tx gal said it. "And people wonder why Women in general are pissed off. "

[seabeyond]

read the mens forum, thread after thread talking about us women having perpetual outrage. as if we do not have a reason to be. they actually have the audacity to sit in that group and go on and on and on about the women at du being fuckin pissed. well you know. i am fuckin pissed.

how many can we count.

today, cop in tx rapes a 19 yr old girl on the hwy, behind his car
uk judge lets go a 41 yr old rapist and child pornographer because his 13 yr old victim was predator, per male prosecutor
florida a girl raped by football player and cop tells her why bother, she will be harassed, football you know
montana, calif, alabama light or no sentence for RAPE of a CHILD
stuebenville, kansas, runs the victim out of town as they circle around their football player
canada, girl kills self rape on net and cops say, ... meh
listening to men, thread after thread throwing fits at the thought of loss of watching rape porn
a teacher raped by a 14 yr old student, tortured and murdered.

what else in JUST the last fuckin week

why women? why would we be so pissed off. or as a couple of the men say, pertpetual outrage. what in the world do we have to be mad about. silly me. must be all that emotional hysteria we are so well known for.

how much did i miss.




men... why the hell are YOU not perpetually outraged.

[seabeyond]

1. one rape of a child where the 41 yr old man was let go... too many. nt

[liberalmuse]

2. Only a woman would understand.

I know guys get assaulted, and that is unacceptable, but if you are a female, the odds are astronomical that you will have been sexually assaulted before you've even reached puberty. I should take a survey:

1. How many times have you been wolf whistled at, ogled or experienced strangers making lewd, sexual comments simply because you are walking down the street? Do you dread walking by groups of guys or past a guy in a car? If you answered "too many to count", you are likely female.
2. How many times has a guy you didn't even know grabbed your crotch or boobs for no discernable reason? I've had this happen numerous times - the first time was when I was 8.
3. How many times has a grown male exposed himself to you? If you answered more than 3x before you've reached puberty, you are female.

So I guess if you are a male, you have the luxury of not understanding what it is like being born female, and therefore some feel they can judge. Lucky you. I get a bit tired and angry about the entitlement some men seem to feel, thinking they can just help themselves. I mean, the odds are, you'll get away with it and your victim will be made to feel like she is to blame.

[LittleGirl]

6. that post should be a thread starter

Brilliant. Spoken like someone who knows. Me too. Every. damn. word.

[seabeyond]

7. 12 yrs old in the lunch cafteria line. some boy, matt, decided what the hell, and sticks his fingers

up my vagina from behind. pants, underwear and all. i mean, standing there doing nothing and decides, hey, this is a good idea.

ya

how many girls have to walk past the asshole men. and take shit. literally, take shit.

why.... would women be angry.

[zentrum]

37. Yup. Been

...through it.

Including the ride on the subway back and forth to high school, which was a nightmare for all the reasons you describe. Almost daily.

[seabeyond]

44. just ... so wrong. and so wrong, after all this progress and knowledge our girls are still

going thru it and it is still acceptable or ignored by too many.

i will give you a favorite video of mine, men addressing this.

[zentrum]

105. LOVE this video. Very cool.

Will pass it along. Thanks.

Here's one for you.
It's about the 10X10 GirlRising campaign aimed at educating girls (so empowering them) and shows the trailer for their movie.

[seabeyond]

119. zentrum, i am sorry i missed this post earlier. thank you so much for bringing it into this thread,

into this forum. totally awesome and powerful. it deserved its own Op

thank you

[zentrum]

127. Thanks for viewing it and

......letting me know!

[hollysmom]

3. One guy at work once told me he had a right to rape me

because I wasn't wearing a wedding ring and was obviously "wild". I am the meekest most mild mannered quiet person. And he wondered why I told someone he was a pervert. But then that office was full of perverts, with really weird perversions and I was the only woman who was constantly being told I had to loosen up and go with the flo.

[seabeyond]

8. and the women that go along and support this garbage. what? is it that they have been abused and

Last edited Sun Nov 24, 2013, 11:02 PM - Edit history (2)

throw sisters under the bus cause they feel safer (maybe protected from abuse) if they hang with the men abusing?

[hollysmom]

18. I needed that job, like many people do,

I complained to my boss, he just told me to lighten up. I just would not talk to that guy anymore. I had also to deal with the guy leaving pornographic material in my desk, but he was so bad, he did get fired, I thought they should send him for help before he killed someone. No one ever touched me while I worked there except the sympathetic black man who caught me when I fainted and then stood over me, until I was conscious so I would not be hassled. That place was a hell whole where I was sitting at my desk one day when the ATF burst in, guns drawn,

I don't throw women under the bus, When I was a manager, both men and women like working for me and produced and were quite loyal, there was no cursing in my office because I don't curse, There was no intimidation of woman because these were not dumb guys and knew they were working for a woman. I only had one idiot male working for me (as opposed to non-productive workers which I had to deal with) and that guy was out as soon as we could get it done. I told my staff there is no punishment for mistakes if the admit it right away and come up with a solution of how to fix the problem quickly and efficiently.

[seabeyond]

22. that is something i have forgotten in all the porn threads. how often men use porn to intimidate or

humiliate a woman. and we are not talking about what they do in the actual porn. but, the many ways men use porn to hurt other women.

good for you woman. that is the way it should be in the work place. i was always lucky in that regard/ i always had men bosses and they always made sure it was hostile free, 100%

[BainsBane]

4. Sea, those rapes can't compare to the oppression of a rape prevention PSA

that mentions the word "men" and dares to target rapists rather than placing the responsibility on victims where it belongs. Get with the program. Violence against us is nothing in comparison to the constant "haranguing" men face by having to hear women talk about rape and domestic violence. We should know the only appropriate discussion regarding violence against women is to support men's rights to be aroused by it.

For those with broken irony meters:

[seabeyond]

9. boggles the mind. truly. nt

[BainsBane]

43. The hidden post below

Last edited Mon Nov 25, 2013, 01:19 AM - Edit history (1)

Is the second like it I've seen like it tonight. The level of inhumanity is truly astounding.

[seabeyond]

49. talking about me obsessing about rape? that post below? i had another man accuse me last night, or

two, that i am the problem obsessing about rape. i think it was two. the guys must have gotten together and decided that was a good defense about women pissed about all the article of women and girls being raped.

i mean

fuckin

brilliant.

[BainsBane]

55. Sea, you're not supposed to talk about rape

We are supposed to keep our mouths shut. Rape is a perfectly acceptable topic for porn, but not for women to talk about in public unless they 1) submit to rape porn for male arousal, or 2) insist that a man's "right" to get off watching women be raped and mutilated trumps any rights other women might think they have. If you talk about unfair sentencing, the prevalence or rape, or rape prevention campaigns, that's "misandrist." The most important thing is that men never be allowed to feel uncomfortable. Anything about us--our rights, our safety, our lives--is meaningless compared to men's feelings.

[seabeyond]

56. Rape is a perfectly acceptable topic for porn, but not for women to talk about...

see baines. i fuckin forgot it again.... the topsy turvey world of here on du we CHEER the degradation of women, we stand up for the right for man to demean woman, we embrace the humiliation of women for entertainment. that makes us .... fuckin.... way cool. look at europe. lol. call it out.... and bad bad bad shit happens to us, lol.

[smirkymonkey]

100. Yeah - this kind of bullshit makes me want to puke.

[smirkymonkey]

107. Right on.

This is getting so tiresome. I just can't understand why they can't get it through their fat heads. I suppose it's because their whack off material is of supreme importance. More so than the health and safety of women' s lives and safety. It really disgusts me that they care so little for our lives.

[seabeyond]

120. yes. nt

[smirkymonkey]

116. This just outrages me.

The idea that issues that so affect our lives pale in comprison to their fragilie little egos. It is just so offensive.

[smirkymonkey]

117. Ugh! I am SO tired of the lack of empathy of so-called liberal men.

It has really made me view men in a whole new light.

[seabeyond]

118. yes. i view men differently, after listening to so many men, that declare themselves progressives.

i will honestly, openly, loudly state all the repug men in my life are a zillion times more respectful. and though they are not socially conservative, they can both respect womens rights and choices and treat me as a human being. amazing that.

[xulamaude]

122. Even though this is what they are most afraid of

(having women see through the 'liberal guy' lie) they still can not help themselves.

It's the one issue on which most men ultimately have common ground.

[seabeyond]

125. years ago i started clearly stating, this was not a repug issue but a man issue. i single voice in

a stream of preogressive demanding it is only the rw men. wrong. until we can admit that it is a man issue, and not simply rw, we accomplish nothing.

yes. they have the common ground on this.

[Texasgal]

5. It;s weird to me that

there are Men on DU that argue about this issue.

It makes me sad.

[seabeyond]

10. it does. then again.... it is the net. who knows what their life really is.

in RL, it just is not my world. but, the net is what we are living. and it is becoming such the norm.

[Tumbulu]

26. Me too, and angry

I have not renewed my star status over it, as a matter of fact.

[seabeyond]

121. and who knows how i kept mine. lol.

i didnt pay.

[seabeyond]

124. wavin... just cause i think you are a totally awesome woman.

happy holidays.

[Tumbulu]

126. Thank you!

I think you are awesome as well!

[seabeyond]

13. of course you meant to offend. so, because i hear about woman after girl after woman after girl

being raped, .... i am the problem?

[Scootaloo]

36. Wow. That was a good hide

I'm surprised at the 6-0 verdict, though.

[seabeyond]

50. i was too. i would like to hear jury. i didnt alert. nt

[BainsBane]

63. The peanut gallery and the hidden post

We don't need a post in a SAFE HAVEN group to remind us about rape. 20-25% of women in this country have been raped. One in three women have been physically assaulted by their partners. We're told we're supposed to accept rape porn and even violence in our actual lives because we supposedly "like it." They show it in the pornos. It must be true.

What pisses is off are rapists and those who defile our discussions about violence against women in an effort to silence us. Rape culture hinges on keeping victims and survivors quiet and shamed about sexual assault. The determination of some to propagate that culture truly is astounding.

[seabeyond]

65. and now... when we speak up, we are "obsessed". kinda like repugs putting out talking points. nt

[BainsBane]

70. "Why are you inventing a war on women," random GOPer

This is the EXACT same thing. Who subsidizes a multi-billion dollar campaign in rape porn? Not us. Who commits rape? Women commit 1% of them, yet make up 90% of victims in civil society. It's really easy to get women to stop "being obsessed with rape." Do away with rape. Don't rape. don't justify it; don't excuse it; don't get off watching porn about it. When rape goes away, we'll quit talking about it.

A low estimate for rape is 1 in 5 women in this country. If DUers collectively have 5000 daughters, that means 1000 will be raped in their lifetimes. Closing one's ears to discussions about rape won't change that fact. The only thing that might is working to dismantle rape culture rather than propping it up.

[seabeyond]

72. ya. those rape porn threads are sticking with you too, huh. lol. me, too. nt

[xulamaude]

90. It's such a rude awakening

to the undeniable fact that so many girls and women are raped every day/week/month/year after year - at least as long as I've been around anyway - and that so many simply don't care enough (or at all, really)

Sad.

[seabeyond]

91. i had three women standing on the porch. i asked, who was raped. of the three, there were three

rapes. one woman hadnt experienced rape.

[seabeyond]

14. are you in steubenville? did you support the footie footie football players, not being obsessed

about a girl being raped, unconscious, and lift on the lawn, in freezer weather to ....

[BlancheSplanchnik]

15. if you didn't mean to offend, then what DID you mean?

Also, what are you doing on a democratic/liberal/progressive board where we value having empathy for others unlike ourselves.

[seabeyond]

16. dusting off hands, ....

high five. you go woman.

[BlancheSplanchnik]

17. you too, sea. you too!

[seabeyond]

12. we are just looking at the sexual predators. it is thru out our life. how many times

have you had a man ignore you to address another man, been dismissed because you are a woman, had a sexist joke told to you with the purpose of putting you in your place only told to lighten up. you addressed when it comes to the decoration of the house, but husband called when talking money. so many things in our life tell us, that we are observed as less.

congressman talking on the floor about putting aspirin between your knees, legitimate rape and then talk show hosts calling us sluts and whores.

it is in ALL things.

universal.

what group of people would be expected to take it quietly. all of them. except as baines says, the white male.

[Tumbulu]

28. Oh goodness, just trying being an unmarried woman farmer

oh my......

[seabeyond]

31. goodness is right. lol. i betcha. you dared to step into the mans world. hey....

i do not know if it was facebook or her, but it was the changing farmer. it was.....

women.

i will see if i can find it. so very fuckin cool. i should have brought it here, remembering you

[Tumbulu]

32. I've seen it, beautiful pictures

thanks for starting so many wonderful threads and thanks for all that you write. The time I have to spend here is intermittent and so I never seem to do any of the heavy lifting, as all of you do.

[seabeyond]

34. yea. i am glad you have seen it cause i am hopeless in searching.

and thank you tumbulu. every unique voice is part of the whole collective wonderful voice....

[MarianJack]

19. This 58 year old man believes that...

Last edited Mon Nov 25, 2013, 07:14 AM - Edit history (1)

...there should be a special corner of Hell for any man who rapes, sexually assaults or physically/mentally abuses a woman, child or animal.

PEACE!

[seabeyond]

23. right on... brother. lol

i got a little fed up for a moment.

the uk one was the final straw. a 41 yr old man couldnt help himself cause the 13 girl was the sexual predator. wtf...

thank you

[Mnemosyne]

73. And that crap has been going on forever. In the mid-80's there was a judge in WI, if iirc, that gave

a light sentence to the pedophile rapist of a five yo girl, because he felt that the girl had acted promiscuously. One of Phyllis Schaffley's buddies, once again, iirc. We have had to be enraged for far too long.

[seabeyond]

75. but that was so long ago, we should have clearly progressed beyond that stupid. you are right,

for far too long

and it is so good to see you

[Mnemosyne]

106. Pitiful that we haven't progressed much at all in all this time.

Always good to see you here with your wisdom, sea! You help me have faith that there are still smart, caring people out there!

[MarianJack]

94. I am VERY fed up with...

...the "blame the victim" mentality, especially when the victim is a CHILD!

PEACE!

[smirkymonkey]

108. Thank you!

Nice to know there are some humanist men amongst us.

[nahant]

20. Rape & Pillage

of our women & girls is unconscionable// I have three grown girls with girls of their own and in no uncertain terms is rape ever acceptable & minor punishment will do nothing but further the rape culture.. Men come to the defense of our Moms sisters and daughters and speak out these outrages..

[seabeyond]

24. minor punishment will do nothing but further the rape culture..

that is the worst of it. there has been such a shift it seems in how police and courts are handling these. it seems to be growing and i am really concerned. but more. too many women and girls do not go to the police. these actions will only encourage our girls and women to stay quiet.

right on.

[lexington filly]

21. Too many men cannot recognize assertiveness

in women and mislabel it "anger." When a rapist gets a wrist slap, we females are standing up and speaking out and setting a boundary. When a victim is blamed or publicly diminished and vilified, we're standing up and calling it what it is--- immoral and further victimization and we're saying, "Stop it!"
Lastly, the men who think we're always outraged just don't "get us" and are remarkably insensitive and ignorant about our struggles as females and THAT's on them.

[seabeyond]

25. excellent post. and maybe that is a lot of what it is.

so many women, and with the net, just are not backing down, being good and quiet women.

good point.

i think a part of the "perpetual outrage" is to minimize the issue and dismiss it though. hence me being .... pissed. no one gets to minimize the rape of our girls and letting the rapist go. of course we are pissed. as we should be. as they should be and shame on the man that is not.

thank you

[sheshe2]

27. Yes, women are pissed off and have every right to be.

My heart breaks every time I read about the violence that is perpetrated against a woman or child.

The blindness and discriminatory actions and reactions of those that judge us are unreasonable and full of hate. Not surprising when the Republicans have declared a war on Women. It's a fight that they believe they can win. Well guess what, the dinosaurs don't understand that they are a dying breed once again. They are in there death throes.

Every time I posted about VAWA, I always said that it was not just a woman's issue. I said that everyone here had a least one woman in their lives, a mother, wife, daughter, sister or friend. There was someone that they loved and wanted to protect. I did that every time yet most of the posts went no where.

Thanks seabeyond, heartfelt thread.

[Tumbulu]

29. mine too

and the men who get caught get these nothing sentences and the women who try to defend themselves get 20 yrs minimum....

[seabeyond]

33. you, the gentlest of all... use the p word. that is pissed.

yes. you put out the most upliftingly important threads. and niyads are so informative. and they sit there.

things have changed in the last decade or so. it would not have been so hard for a man to understand that this is about their wives, mothers, daughters, sisters and friends.

[sheshe2]

62. seabeyond, you must have me confused with someone else.

I am not exactly gentle, I have been know to use 4 letter words.

If I may, my experience here as a relative newbie, well... I had posted a lot about violence against women as many had. The posts would make it to GD yet never really got the attention they deserved. They just sort of hung there. While the negative PBO posts soared!

One day I was getting ready for work. There was a post again about VAWA from someone that I respected. It was a petition for congress to pass The Violence Against Women Act. I had recently been sent to the naughty mat by the jury, lol. I sat and watched the thread for an hour and I could not post on it. Yup, it pissed me off, because no one was responding.

That night when I got home I posted something about my personal experiences about violence against women. Did I want to no, not really. Yet it hit a nerve and yes it went somewhere.

Women Rising~

[seabeyond]

67. lol. you seem to have such patience, and you are always so so so nice to me. lol.

you feel gentle. but, in the biggest voice taking on the BIGGEST subjects. that Op on ruby stays with me. grace.

anyway. you got a hide. lol lol

you are bad.

hey

it is like this, which i think is the cutest. " sent to the naughty mat by the jury". see. now i would say, i got a fuckin hide. lol

oh oh and. "I have been know to use 4 letter words." i would say. i fuckin cuss all the fuckin time

i am teasing you

i really appreciate and am enjoying your voice.

[sheshe2]

88. seabeyond, they can not take from us.

They can not take away our dignity. Not from a child not from a woman.

We are our future~

see

http://www.democraticunderground.com/110212121

[seabeyond]

89. wow. perfect. i needed to hear this song. perfect.

let it in.... fill and release.

another of your OP that is powerful. that picture of what i assume is mom and daughter. so heartwrenching.

thank you

so much work to do.

[In_The_Wind]

95. Sorry I missed this video the first time you posted it.

[sheshe2]

96. Good morning In_The_Wind.

It is a beautiful and uplifting song.

[In_The_Wind]

97. It's a very cold morning sheshe2.

Good morning [img][/img]

You have a talent for finding awesome things to share with DU.

[sheshe2]

98. Thank you, In_The_Wind~

You're right, it is brutal outside. I had to rush out after I spoke with you. I had a tons of errands to do. I am home now, Brrrrrr....I am not going again til spring.

Thanks for the coffee.

[demigoddess]

30. Almost every single woman I have known

really well, told me of being molested as a child by a family member. Sometimes fathers, grandfathers, etc. How low must a man be to molest a child in his own family. I was molested/raped (whatever) at age 3. I remembered it all along. I was not destroyed by it but I can image what women feel if it were a family member. With me it was teenage boys and I came to think they didn't know what they were doing or why.

[seabeyond]

38. i can remember at three and just vaguely. mom and i went to a neighbor womans house. somehow i got

into a cardboard box with a much bigger boy/teenager? and it was a i will show you mine if you show me yours.... kinda thing. i remember my mom crawling into the box, getting my hand and walking really fast to the house. getting me up on a chair watching my hands. all the while she was so so so angry, and it was not at me. that i knew.

but as an adult, looking back, could you imagine the fear and then the anger.

me.... i barely remember. just the pieces. and i felt protected and loved.

now though, i wonder. i am sure mom told dad. and i am sure dad did not sit quietly.

why havent i ever thought that one thru and i just accepted it. interesting.

i will have to ask my father what happened when he came home from work.

[iandhr]

35. You can say some men don't get it.

Don't say all men don't get it. Any time I see stories like that is angers me to no end.

[seabeyond]

39. went back and checked. nope. didnt say all. we have great men on du that are very loud voices

for women. very loud.

i would never say that. could not ever say that. no ALL in that post.

and good. i am glad to hear that you get PISSED, too, right along side us women.

[BainsBane]

47. That group is far from representative

of the men on this site, though they do have a collection of vocal allies.

[seabeyond]

52. true that. nt

[Texasgal]

40. I donlt think anyone has said

that ALL men don't get it.

I know I haven't.

[iandhr]

42. "men... why the hell are YOU not perpetually outraged."

On the OP.

[seabeyond]

54. men does not mean all men. and really, since i was talking about the mens forum, that is on our ass

for being perpetually angry, i would think that you would assume that is the men i am talking to.

that being said, what i have done is stop putting qualifiers. i am tired of it. some men, a few men, a handful of men, most men, the vast majority of men, half of the men a third of men, 75% of men. always having to weigh out the amount of men i was addressing. then one day, with another huge ass stink, i said fuck it. men. cause men does not mean all men. and i am not gonna play that fuckin game of always qualifying what i am saying.

if i have to put a qualifier of the portion, then when talking about ALL men, surely i have to put the qualifier of ALL in front of men to mean ALL men.

[iandhr]

77. understood.

[seabeyond]

80. thank you. do know, we all love our men. we appreciate each and every one that add their voice to

ours. for real. we would not cut off our nose to spite our face, dismissing their voice. we need their sound along with our... to have harmony.

[ismnotwasm]

45. We know

I'm married to an awesome man. He gets it. He despises dismissive behavior of women's issues, 'outrage' or what ever they want to call it. He likes (or dislikes)and respects women as human beings before gender.

The interesting thing about him, is his first wife was horrible, (due to mental illness, but he didn't realize that at first) long story, but She left him with a baby and a toddler to raise. There were messy court cases. He stepped up to the plate and did it-- I came along about 4 years later.

He was working three jobs to support them, had a diagnosis of multiple sclerosis and just kept going --he adored his little girls.

He's my standard I hold everyone against, even myself. Deep down decency and genuine caring.

[seabeyond]

57. give your hubby a hug for me tonight and tell him it is from sea in amarillo. and thanks for doing

his job with his girls. we all value that.

[ismnotwasm]

60. I will

[seabeyond]

68. and then tell me if he says... sea in amarillo? isnt that texas? there is no sea in amarillo.

woman, what have you been smoking, .... lmfao

[niyad]

41. as the saying goes, "if you are not outraged, you are not paying attention". I am paying attention

sister militant feminist
AiC, PHD, remdi95
Blessed order of the Sisters of Perpetual Outrage.

[seabeyond]

58. yes yes yes, i remember you all coming up with your outrage names. me, i wasnt creative enough. lol

i love my new picture.

[defacto7]

46. I regret not keeping up with this group...

I've been reading through some of the threads since yesterday and I really am appalled at the attitudes of men's comments about women's issues, struggles and anger. I dislike the word appalled, it's too clean.. more like disgusted. There are other groups on the site that also get their fill of irrational, disruptive and rude comments but when it comes to the massive human responsibility and the respect necessary, I repeat necessary to have any human rights at all, the equal respect between women and men trump them all.

What is it that's changed in the last 10, 20, 30 some years that has made much of the male population geared to belittle, joke, cajole, make fun of the painful fight of women? Yes, there has always been a lean toward men in societies all over the world for centuries but there is a magnification of rhetoric (and action) now, and mostly it comes from men without respect for even the simplest of women's issues let alone the invasion of women's privacy and sexuality.

My memory of the last 50 years and my connection to generations dating back to people from the 1890's is pretty good. My conclusion is that things have changed drastically. Problems existed, different issues of inequality but the misogyny has expanded in recent times and it makes me deeply saddened and sick. There is no excuse. There is NO excuse in a civilized world... question is, do we even have a civilized society at all? I think at one time I would say we were heading at least in a positive direction, I am not so sure now.

There are too many factions fighting not to loose control of their pet social ideologies, too many in politics and business that are fighting for wealth and power and will use any and all sources of control they can conjure even if they have to backtrack to old and ugly prejudice and even escalate those prejudices sacrificing reality and progress in the name of keeping control. There is too much corruption and ideology in judicial positions to allow reasonable justice of women and minorities.

I think the men who can't help but lack respect for women are fighting their loss of power. It's a strange kind of camaraderie/cowardice/social ignorance.... and the days get darker. Personally, I don't give a flying damn what arrogant men who joke at women's issues think about me for saying it either. I can proudly say this man is not a man who is among them.

I wish all women fighting for peace, freedom and respect my best in your fight.

[seabeyond]

64. frame it. another brother. do you remember a time when we were sisters and brothers? i do.

perfectly spot on with your post. in the 80's and early 90's we were making so much progress and our peer groups were right beside us. we truly saw ourselves much more of equals than what i see today. men talk about and to women in a manner that would never have been acceptable a couple decades ago. if men called a woman a slut... all the peer group i was with would shame the guy.

mid 90's it started shifting. early 2000's we started walking backwards.

good post defacto. thank you

[seabeyond]

71. you know what the worst about thsoe rape porn threads were? imagine all the women on du that have

been raped. reading men defend rape porn with all they have, obviously big users of their rape porn, getting off watching the humiliation of rape. imagine women on du that have been raped, hearing all these men brag about watching rape, insisting women have rape fantasies, that cannot be. a fantasy cannot be anything like a rape with fear and control. these men lecturing us how rape porn is good stuff.

and all the while the women on du that have been raped are thinking.... man, i was really telling myself men are just as horrified by rape. they are just as disgusted. it does not turn them on. the fear. the ugly. the pain. the humiliation and degradation of rape.

and we saw... we all watched, and listened and saw, all these men we interact with confirm. they like their rape.

sure. simulated. but you know. who really knows if it is real rape or acted rape. it all is made to look real. and that is what is important. that it looks like real rape. so my thought was....

the experience that i had, that other women had, would be our experience for these men to get off on.

now.... why wouldnt women be bothered.'

and the thing.

they could not get that.

it isnt that hard to get.

[smirkymonkey]

103. That is what I find so disgusting. They can't seem to get it through their dense skulls why we

would be outraged by the fact that they actually ENJOY seeing women being raped, brutalized, tortured and even murdered, even when it is "fiction". What kind of sick ass human being actually gets off on watching another human being being viciously harmed and violated. It just doesn't click for them why we find that mentality so disgusting and so disrespectful toward women.

[CrispyQ]

109. If I discovered any man in my life watched that shit I would have nothing to do with them,

ever again. If this is the kind of shit that gets a guy off, he's got serious issues & no place in my life. Personally, I think anyone who justifies that shit probably wants to rape. I stayed away from that thread, because decent human beings do not justify rape porn. I am curious which DUers would do so, but not enough to wade into the sewer.

And this is a liberal board?

[PassingFair]

112. +1 nt

[smirkymonkey]

101. Great post! I have become so disheartened within the last few years.

I go on a number of message boards and I have become truly astounded by the hatred and vitriol directed toward women by men. It is overwhelming. We are called out for being "misandrist" when we complain about very real acts of sexism and violence toward women and get pounded by hateful messages that are so disproportionate in response that it is almost unbelievable.

I really have become quite disgusted. For the record, most of these sites I go on are Liberal/Progressive websites. It's sickening.

[Rozlee]

48. Oh, but didn't Republican Todd Akin say "rape is a blessing?"

And Republican Richard Mourdock say it was a "gift from God?" But, let's not confuse it with "legitimate rape." And Sharron Angle said it was just making lemonade from lemons. And Republican Rep. Roger Rivard says some girls are just "so easy to rape."
www.addictinginfo.org/2013/07/16/the-party-of-rape-culture-40-republican-rape-quotes-everyone-should-remember/.

[seabeyond]

74. yes yes yes yes yes yes yes. you know? and they say it right out loud. for every person that has

been raped to hear the dismissal. i forgot some of those.

put aspirin between the knees.

[Mira]

51. Heartfelt. Real. Makes me tear up. Makes me ball up my fists.

This is so honest, and how do I count the ways in which I agree?
We deserve apologies, and we deserve understanding for requesting them.
We are owed.
Mostly a true equality, and the right to decisions about our reproductive bodies and therefore our futures.

[seabeyond]

76. oh mira... what a wonderfully perfect post. tahnk you so much for putting it exactly as you did

We deserve apologies, and we deserve understanding for requesting them.
We are owed.

repeat repeat repeat. so right on. thank you.

[Triana]

53. When men rape women then blame women when women report it....including law enforcement

....why WOULDN'T WOMEN be pissed?

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10024082855

Discounted
Minimized
Disrespected
Distrusted
Told they're "Crazy" and "over-sensitive"...

Lemme tell ya what ladies, you are NOT "crazy" and you have EVERY. RIGHT. to be pissed about this shit.

[seabeyond]

79. i didnt SEE that thread. didnt see didnt see. fuck. mra puts out 45-75% rape claims false

so when men want to validate their position all they have to do is google and some mans org will be telling them 45-75% rape claims false. do you know i was googlin something about women and rape and all i got were, false claims, women false claims. it was the oddest fuckin thing.

....why WOULDN'T WOMEN be pissed?

then i hit your second link. so fuckin powerful, the intro. i will absolutely check that out

valuable post triana. thank you

and now i saw the third link. lordy. thank you

[Triana]

86. My brother is an mra.

I'm familiar with that BS. He spouts it while taking offense that women are angry about being dehumanized and abused in epidemic proportions all over the world - then blamed for it by men when men do it to them.

[seabeyond]

87. ya. i got a knuckle dragger too. love him to pieces. as soon as he starts i tell him to

shut the fuck up. lol

[ismnotwasm]

59. I don't look at the men's forum

If it including support for groups like these I might

http://www.mencanstoprape.org

http://padvatlanta.wordpress.com/2012/08/10/support-the-healthy-masculinity-project/

(Part of men can stop rape)

http://whatmakesaman2013.com/tag/healthy-masculinities/

http://www.menstoppingviolence.org/programs/because-we-have-daughters

Etc.

The rejection of women's complaints is at it's root an issue of privilege.

[seabeyond]

81. i am going to have to check out your links. triana had some interesting ones also. one very

powerful. i probably wont get to them until tomorrow. check out i think the third one of trianas, and read the intro.

thanks for the links

[Mira]

61. A personal message to seabeyond

It is rare that I read every bit of a long thread, but I did this one.
I thank you for staying with your thread and being so reliably responsive.

As I read through it I realized you are a marvelous and special poet in how you express yourself.
You remind me of Maya Angelou.
She is powerful and poetic in a similar way.

[ismnotwasm]

66. +1000

[seabeyond]

82. my son told me the other day... the best compliment ever,

such a superb writer himself, he wants to be an author, reading my email to him he told me, you should be a poet. i write in song. thank you mira. i recognize it in your writing, only much clearer than mine.

actually, it is speaking from the heart. that takes it to song. some hear it. others dont. the ones that dont were not meant to so i dont really worry about them.

thank you.

[BlueJazz]

69. Most of us are doing everything we have time to do. I KNOW it's not enough....

...and most of us are pissed to live in a world that (sometimes) is so shitty.

[seabeyond]

83. thank you blue.... nt

[Tuesday Afternoon]

78. FUCKING HELL YEAH.

[seabeyond]

84. right on sister... RISE....

[Tuesday Afternoon]

85. UP !!!!

and over and beyond. FORWARD, ONWARD AND UPWARD. that thread. Did not realize DU had so many damaged people.

How do you feel sorry for pigs that are happy in their own shit?

Just leave them in their shit and WALK ON.

Ignore and Hide Thread are my friends and I will be using them LIBERALLY and PROGRESSIVELY.

[ismnotwasm]

92. Me too

I don't use ignore-- I just do it-- but I love the hide thread feature.

[Tuesday Afternoon]

93. well, I don't have anyone on Ignore but, It is there if I need it and I WILL use it if I see a need.

FUCK THE DUMB !!!!

I have more thoughts about all that happened in GD but, I am not ready to vocalize publicly.

Still ruminating how it all works and why.

And I don't feel educated enough to speak out much about the more esoteric feminist ideologies.

[Chalco]

99. And there's more...

How about the sexualization of women in movies
How about the lack of women, period, in movies
How about the fact that most paid artists are men when most art students are women
How about the lack of female directors of movies
How about the lack of female representation in local, state and national legislatures
How about the lack of female CEOs
How about income disparity
How about the inequity in the book publishing business
How about the ....it just goes on and on.

A documentary I saw recently about the funding of movies, all men...which I commented upon, of course, and my husband's response, "Here we go again" to which I said "I am a woman, we have a daughter who is a woman...I will never shut up."

I WILL NEVER SHUT UP

[CrispyQ]

110. I WILL NEVER SHUT UP

I love that.

Did you see Miss Representation? There was a segment where a woman in the TV business told the story of suggesting another TV channel for women, similar to the Lifetime channel, & the men in the industry were like, "What the fuck do you need another channel for?" Then Miss Rep scrolled the names of all the men's channels, including the sports channels & it was amazing! But they don't even see it. That's what galls me the most - the total blindness to their incredible privilege.

[redqueen]

111. Your post reminded me of the amazingly excellent Urban Dictionary entry for "misandry"

The MRA's anti-feminist horde of keyboard warriors are fighting back, it used to dominate the first page entirely

Generally, "misandry" refers to the hatred and oppression of men on a genotypic basis.

As sociologist Allan Johnson notes, "misandry" has no place in a male-identified, male-centered world. Moreover, Johnson states: “And it takes almost no criticism at all in order for men to feel "bashed," like it's "open season on men." In fact, just saying "male privilege" or "patriarchy" can start eyes rolling and evoke that exasperated sense of "Here we go again.” (Allan Johnson, “Privilege, power and difference,” p. 197) "Accusations of male bashing and man hating work to discredit feminism because people often confuse men as individuals with men as a dominant and privileged category of people. Given the reality of women's oppression, male privilege, and some men's enforcement of both, it's hardly surprising that EVERY woman should have moments when she resents or even "hates" men.” (Allan Johnson, "The gender knot," p. 107

Yes, GODDESS FORBID that we discuss current issues which negatively impact women's lives. The nerve of us!

[unblock]

102. checking in, male and perpetually outraged.

[seabeyond]

104. oh, you gave me a much need giggle... thank you, perpetual. appreciate it. nt

[mercuryblues]

113. why I am pissed

Last edited Sat Dec 7, 2013, 03:16 PM - Edit history (1)

My daughter has a higher rate of being raped, because of her profession. As with any women, her actions will be considered as contributing to the rape, not the rapists.

I am pissed because about 70% of men who rape admit to drinking/drugs before they rape. Whereas, less than 50% of woman who are raped admit to drinking/drugs. but it is always the woman's consumption of alcohol that is questioned, not the rapists. In fact the rapist will say, "I was drunk and can not be held responsible" The woman is held responsible for her drinking as a contributing factor and the man uses it as an excuse to get away with it.

I am pissed that outlawing rape porn is considered a violation of free speech. Sexualizing rape. You can not have it both ways. You can not be against rape and for sexualizing rape at the same time. When I googled rape porn, one of my first hits was "babysitter rapes 2 year old" Complete with a picture of a naked 2 year old, with blood spattered over her private area.

I am pissed because rapists are now telling their victims, if they report the rape, they will post pictures of it on the internet.

I am pissed that SOME men are offended by women talking about rape and will do or say anything to silence it.

I am pissed that some newscasters think it is a shame that convicted rapists careers are ruined.

I am pissed that whenever a discussion of rape comes up, if a woman doesn't talk about men being raped, they are called man haters.

I am pissed that SOMEpeople in power believe that unless a woman was beaten, the rape is not considered violent, hell sometimes it isn't even considered rape.

[seabeyond]

114. i am off du. but, had to post to say, thank you.... i hear ya. nt

[xulamaude]

115. +1000 nt

[smirkymonkey]

123. All of this just outrages me beyond belief.