Reply #14: they've made the decision the cats are more important than your health or your mom's phobia [View All]

[pitohui]

they love the cats more than you, the way to handle it is not to go to their place for xmas

there is nothing "welcoming" about the passive-aggressive act of having FOUR CATS in a house when you know that your mom-in-law has a severe phobia, and you know that your father in law has a severe allergy to the cats, it's a nice way of saying fuck you she doesn't like you

i have a severe allergy to cats and the way i handled it was that i simply didn't physically visit the offending relatives in question until such time as they put my health first and their fetish for cats second -- a process that meant that they missed many holidays with me and i wasn't bothered in the least

your mom, your dad, and yourself have a right to have your mental and physical health issues respected, if your sister in law doesn't respect them she doesn't love or welcome you in any genuine sense so fuck her in my opinion

admittedly i never said "fuck 'em" to MY offending relatives, i simply said that my health didn't allow for such visits and went on my merry way

life is short and being sick and miserable at xmas to please a bitchy sister in law is a waste of time and your precious holiday


send bro and sister in law a xmas card and go on your way

well you did ask how i would handle it -- and that's exactly how i DID handle it

visiting the sister in law and putting up w. her ridiculous demands that the cats only be removed for an hour (you can't even clean up the cat hair in an hour sufficient to make it safe for your dad) just guarantees misery for everyone for an indefinite period of years until such time as you wake up and realize that NO you don't reserve to made sick every xmas, your dad doesn't deserive it, and your mom doesn't deserve it