Man Uses Spreadsheet to List All the Times Wife Turned Down Sex; Wife Posts It on Reddit

[freshwest]

Image via Shutterstock

by Tina Nguyen - July 19th, 2014

Yesterday, Reddit user throwwwwaway29 went to the popular web site for advice: right before she left for a 10-day business trip, her husband sent her a spreadsheet. Column A listed all the dates from the beginning of June, column B listed whether they had sex that day, and column C noted the excuse given, using “verbatim quotes.”

“I open it up, and it’s a sarcastic diatribe basically saying he won’t miss me for the 10 days I’m gone,” she wrote. “According to his ‘document’, we’ve only had sex 3 times in the last 7 weeks, out of 27 “attempts” on his part.”

For all the data hounds out there, here’s the chart:



According to our expert Nate Silveresque analysis of this Sexcel Spreadsheet, the husband has a 11% success rate at getting laid, a 22% chance of being turned down after his wife goes to the gym, and a 100% chance of both parties looking like total jackasses on the internet.

http://www.mediaite.com/online/man-uses-excel-spreadsheet-to-list-all-the-times-his-wife-turned-down-sex/

Note that on the 'Yes' days, he doesn't pen anything good about her. Maybe she didn't think he was all that fun, busily adding up his score.

I'd be sorely tempted to tell the man who created the List All the Times Wife Turned Down Sex that I hadn't *really* Turned Down Sex on those days.

I never played when I was married, but lord, I'd like to fling it at the scorekeeping spouse. I predict it won't be long before he'll be singing the D.I.V.O.R.C.E. song

What do you guys think of that - Is she wrong - Is he wrong - Or are both wrong?

The spreadsheet is a lot like men's locker room talk, IMO.

[Tetris_Iguana]

1. He had sex three times in a month and a half timespan?

That lucky dog!

[BlueJazz]

2. This sounds so unlike I would want a marriage to be like that I just..

...feel sorry for them.
Yuck! Where's the Love ??

[knitter4democracy]

3. Looking at the data, there are trends.

She's often tired or not feeling good about herself. She often gives a nonverbal answer that he takes as a no--is she asleep when he asks?

So, here's the real question: for her husband, is sex about him or them both? His wife has body image issues (feels gross, etc.), so it doesn't sound like he is doing anything to help her feel better about herself, instead just focusing on himself. Methinks she'd say yes more if he worked on making her feel like the most sexy, beautiful woman in the world and didn't wait until she was half-asleep to ask.

[1monster]

4. This! ^

[redqueen]

5. Assuming it's not a joke, he's a fucking idiot in addition to a being a *horrible*, selfish lover.

They're 20 minutes early, and that's enough time to both get theirs, *and* get ready again?

[ismnotwasm]

6. I trashed that thread in GD

Last edited Mon Jul 21, 2014, 12:46 PM - Edit history (1)

What I think is this, both parties are behaving like assholes. He apparently believes he's entitled to on-demand sex-- apparently by virtue of marriage--she makes public his ridiculous and pathetic attempt to demonstrate it.

We know nothing else about these people.

On the topic of sexual entitlement itself, even marriage doesn't guarantee anyone sex, nobody is entitled to 'getting it' and the couple obviously needs a little help in their marriage, one way or the other.

As far as locker room talk-- Ick. The idea of Discussing how often you're getting laid, with who, and what particular acts to reinforce manliness by disrespecting the acts and the women (in hetero arrangements) or something---grosses me the fuck out.

[freshwest]

9. IDK about that thread, finally found it. I thought this was a new story. It got crazy in GD.

I loved the Louis CK skit and the boxes idea posted by two women, for different reasons.

I've heard the locker room kind of talk and tore into guys and embarrassed them, but I know the genre. It's been in the back of my mind forever, expecting it to be what men think, all those stupid things.

Many men were not brought up that way but to get along in groups they went with it to escape being labeled gay. By the time a couple has paired off, they see the other as real humans, individuals, and value the gift.

[redqueen]

10. Patriarchy is so fucked up

to get along in groups they went with it to escape being labeled gay

[MadrasT]

7. Gee I can't imagine why he isn't hearing "yes" more often.

[geek tragedy]

8. Microsoft Excel--with new "human dysfunction" metrics tool nt