On the one hand, I generally agree that a civil, "reasonable" approach is probably best...

[nomorenomore08]

On the other hand, I don't think anyone has a right to demand civility from a person who may have a good reason for being upset. Less so if the person doing the demanding has no direct experience with the injustice(s) alluded to.

And I guess this is as close to a "New Year's message" as you're gonna get from me...

[BainsBane]

1. May I ask what prompted this?

[nomorenomore08]

2. Nothing in particular. Just general thoughts that have been floating around my head lately.

I know it's sort of "DUH!" for you guys, but the "tone argument" seems to keep popping up in one form or another, and it does bother me a little, if only as a distraction from more important issues.

[BainsBane]

3. I used it myself today

Against someone calling people who always believe rape victims "idiots." I enjoy turning their arguments against them.

[nomorenomore08]

4. Well if, by all indications, 95% or more of accusers are telling the truth, I don't find that

"idiotic" at all. Besides, believing the victim's story is usually the default for other crimes...

[cinnabonbon]

5. I agree.

Using the tone argument after stepping on someone's personal trauma is adding insult to injury.

[ismnotwasm]

6. I'm usually civil

If I feel like a snark exchange-- very rare-- I can do that too. Letting people set the tone of the discussion or argument lets me know if it's worth discussing with a particular person. You'll notice I get into very few exchanges.

The "tone"argument/complaint is used by people who have misunderstood intent, don't understand the argument, or possibly have run into vehement disagreement over a topic OR had their ass handed to them at some point.

That being said, I see more often a tendency towards using sarcasm and baiting depending on topics instead of argument or discussion when it comes to discussing topics with feminists. Kind of a knee jerk defensive reaction. I no longer worry to much about it here at DU, there are exciting things happening in the world for women despite setbacks and atrocities. Feminism had, and has a huge part in paying it forward. DU is kinda falling behind in certain areas regarding genders, probably because of the MRA infestation.

[redqueen]

7. [phone]

[nomorenomore08]

8. Yeah, I've never thought of DU as being on the cutting edge of anything, particularly.

Generally left-leaning, yes, but only "radical" in comparison to how knee-jerk right-wing so much of this country has become.