Reply #10: I remember reading awhile back how much you loved your wife & grieved over her illness. [View All]

[pacalo]

I'm really disheartened to hear that your wife has little appreciation for all you've done. I've had to care for my mother after her breast cancer surgery years ago; I know the heartache of a caretaker having to witness the suffering when nothing can be done to ease the pain, & I know how much work goes into taking care of someone so helpless.

There are some people who turn on the ones they love the most when they're hurting; they blame the caretaker because they're hurting. The person with the illness knows the loved one will excuse them for using them as a punching bag & continue loving them. Like you said, you can't fix her disease; could she be "punishing" you for being healthier?

Her turning to another man that you're both living with must be the ultimate hurt! After all the beautiful feelings that you've written about your wife through the years, I have to wonder how she could treat you so callously? You've been there for her for better or for worse, & now that you're down on your luck, she's turned to a "friend" of yours & is flaunting it.

Considering all that's happened, it sounds like you need to get out of there for your own sanity. Don't allow yourself to be treated this way. Find another job far away from where she is. If you have to, get a job in another field.

Take care, TSS, & here's a :hug: