The thing is, those differences mean, and have always meant, equality versus inequality. Freedom for

some but not for others. Constitutional rights for some but not for others. Privilege for some and restrictions for others. Advantages for some and disadvantages for others. Opportunities for some and roadblocks for others.

Those differences have meant the difference between life and death for the entirety of America's history.

Those differences matter.

Those differences spark conflict because they should spark conflict. Because no nation that prides itself on the slogan "beacon of light" unto the world should ever tolerate inequality or discrimination on any level. You don't get to claim with your mouth what your laws and practices don't reflect without sparking conflict.

You don't get to claim the aspiration while working to undermine it all at the same time.

Changes to the power dynamics, to the social paradigm, bring hope to those who have been denied the experience of full citizenship - and full citizenship includes feeling safe in your rights - merely pointed to a law on the books doesn't mean a person gets to experience the full meaning of the rights on those books. (You can vote - but pass this test first - or you have to travel 25 miles to the nearest poll, or you must jump through this hoop or that hoop. You can marry - but you can't marry here, or plan your wedding here, or buy your cake here. You can buy a house, but you can't live in this neighborhood. You can work, but you can't get a living wage, or a safe work environment. You can have life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness - but only if you look like us and think like us.)

Change also means the dominant cultural must stop manufacturing reasons for why they should be dominant to others. They must stop trying to oppress others in order to remain the dominant power. You're not losing any rights or being penalized. You're just no longer allowed to penalize others for not being you. No longer allowed to discriminate. You must accept that all Americans have the right and privileges of full citizenship - instead of chipping away at those rights.

We can't set aside a difference that means someone else will lose out on their rights. We have no right to bargain away the rights of others - and that's exactly what the Conservatives want. They don't want compromise - they want capitulation. They will only accept change that looks like change but still gives them the advantage - no real change at all. They see a gain by those not them as a loss to them - when it isn't.

That's a mighty significant difference.

You can't come to the table with those who only seek an advantage and expect to find common ground.

Someone intent on denying you your humanity will never agree that we share a common humanity.

We will never be treated as Americans by those who see us everything but American.