Initech

Initech's Journal

December 2, 2015

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #1: GOP WTF Edition

Ed note: It's been two years since one of these appeared and I figured I would take a stab at it, however I lack most of the formatting tools that the TTCI usually has. However I tried to keep it as close to the real thing as possible.

GOP WTF Edition

It's been exactly two weeks since the horrific attacks at the Eagles of Death Metal concert at the Bataclan in Paris that have had the world searching for answers. As if that weren't bad enough, a man by the name of Robert Lewis Dear went and shot up a Planned Parenthood clinic in Colorado Springs, CO, and, *LAST MINUTE BREAKING NEWS*, another mass shooting happened in San Bernardino, CA. And if you're looking for answers, don't look to the GOP. It's widely believed that Carly Fiorina (1) instigated the whole thing while Ted Cruz (2) sympathizes with radical right wing, violence advocating abortion nuts, and Donald Trump (3) goes full Nazi. And what does republican front runner Ben Carson (4) offer to help the situation? He is saying "both sides are guilty" of hateful rhetoric, but let's play a game here and see just who is. And then we have a newcomer to the TTCI - Youtube star among the evangelical community Joshua Feuerstein (5) who not only has been instigating violence on his Youtube Channel, doubled down on the hate and attacks against Planned Parenthood. He also covered his ass on these hateful comments. Mississippi Governor Phil Bryant (7) thinks that Obama letting Syrian refugees into the US has an anti-religious message (it doesn't). . If you need a break from the madness and need a laugh, the republicans are getting into some sexy time with Ted Cruz (6) spilling way too much information about his "wild" college years. And from the crazy preacher corner Kevin Swanson (8) offers his "condolences" to the victims of the terror attacks in Paris and specifically the horror that went down at the Bataclan. Jim Bob Duggar (9), yes, of that Duggar family, is back with some sound parenting advice. To round off this edition, Televangelist and disgraced crook Jim Bakker (10) is back and blaming his victims. Enjoy! And as always don't forget the key!

[font size="12"]Carly Fiorina[/font]

If you're puzzled by the attacks at the Planned Parenthood facility in Colorado as much as we are, Carly Fiorina definitely isn't the one to look to for answers or sympathy. My definition of today's modern GOP is that they have a glorious lack of empathy. And while evil, their intentions are not the best and clearly misguided. Enter Carly Fiornia, disgraced HP CEO and current disgraced GOP candidate. This is Carly before the shooting:

"“Whether you’re pro-choice or pro-life, the majority of Americans are horrified by the reality that we’re harvesting baby parts through late-term abortions,” Fiorina said.

http://www.nationalreview.com/article/426725/carly-fiorina-the-view-planned-parenthood"

After the shooting:

"“Secondly, this is so typical of the left to immediately begin demonizing the messenger, because they don’t agree with the message. The vast majority of Americans agree, what Planned Parenthood is doing is wrong. That’s why the vast majority of Americans are prepared not only to defund Planned Parenthood, but also to stop abortion for any reason at all after five months.”
http://reverbpress.com/politics/carly-fiorina-planned-parenthood-lies/

Shoot the messenger? Extremely poor choice of words there, Carly.

[font size="12"]Ted Cruz and Troy Newman[/font]

But the insanity didn't stop there. Not even 8 days before the terror attacks happened, Ted Cruz gratefully accepted an endorsement from extreme far right author and anti-abortion activist Troy Newman. Who is Troy Newman? Why he's the author of a book calling for execution of Planned Parenthood personnel. Newman has since denounced the terror attacks in Colorado, but the damage has been done. Right Wing Watch says:

"Newman has not only opined on the governments duty of “executing convicted murderers, including abortionists, for their crimes in order to expunge bloodguilt from the land and people,” but once even claimed that the murderer of an abortion doctor and his bodyguard was a “political prisoner” and victim of “judicial tyranny,” since he was deprived of his “right to present a defense that claimed that the killing of the abortionist was necessary to save the lives of the pre-born babies that were scheduled to be killed by abortion that day.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/content/ted-cruz-hailed-activist-who-wants-abortion-providers-executed-eight-days-planned-parenthood#sthash.3AMjLqJQ.dpuf"

Yikes. And what was Ted Cruz's response in his receiving of the endorsement?

"But Ted Cruz apparently saw his extremism as a boon, releasing a statement on November 19th touting Newman’s endorsement of his presidential campaign and declaring that America needs more “leaders like Troy Newman.” "

NEXT!!!!!!!!!!

[font size="12"]Donald Trump[/font]

Too bad there's no "Nazi sympathizer" icon because that's exactly what this needs. In the wake of the terror attacks in Colorado Springs and the Bataclan, Donald Trump not only doubled down on his comments to build a giant border fence along the US - Mexico border, he also doubled down on this threat to go full Nazi if he's elected to the highest office in the land:

(CNN)Donald Trump on Monday suggested he would "strongly consider" shutting down mosques in the U.S. as part of the response to the terror attacks in Paris.
"Well, I would hate to do it but it's something you're going to have to strongly consider," Trump said during an interview on MSNBC. "Some of the absolute hatred is coming from these areas...The hatred is incredible. It's embedded. The hatred is beyond belief. The hatred is greater than anybody understands."
http://www.cnn.com/2015/11/16/politics/donald-trump-paris-attacks-close-mosques/"

Why yes! Donald Trump would actually consider overriding the first amendment's guarantee of freedom of religion. But oh no, the Trumpster didn't stop there:

On Thursday, presidential candidate Donald Trump provided the clearest evidence yet of his disregard for religious liberty, telling Yahoo News that if elected he would target Muslims with a previously unthinkable degree of intrusion. “We’re going to have to do things that we never did before. And some people are going to be upset about it, but I think that now everybody is feeling that security is going to rule,” he said. “Certain things will be done that we never thought would happen in this country in terms of information and learning about the enemy. And so we’re going to have to do certain things that were frankly unthinkable a year ago.”
http://www.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2015/11/donald-trump-muslims-religious-liberty/416889/

Yup he's gone full Hitler there. And you never, ever go full Hitler. In fact Trump, these are the words I would like to tell right to your face:

[font size="12"]Ben Carson[/font]

Fans of the comedy "30 Rock" are well familiar with Tracy Jordan's "Governor Dunston" character. If only the creators of that amazing TV comedy had access to the bumbling, stumbling completely clueless brain surgeon that is Dr. Ben Carson, they would have had a field day coming up with new material. If you've seen that episode, life is scarily imitating art these days. In fact, most would say that he is Governor Dunston in a way. Right now in the wake of what happened in Colorado Springs, he first announced that "both sides" are guilty of offensive rhetoric. But who is really? Let's take a closer look:

http://www.rightwingwatch.org/content/ben-carson-both-sides-blame-abortion-rhetoric
http://www.democraticunderground.com/1017311784

[font size="12"]Joshua Feurstein[/font]

Who is Joshua Feurstein? He's an evangelist and Youtube star among the hate-mongering evangelical crowd. Why is he in the news? Well after last week's terror attack at the Colorado Springs Planned Parenthood, his videos became viral for his unbelievably extremist points of view on the PP attack and those that provide abortions. But now he's accused of covering his ass in order to get away with posting those videos on Youtube. He's since taken down the videos but he is unaware that on the internet, there are no such things as take backs.

"Here, Joshua Feuerstein is practicing stochastic terrorism. He is literally calling for violence against Planned Parenthood and its staffers. Classy, no?

I tried to link directly to Feuerstein’s own video, but the chickenshit took it down. The clip is in this Cult of Dusty rant about Feuerstein, so despite Josh’s efforts, his words will live forever...

To quote from the video:
Planned Parenthood has hunted down millions and millions of little innocent babies, stuck a knife into the uterus, cut them, pulled them out, crushed their skull with forceps, ripped their body apart, sold their tissue, and threw them bleeding into a trash bin."

http://www.dailykos.com/stories/2015/11/30/1455382/-Joshua-Feuerstein-is-another-stochastic-terrorist-inciting-violence-against-Planned-Parenthood

Yes he's openly advocating assassination of PP doctors, nurses, and personnel. After last week this guy needs a wakeup call from the FBI. That makes two known terrorist advocates. Shut 'em down.

[font size="12"]Ted Cruz[/font]

Warning: If you're doing anything that involves eating at the time you are reading this list, look away. Hit the scroll button or you might lose your lunch / breakfast / dinner.
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Well there you have it, in the era of "too much information", Ted Cruz revealed some details about his personal life, that most likely should have not been revealed. Those three words can stop anyone from saying something they'll later regret, but it certainly didn't stop Ted Cruz:

“Jiminy Cricket!” began Ted Cruz, preparing to give a diatribe on his nostalgia for the easygoing availability of contraceptives at his alma mater, Princeton.

During a speech at a town hall in Iowa during which he meant, ostensibly, to debunk the “war on women,” the Texas senator and Republican presidential candidate took some time instead to connect the issue to the availability of condoms.

“When the war on women came up, Republicans would curl up in a ball, they’d say ‘don’t hurt me!’ Jiminy Cricket! This is a made up, nonsense example. Last I checked, we don’t have a rubber shortage in America. When I was in college we had a machine in the bathroom, you put 50 cents in— and voilà!”
http://gawker.com/ted-cruz-yearns-for-his-glory-days-in-college-when-con-1745368723?utm_campaign=socialflow_gawker_facebook&utm_source=gawker_facebook&utm_medium=socialflow

Wow, no words except this:

[font size="12"]Phil Bryant[/font]

So apparently the Syrian refugee crisis is a religious issue, at least according to the governor of Mississippi. Once again appearing on lunatic fringe right wing program "Today's Issues", hosted by the American Family Association, Bryant apparently told the host that the Syrian refugee crisis is a religious issue (hint: it's not).

…Bryant was among the governors who demanded an end to the resettlement of Syrian refugees in the U.S., calling the plans to take in at least 10,000 refugees “extremely dangerous” and pledging to “do everything humanly possible to stop any plans from the Obama administration to put Syrian refugees in Mississippi.”
He appeared today on the American Family Radio show “Today’s Issues” to highlight his opposition to refugees, citing a group of Syrians who turned themselves into U.S. authorities on the Mexican border as further proof that America is facing a serious threat from the refugees.
http://www.alan.com/2015/11/30/mississippi-governor-obama-attacked-our-faith-by-welcoming-refugees/#

[font size="12"]Kevin Swanson[/font]

Notorious hate church pastor Kevin Swanson recently hosted an event at his church where three GOP candidates including Mike Huckabee and Ted Cruz attended. But that's not why he made the list this week. Kevin Swanson is not the source you should be turning to if you're seeking answers about what went down at the Bataclan during the Eagles Of Death Metal concert. If you're a music fan like I am and know the Eagles of Death Metal, you know that the band has nothing to do with the Eagles, or Death Metal. But these hate-filled pastors didn't seem to get the message.

So Kevin Swanson had this hate-filled diatribe at his church:

This is a message from God. God is shooting a shot across the bow and we better be paying attention to this. Music matters, culture matters. Culture ultimately is a reflection of world view, and so if you want to know world view just take a look at the culture and say 'oh that's what the world view is all about.'"

Oh really? So do you enjoy any music that's not religious? Any sort of rock or pop music has the same world views whether you like or not. He continues:

"You were dancing to this worship service to the devil, the devil came in, the devil did what the devil does best: he killed, he massacred, he destroyed. As the devil did his works," again, the microphone is in the face of those who were attending the conference right now, I'm asking the question of those attending that concert "did you appreciate the works of the devil as your friends where being shot up in that concert?""

http://mediamatters.org/blog/2015/11/20/right-wing-radio-host-victims-of-bataclan-terro/207012

So... rock concerts are worship services? And the devil is the one killing people you say? My question for you - and this is someone who has attended hundreds of concerts for all kinds of different genres of music - do you even know what you're angry about, Mr. Swanson? And you are aware that "This Is Spinal Tap" is a comedy movie, right?

[font size="12"]Jim Bob Duggar[/font]

Just when you thought it was safe to turn on your television again or go to any media outlet that doesn't mention the Gazillion Kids and Counting family, Jim Bob Duggar resurfaces and offers some very sound parenting advice and how people can learn from his mistakes. After the scandal that broke the family with Josh Duggar being outed as one of the biggest sex perverts in the modern era, Jim Bob is back with a Christian approach as to how to avoid raising a kid to be a sex addict:

Jim Bob Duggar began his [very long] post with a basic advisory for parents. He stated that fathers could remove all media [books, magazines, television shows, and the Internet] that have sensual content from the home as a way to protect the family unit.
That’s right, he thinks you should BAN all media sources from the home in an effort to protect your children from learning about sex. Jim Bob noted, “Replace them with good things like wholesome music, biographies of great Christians, and play decent old-fashioned family games together.”"
http://www.celebdirtylaundry.com/2015/jim-bob-duggar-open-letter-explains-how-not-to-produce-a-josh-duggar/

How about this for some sound parenting advice - don't raise so many children that you can't keep track of what they're all doing!!!!

[font size="12"]Jim Bakker[/font]

"Last Week Tonight With John Oliver" recently wrapped its second season. While we won't see anything until next February, this season had one of its' best episodes yet where John eviscerated the televangelist grifter community and skirted around IRS rules to establish his own church (if that's not Emmy material, what is?

). These people make money hand over fist by selling what's essentially an invisible product. Frank Zappa called them out back in the 80's on his awesome album "Broadway The Hard Way". Jim Bakker, one of the men frequently mentioned on that album, is back in the news.

"This week on “The Jim Bakker Show,” Jim Bakker recounted a story that “a very well-known man of God” told him after he was released from prison about the threats facing televangelists. According to Bakker, this man sat next to a self-proclaimed witch on an airplane who told him that her coven was going to “take down” Jim Bakker. “She said, ‘Right now, all the witches ... They’re all agreeing they’re going to destroy the television ministries and we’re starting with Jim Bakker. And we are all praying, praying to destroy him,’” Bakker said. Bakker’s guest, End Times radio host Rick Wiles, chimed in to mention a former Satanist named John Ramirez, who he says “targeted the pastors and the ministers that were really preaching the word of God.” Bakker added that these practices are why you see pastors “going through troubles,” because “all the demons in hell brought whatever, whether it be sex, drugs, or women” with them to attack godly preachers."

http://www.rightwingwatch.org/content/jim-bakker-blames-witches-televangelists-scandals#sthash.g3ziTQbZ.dpuf

Love it when the holier-than-thou crowd plays the persecution card. Funny Jim, the only guy I've seen attack your types lately is John Oliver. And he did a damn fine job of it too. Private jets in the name of Jesus? That's not the message from the Bible. Is John Oliver a man of God? I'll just leave this here.

See you next week!

December 1, 2015

Dumb Criminals: PA Man Takes Ambulance For Joyride, Stranding EMT Personnel And Patients

The call for a breathing problem early Friday morning in York City was a pretty standard one for the EMT and paramedic who dealt with it until they brought their patient outside and realized their ambulance was gone.

Someone had stolen it when no one was looking — or, at least, no one besides the in-vehicle camera and a vehicle tracking device. The latter led to a quick recovery of the ambulance, and the former showed a cheerful young man apparently quite pleased with his exploits.

"He seemed to be having a good time," said Jim Arvin, the president and CEO of White Rose Ambulance, the York City company that owned the vehicle. "He seemed excited."

http://www.yorkdispatch.com/story/news/2015/11/28/police-york-city-man-stole-ambulance-few-minutes/76495058/

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