She’s (Rarely) the Boss

[seabeyond]

“We hold ourselves back in ways both big and small, by lacking self-confidence, by not raising our hands, and by pulling back when we should be leaning in,” Sandberg writes in the book, called “Lean In.”

“We internalize the negative messages we get throughout our lives, the messages that say it’s wrong to be outspoken, aggressive, more powerful than men. We lower our own expectations of what we can achieve. We continue to do the majority of the housework and child care. We compromise our career goals to make room for partners and children who may not even exist yet.”

*

Sandberg and I discussed the issue on a panel here in Davos, and I think that there is something real and important in what she says. When I lecture at universities, the first questions are invariably asked by a man — even at a women’s college. When I point at someone in a crowd to ask a question, the women in the area almost always look at each other hesitantly — and any man in the vicinity jumps up and asks his question.

*

So, yes, let’s encourage young women to “lean in,” but let’s also change the workplace so that when they do lean in and assert themselves, we’re directly behind them shouting: “Right!”

http://www.nytimes.com/2013/01/27/opinion/sunday/kristof-shes-rarely-the-boss.html?_r=2&

[In_The_Wind]

1. I agree, seabeyond.

[left coaster]

2. We're a long way from getting everyone behind us, sadly..

If the lack of widespread interest in threads like this here on DU is any indication..

..doesn't mean we should stop talking though, seabeyond, and I support/appreciate your efforts!

[redqueen]

3. I definitely agree that we should stop socializing women to be less outspoken.

And that women should strive to be more assertive in the workplace.

On the other hand, I question the value of this competitive model in which aggressiveness is considered a virtue and merit matters less than powers of persuasion. Capitalism is dying and the idea that we are all in a race with lots of $$$$$$ at the finish line has shown to be a destructive, unsustainable one. It is time to start moving past it, not, IMO, learning to exploit it for our own gains.

Articles like these leave so many women out. The audience for this kind of 'how to win at corporate ladder climbing' is a very small percentage of women.

[seabeyond]

4. not really. this will include all promotions, be it middle management all the way up the ladder,

or not.

it also will effect sales positions and dealing with customers. it also will migrate into personal life and be an advantage in many ways. we train girls to not speak. we can allow them to speak.

[redqueen]

5. Not everyone can rise into management positions,

and sales are just one type of job. There are many jobs, but not enough to go around. This isn't related to feminism but economics... the idea that making lots of money = success is killing us.

[seabeyond]

6. ok. nt

[redqueen]

7. I definitely agree that women should be encouraged to lean in, and speak out...

in all aspects of life, in addition to the workplace, though it will financially benefit many women in that context.

That should have been my first response.

[ismnotwasm]

8. And this

“I am hoping that each woman will set her own goals and reach for them with gusto,” Sandberg writes. “And I am hoping that each man will do his part to support women in the workplace and in the home, also with gusto.”

Yet I wish that there could be two versions of Sandberg’s book. One marketed to young women would encourage them to be more assertive. One marketed to men (and women already in leadership) would emphasize the need for structural changes to accommodate women and families.

[seabeyond]

9. ya. that is an important part of it all. unfortunately, we are

only allowed FOUR paragraphs, regardless if one sentence makes a paragraph.



thanks.

[DURHAM D]

10. The author of Lean In was on Katie yesterday.

In fact, the whole program was about women and work.

Senator Gillibrand was on. It was an excellent show and you can watch part of the show here.

http://www.katiecouric.com/

I read somewhere that back in February Katie's producers booked an interview with a psychic. That was the final straw for her as regards the silly stuff they were making her do so she got a new team and sort of started over with her show.

Her inner feminist is now on full display and she has had great guests lately and is definitely doing her bit to raise awareness on women's issues. I am sure that from time to time she will still be required to do some fluff stuff that most of us are not interested in so I would suggest recording it and screening out the silly. In my area each show is shown at least 3 times so check the local listings.

Ok... I sound like a fan. Actually, I am. She is perky alright but that does not take away from her abilities. Watch the clips from the show where they talk about the fact that the more successful a woman is the less she is "liked" while the reverse is true for men.

[seabeyond]

11. thanks. i will listen to it later today. i watch NO tv, lol. so i really do not know what is on.

when doing work where i cannot read though, i need to have video on. to listen to. generally do maddow. but will put katies show on today.

[MadrasT]

12. I was reprimanded today at an executive meeting for (get this)...

calmly making an emotionless statement of fact.

What was that met with? Hostility and derision.

"You have all these.... opinions!!!"

Like it was a bad thing and I should just stay quiet.

Dude has... issues.

[seabeyond]

13. wow. quit thinking and expressing. lol.

[MadrasT]

14. I was relaying what another person told me.

And was yelled at for "HAVING OPINIONS!!!1!1!!".

I said, "WTF, that is what she SAID TO ME, it wasn't an OPINION".

And then I was thinking, "Wait wut? So what if it was an opinion? I am not supposed to have those... at all???"

Asshat.