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In reply to the discussion: Ed Norton 🧵: I'm no political pundit but I grew up w a dad who was a federal prosecutor & he taught [View all]PatSeg
(47,284 posts)with a narcissist, such as a spouse can be a real eye-opener for many of us. I could find some redeeming qualities in my ex in spite of his narcissistic behavior. He had many clarifying moments of compassion and understanding, but would quickly revert back to cruel and often violent behavior. As he got older, he became more introspective and realized he really couldn't be with other people for long. He takes in stray dogs instead. At least he does no harm and has sporadic bursts of generosity, but from a distance.
However, I've known too many men who never were introspective. They just kept repeating the same patterns over and over again, always resulting in great pain and destruction. At least my ex knew that he could not sustain an actual relationship and pretty much withdrew from society. He was perceptive enough to know his weaknesses.
I've known so many. They were accomplished liars and convincing actors. It always blew my mind that a person could pretend so well for so long. I can't fake love or affection and can't fathom how anyone else can. Its like they are a different species.