Ralph McDaniel Refused To Help Me Get My R&B B*ches (Hilarious text message exchange)

[ismnotwasm]

Hey you guys! I'm sure you were as delighted by this guy as all the rest of humanity. In case you forgot, here's his awesome bullshit, as transcribed by the lovely ParanoidShiksaFeminist, who actually found this masterpiece along her way somewhere in the outside world where we never go because INTERNET.

"Whether you're hoping to bag a has-been (word I can't read) like T.I.'s "Tiny", some young trim jailbait (???) like Rihanna, or perhaps the daughter of some old skool ho, like say Adina Howard. Uncle Ralph teaches you the ins and outs of hitting that bitch's Video Music Box just right. Call 212.555.6900 and talk to Ralph about scheduling your first (???). Offer is not valid for the Queen Mrs. Mary J. Blige."


Well, I thought I would reach out to him, because just as luck may have it, I am in dire need of some R&B bitches! Sadly, I don't think the conversation went my way:

More:

http://groupthink.jezebel.com/ralph-mcdaniel-refused-to-help-me-get-my-r-b-bitches-1073092284

[Arcanetrance]

1. I love it added bonus one of my favorite bands is called Belphegor

[ismnotwasm]

2. Huh, I hadn't heard of them

I'll give them a listen. I don't think I'll every grow too old for good metal. I still love OTEP.

[Arcanetrance]

3. Never to old for good music period. The day a person stops enjoying music is the day they die

even if still physically alive. I reccomed the song hells ambassador

[BainsBane]

4. That text exchange that follows is pretty funny.

[MadrasT]

5. Heh.