Watched the movie "The Wife", a movie that led us to discuss it

[question everything]

later during the day.

It has some twists and turns and the final denouement which I am not going to spoil here.

It covers the life of a professor who just won the Nobel price for literature and his wife.

They met in 1958, in Smith College. So, yes, women were not expected to be writers, to publish, to be admired and respected.

This was the time of Mad Men when women were supposed to be happy supporting their husbands, taking care of the home and of the kids.

But then, argued my spouse, things have changed why didn't they? Because, I replied, it was too late. And, I suppose she was convinced that this was her lot, that she should have been happy as her husband's "muse" as he grateful described her.

The final was a bit of a cop-out but otherwise, Glenn Close deserves an Oscar.

[BigmanPigman]

1. I always was and am bothered by that term.

People on DU even use it sometimes. It makes women into objects..."the wife" but never "the husband". The table, the spoon, the wife, the car, etc.

[Kali]

2. I do that. the husband.

half don't like "my" for exactly the same reason - a possession/object LOL

[BigmanPigman]

3. Do you also say "the friend" instead of "my friend"

and "the neighbor", "the teacher", "the sister" etc.? When do you use "the" vs "my"? Just curious and am trying to understand.

[Kali]

4. hmm, no not really now that you mention it

and it is only on line (and that almost entirely here on DU) and only for ... the husband. I write my sister or my friend. trying to think of how I do it for the kids. the oldest kid or the niece? maybe I have done that...or was it my oldest? can't recall. it is interesting I seem to only do it for him. who knows?

[BigmanPigman]

5. What is his opinion regarding this?

[Kali]

6. LOL doubt if he gives a shit

in my mind it was sort of an elevating way of phrasing. "my" being possesive, "the" being singular or like "the only one"

I don't remember when I started doing it, but I used to try to remain more anonymous and didn't talk about my family much so at some point I consciously decided on that rather than other ways I have seen like dear hubby or DH, or better half...

[BigmanPigman]

7. Interesting. Thanks...food for thought.

[question everything]

8. And this was the point of the movie

That her, and many of that generation, many today, sole existence was/is "the wife."

[Bluepinky]

9. The husband and I saw this movie, and we both liked it very much.

Yes, Glenn Close gave us an Oscar-worthy performance. The movie was titled The Wife to diminish her, to show her as less than the male character; over the course of the movie, it’s demonstrated that this is an erroneous assumption, as she is clearly more capable than her husband.