cruz
Mitch Danieals
Newt Gingrich
Nikki Haley
Mike Huckabee
Bobby Jindal
John Kasich
Peter King
Susana Martinez
Sarah Palin
Rand Paul
Ron Paul
Tim Pawlenty
Mike Pence
Rick Perry
Rob Portman
Condoleezza Rice
Marco Rubio
Paul Ryan
Brian Sandoval
Rick Santorum
Tim Scott
John Thune
Scott Walker
Allen West
or (write-in candidate)

I wanted to write-in Alexander Throttlebottom as my choice, and then ask them in my clever new disguise as a Republican....."HOLY SHIT PEOPLE ARE WE THIS DESPERATE?????"

But why bother? Let them continue to think there is a serious candidate in there somewhere. It's not our duty to shed the cold harsh light of reality upon them.

[TreasonousBastard]

1. Obviously, you send it back...

ranking the craziest assholes as "strongly favorable". Then work up to the close to sane as highly unfavorable.

Confuse the bastids.

The hard part is finding the less insane assholes to diss.

[OregonBlue]

2. My exact thought. Rate the ones that are somewhat sane as very unfavorable and rate the ones that

batshit crazy as strongly favorable. They'll know for sure that you're a real Republican.

[Curmudgeoness]

9. I agree.

And then write in Ann Coulter.

And where did Bachmann go? Or did I just miss it.

[Bernardo de La Paz]

13. Bachmann is under investigation

Presidential campaign finance investigation

Bachmann is under investigation by the House Ethics Committee, the Federal Election Commission, the Iowa Senate Ethics Committee, the Urbandale Police Department and the Federal Bureau of Investigation because of alleged campaign finance violations in her 2012 campaign for President.[156][157]

It is alleged that members of her staff made under-the-table payments, that funds were illegally transferred from her leadership PAC to pay consultants for her presidential campaign and that hidden payments were made to Iowa State Senator Kent Sorenson.[158][159]

Additionally, a lawsuit has been filed alleging that Bachmann and several former staffers stole and misused an Iowa homeschool group's e-mail distribution list. The trial, Heki v. Bachmann, has been set for May 14, 2014.[160]

On July 26, 2013, the House Ethics Committee announced they were conducting a full investigation of Bachmann, saying that they had received a referral from the Office of Congressional Ethics.[161][162]
Retirement

On May 29, 2013, Bachmann announced that she would not seek re-election to her Congressional seat in 2014.[11] Bachmann stated in an interview with Fox News in June 2013 that she was "not going silent," and would remain involved in politics. She did not rule out a future run for office, or even for the White House.[163] She also said that probes into her campaign finance and the narrow margin of victory for her election were not a part of her decision against seeking re-election.[164]

-- Wikipedia

[Curmudgeoness]

14. Ah, so they do have ethics.

They are not going to just blame the Democrats and stick with her.

Thanks, I don't pay enough attention to all the melodrama.

[Bernardo de La Paz]

12. +1

Rate Allen West and Sarah Palin high. Lots of other names I don't recognize.

[SwankyXomb]

3. That is one thoroughly Krowded Klown Kar.

[bahrbearian]

4. I'd like to see all of them on stage in a Debate.

[cojoel]

6. I would prefer a cage

whether they debate isn't so important.

[progressoid]

5. So, that's like two "moderates"?

WOW

[babylonsister]

7. They don't have a clue, do they. NO ONE!! The

choices are too depressing.

[Rozlee]

8. The only half way sane Republican

is Jon Huntsman and they don't even have him listed. I guess he lacks the main pre-requisites, which are to howl at the moon and froth at the mouth.

[Leith]

15. Well, Pawlenty and Dr. Carson Aren't So Bad

but Tim isn't exactly Mr. Excitement.

Ben should know better than get deeply into politics, in spite of the "Draft Ben Carson" movement. THAT tells me that his followers are crazy, not him necessarily.

It looks like Jon Huntsman is persona non grata with the Repubs. Too bad - he's the only one that could have given Obama a fight.

I like their list. It just show how strong the crazy is with them.

[Rozlee]

21. The best that Repubicans have nowadays is still pretty awful.

The statesman-like Republicans like Eisenhower have gone the way of the dinosaur. They've strained their party down to its most toxic sludge.

[treestar]

10. They have such a long list!

Too bad for them it is a list of idiots.

[Yo_Mama_Been_Loggin]

11. Enough nuts there to start a concession stand.

[Submariner]

16. They forgot centerfold Scottie Brown (R-carpetbagger)

who when he loses his New Hampshire senate race will be looking for something else to run in. The presidency? Scottie pocket tweets #Bqhatevwr

[tarheelsunc]

17. I give them all "Strongly Favorable." I'd love to see all 32 debate so I can decide. eom

[DFW]

18. Oh, I WOULD like to fill it out and send it back. One problem

They were smart enough to have my name and address in print on the form--it's personalized.


Someone in my part of Dallas that sends the form in with no contribution is suspicious enough, but when they ran my name and saw a long string of contributions to Bernie Sanders, Bobby Kennedy's environmental initiatives, the Vermont Food Bank, Elizabeth Warren's Senate campaign, Wendy Davis' Gubernatorial campaign, etc., my cover would risk being quickly and irrevocably blown. Then I might not get these things any more, and I wouldn't have this kind of entertainment any longer.

Who knew that they were THIS desperate to find a candidate in 2016? Best news I had all day.

As they saw with Romney, "all the Kochs' money and all the Kochs' men couldn't put their campaign together again..."

[MillennialDem]

19. Is it business reply postage paid return envelope? If so stuff that baby with sheet lead and send

it back blank. Take your name off of it so they can receive more sheet lead deliveries from you in the future.

[DFW]

22. The German postal service is usually unimpressed by "no postage necessary...."

"....if mailed in the United States."

Not a bad idea, though, for those in the States with an ample supply of sheet lead (we're fresh out).

[MillennialDem]

24. Damn on being in Germany. Could use other stuff besides sheet lead. Sand is free :p

[DFW]

25. Sand would work.

I was thinking more like sulfur. I won't be back in the USA before July (barring unforeseen circumstances), and I'm sure I'll get more of this junk in the mail.

"Survey, time sensitive!--Tell us how YOU found out that Jesus loves only Republicans?"

And similarly important themes vital to the security of the United States.......

[MillennialDem]

26. Bring it back with you and send it back to them when you are state side.

[sofa king]

30. I think it was a DU reader long ago...

...pointed out that Republican paid-post return envelopes were a great way to dispose of used kitty litter.

However, I'm pretty sure that falls beyond the boundaries of good taste and possibly also the law.

[MillennialDem]

32. Sure, animal products/food/waste in the mail is a no go unless properly packaged. General junk is

not illegal to send in business reply envelopes though!

[mazzarro]

20. I will suggest you write-in Dick Cheney -- definitely batshit crazy sob. -- n/t

[DFW]

23. Normally, I'd say there would be no chance of being taken seriously, however.....

With an insane asylum like the list they provided, they'd probably ask themselves how they could possibly have neglected to include him.

[sofa king]

31. You know, that's not a bad idea.

Tossing around Cheney's name in public would eventually invite someone to point out that the former Vice President is currently unable to serve as President because of his dual-citizenship with Dubai... so that he could soak up all that cash Halliburton paid him while he was Vice President.

[Wounded Bear]

27. Send in the clowns...

[TeamPooka]

28. Write in vote - Hedly Lamarr. nt

[DFW]

29. They'd probably just assume I was another illiterate Republican

They'd assume I meant Lamar Alexander and make the "correction" to help me out.

Most of them probably think "Mel Brooks" is the name of an upscale Chicago suburb.