Some of you may recall that on July 8, 1947, numerous witnesses claim that an Unidentified Flying Object with five aliens aboard crashed into a sheep and mule ranch just outside Roswell, New Mexico. This a well-known incident that many say has long been covered up by the U.S. Air Force as well as other Federal Agencies.

However, what you may NOT know is that during the month of April in the year 1948, nine months after that historic event, the following people were born:
Mike Pence
Donald Trump
Paul Manafort
Mitch McConnell
This is the obvious consequence of aliens breeding with sheep and jackasses.

I truly hope this bit of information clears up a lot of things for you. It certainly did for me.

A car full of Irish nuns is sitting at a traffic light in downtown Dublin, when a bunch of rowdy drunks pull up alongside of them.
"Hey, show us yer breasts, ya bloody penguins!" shouts one of the drunks.
Quite shocked, Mother Superior turns to Sister Mary Immaculata and says, "I don't think they know who we are; show them your cross."
Sister Mary Immaculata rolls down her window and shouts, "Piss off, ya fookin' little wankers, before I come over there and rip yer balls off!"
Sister Mary Immaculata then rolls up her window, looks back at Mother Superior, quite innocently, and asks, "Did that sound cross enough?


An oldie but a goodie.