Yes Men pull off hoax at Go Expo Energy Conference in Calgary

[Newsjock]

Source: Canadian Press

CALGARY (CP) - A pair of anti-corporate activists may have pulled off a bizarre prank at the Go Expo Energy conference. Footage was broadcast on a television station Thursday from an online site called theenergynews.com showing members of a group called the Yes Men posing as key players from the U.S. oil industry.

... At first, the speech just seemed odd.

"Without oil, at least four billion people would starve," one of the speakers earnestly told the crowd. "This spiral of trouble would make the oil infrastructure utterly useless.

"And starving would become the new black."

When the speaker started to talk about vivolium - a renewable energy source nobody in the room had ever heard of - the red flags started to go up.

But once the pair lit up two torch-like candles and urged the audience to do the same in memory of a dead Exxon oil worker, attendees and organizers realized they'd been had.

Read more: http://www.cbc.ca/cp/Oddities/070614/K061421AU.html

[Hestia]

1. OMG - How Funny! K&R n/t

[Hissyspit]

2. I got an email from them saying that it did happen. K&R

June 14, 2007
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

EXXON PROPOSES BURNING HUMANITY FOR FUEL IF CLIMATE CALAMITY HITS
Conference organizer fails to have Yes Men arrested

Text of speech, photos, video: http://www.vivoleum.com/event/
GO-EXPO statement: http://newswire.ca/en/releases/archive/June2007/14/c5086.html
Press conference before this event, Friday, Calgary: http://arusha.org/event/7214
Contact: mailto:[e-mail]
More links at end of release.

Imposters posing as ExxonMobil and National Petroleum Council (NPC)
representatives delivered an outrageous keynote speech to 300 oilmen
at GO-EXPO, Canada's largest oil conference, held at Stampede Park in
Calgary, Alberta, today.

The speech was billed beforehand by the GO-EXPO organizers as the
major highlight of this year's conference, which had 20,000
attendees. In it, the "NPC rep" was expected to deliver the long-awaited
conclusions of a study commissioned by US Energy Secretary
Samuel Bodman. The NPC is headed by former ExxonMobil CEO Lee
Raymond, who is also the chair of the study. (See link at end.)

In the actual speech, the "NPC rep" announced that current U.S. and
Canadian energy policies (notably the massive, carbon-intensive
exploitation of Alberta's oil sands, and the development of liquid
coal) are increasing the chances of huge global calamities. But he
reassured the audience that in the worst case scenario, the oil
industry could "keep fuel flowing" by transforming the billions of
people who die into oil.

"We need something like whales, but infinitely more abundant," said
"NPC rep" "Shepard Wolff" (actually Andy Bichlbaum of the Yes Men),
before describing the technology used to render human flesh into a
new Exxon oil product called Vivoleum. 3-D animations of the process
brought it to life.

"Vivoleum works in perfect synergy with the continued expansion of
fossil fuel production," noted "Exxon rep" "Florian Osenberg" (Yes
Man Mike Bonanno). "With more fossil fuels comes a greater chance of
disaster, but that means more feedstock for Vivoleum. Fuel will
continue to flow for those of us left."

The oilmen listened to the lecture with attention, and then lit
"commemorative candles" supposedly made of Vivoleum obtained from the
flesh of an "Exxon janitor" who died as a result of cleaning up a
toxic spill. The audience only reacted when the janitor, in a video
tribute, announced that he wished to be transformed into candles
after his death, and all became crystal-clear.

At that point, Simon Mellor, Commercial & Business Development
Director for the company putting on the event, strode up and
physically forced the Yes Men from the stage. As Mellor escorted
Bonanno out the door, a dozen journalists surrounded Bichlbaum, who,
still in character as "Shepard Wolff," explained to them the
rationale for Vivoleum.

"We've got to get ready. After all, fossil fuel development like that
of my company is increasing the chances of catastrophic climate
change, which could lead to massive calamities, causing migration and
conflicts that would likely disable the pipelines and oil wells.
Without oil we could no longer produce or transport food, and most of
humanity would starve. That would be a tragedy, but at least all
those bodies could be turned into fuel for the rest of us."

"We're not talking about killing anyone," added the "NPC rep." "We're
talking about using them after nature has done the hard work. After
all, 150,000 people already die from climate-change related effects
every year. That's only going to go up - maybe way, way up. Will it
all go to waste? That would be cruel."

Security guards then dragged Bichlbaum away from the reporters, and
he and Bonanno were detained until Calgary Police Service officers
could arrive. The policemen, determining that no major infractions
had been committed, permitted the Yes Men to leave.

Canada's oil sands, along with "liquid coal," are keystones of Bush's
Energy Security plan. Mining the oil sands is one of the dirtiest
forms of oil production and has turned Canada into one of the world's
worst carbon emitters. The production of "liquid coal" has twice the
carbon footprint as that of ordinary gasoline. Such technologies
increase the likelihood of massive climate catastrophes that will
condemn to death untold millions of people, mainly poor.

"If our idea of energy security is to increase the chances of climate
calamity, we have a very funny sense of what security really is,"
Bonanno said. "While ExxonMobil continues to post record profits,
they use their money to persuade governments to do nothing about
climate change. This is a crime against humanity."

"Putting the former Exxon CEO in charge of the NPC, and soliciting
his advice on our energy future, is like putting the wolf in charge
of the flock," said "Shepard Wolff" (Bichlbaum). "Exxon has done more
damage to the environment and to our chances of survival than any
other company on earth. Why should we let them determine our future?"

About the NPC and ExxonMobil: http://ga3.org/campaign/lee_raymond/explanation
About the Alberta oil sands: http://www.sierraclub.ca/prairie/tarnation.htm
About liquid coal: http://www.sierraclub.org/coal/liquidcoal/

[Shallah Kali]

7. Soylent Oil. I have seriously wondered if anyone ever looked into something like that

....

[Random_Australian]

11. You have no idea how much effort some people have gone to.

And of course, when we do go ahead and invent agrichar and stuff, nobody cares.

Green chemists rule. (Well, with the help of the other chemists, of course)

[DarkTirade]

13. Technically, it should be possible.

People make oil out of other organic materials. Can't see why people would be any different.

[Donnachaidh]

23. Hell -- think of all the golf courses that could be built

We can save LAND for the Exxon executives by outlawing cemeteries! :sarcasm:

[neuvocat]

35. Just put oil pumps on the cemetaries we have now.

They could start with the veterans cemetaries since they sort of do that anyway.

[satya]

25. Thermal depolymerization.

Anything Into Oil, Discover Magazine, 05.01.2003

Unlike other solid-to-liquid-fuel processes such as cornstarch into ethanol, this one will accept almost any carbon-based feedstock. If a 175-pound man fell into one end, he would come out the other end as 38 pounds of oil, 7 pounds of gas, and 7 pounds of minerals, as well as 123 pounds of sterilized water. While no one plans to put people into a thermal depolymerization machine, an intimate human creation could become a prime feedstock. "There is no reason why we can't turn sewage, including human excrement, into a glorious oil," says engineer Terry Adams, a project consultant. So the city of Philadelphia is in discussion with Changing World Technologies to begin doing exactly that.

[alfredo]

47. Tallow candles are still being made.

liposuction alone could keep several college towns in candles.

[PittPoliSci]

3. brilliant, absolutely brilliant!

[Bozita]

4. Thank you, CBC

[Newsjock]

5. Another story here

http://www.canada.com/calgaryherald/news/story.html?id=20ee8637-9bd1-4ed3-b0d8-4e14ea4d035b&k=41943

By the time candles supposedly made from remains of a deceased ExxonMobil janitor named Reggie Watts were handed out, an audience of oil and gas professionals attending a keynote luncheon at Calgary's Gas and Oil Exposition realized they'd been had.

A man named "S.K. Wolff," claiming to be an analyst for the Washington-based National Petroleum Council, and co-speaker "Florian Osenberg," said to represent ExxonMobil, were getting ready to show a memorial video made by Watts when security officers forcibly ushered the two men from the stage.

... In Calgary, ostensibly to promote their book and a documentary they filmed three years ago at the Plaza Theatre tonight, the activists said they couldn't resist taking a shot at the oil and gas trade show, held over three days this week at Stampede Park.

"This was a great opportunity for us, like the holy grail, really," said Bichlbaum. "We've never had an audience like this. These people are wrecking the Earth and they're quite conscious of it."

The premise of the presentation, which included a PowerPoint lecture by "S.K. Wolff," was that as humans begin to die as a result of calamities caused by climate change, their remains could be harvested for an alternative fuel source called "vivoleum" that would eventually replace oil.

[slowry]

6. Holy shit -- watch this if you haven't.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=LiWlvBro9eI">http://youtube.com/watch?v=LiWlvBro9eI

It's so wrong, but at the same time I have to admire the brilliance of it; after all, it highlights so well how inhuman corporations can be, that they'd never take responsibility for the lives they destroy, unless they are forced to do so.

[orleans]

9. this video is absolutely wonderful! oh my god!!

on the down side...i used to have faith in the bbc.

oh well.

[deutsey]

17. This stunt also forced Dow to release press releases stating

they would not compensate the victims, or clean up the site, or accept responsibility for the disaster.

It really snapped into sharp focus the inhumane nature of corporations.

[glitch]

27. Brilliant. nt

[ClintonTyree]

21. Splendid, check out the guy's name.....

"Jude Finisterra" :rofl: Literally, "earth's end" or "end of the earth" or something like that. :rofl: These guys are great. I hope they continue to be a thorn in the side of BIG BUSINESS for a long, long time. :woohoo:

[mcg]

42. Another youtube video of the one of the Yes Men posing as a Halliburton rep

http://youtube.com/watch?v=00w3nY6hkas

"The Yes Men have struck again. On Tuesday, a man claiming to be a representative of Halliburton gave a presentation at the "Catastrophic Loss" conference at the Ritz-Carlton in Amelia Island, Florida. Conference attendees include leaders from the insurance industry. We speak with the Yes Men's Andy Bichlbaum, who took part in the hoax."

[wordpix]

46. $500/yr. for medical treatment from Bhopal disaster? Nice compensation

NOT :puke:

[emlev]

8. See "The Yes Men Movie" if you haven't

They're amazing.

[orleans]

12. it's on google video

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-5119261857162106907&q=%22yes+men+documentary%22&total=3&start=0&num=10&so=0&type=search&plindex=2

(i'm watching some of it now...unbelieveable!)

[progressoid]

29. Oh man, that's great!

THanks for the link!

[underpants]

32. 20 minutes into it

BRILLIANT!!

[orleans]

14. ! ! ! "i'm pleased to introduce our next speaker,

mr. hank hardy unruh who has a master of business administration from the university of texas, austin. hank hardy unruh grew up in montopolis, texas. the son of a cattle rancher. his early experience with his father's business imparted to him a lasting interest in trade, and after obtaining his masters of business administration degree, he joined the WTO organization in 1998. since then he has spoken on trade matters before a variety of fora. he is currently living in paris. the title of mr. unruh's presentation is: the future of textiles, the future of a lifetime and the lifetime of the future."

i'm cracking up over this!

[underpants]

37. "Slavery was not allowed to continue to its natural economic conclusion"

or something to that effect. That was hilarious.

I watched the whole thing. The only people who actually listened to and understood how outrageous their speeches were were the students who clearly got insulted by it. Oh and the Aussies agreed with ending the WTO ---too funny.

[Lisa]

36. our local library was thrilled when I gave them the DVD ...

It's been very popular!

[Mojambo]

10. Those guys do terrific work.

I'd second the suggestion to see their movie. It's great!

[TheMadMonk]

15. Any idea of how the audience took it?

Amused? Outraged? No comment?

[annabanana]

16. I love subversive theater. . . n/t

[jollyreaper2112]

18. so, where is the video of this event?

All I see in the thread is a link to the Dow/BBC stunt and their full movie.

[On the Road]

19. God, I Love Those Guys!

They are absolutely great.

[conspirator]

20. Bravo! This is the kind of activism we need. nt

[GliderGuider]

22. I immediately thought of Nazi soap

Apparently "Professor Rudolf Spanner produced somewhere between 10 and 100 kg of soap from corpses from the mental hospital in Konradstein".
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Soap_made_from_human_corpses

Even Holocaust historians are saying widespread use of Jewish corpses to make soap was anti-Nazi propaganda. But, man oh man, that one sure does stick in popular memory. It could well have been the inspiration for Vivoleum.

[tanyev]

24. Lots of Vivolium here:

[guruoo]

26. yesmen are a bunch of crooks....

Still haven't received the SurvivalBall I ordered from them over six months ago!


"It's basically a giant inflatable orb," "If catastrophe threatens a large population,
the business manager simply enters the orb, puts it on, and it protects him or her in
any climate condition, whether it involved tornadoes, hurricanes, tsunamis,
ice conditions or heat conditions."





heheh!

[joefree1]

28. Link to event video, images, etc., here

http://www.vivoleum.com/event/

Video of the event "coming soon." The web page takes awhile to load. They're getting a lot of visits and press.

[underpants]

30. "the credibility and legitimacy of our speakers is always on par"

Now THAT'S funny

[Blue_Tires]

31. lol....brilliant

[Dystopian]

33. Wow! K&R

This is the greatest thing I've read in a long time...These guys are geniuses.....Too funny..just beautiful...

peace~

[Wednesdays]

34. This is terrific, but also exposes something HORRIFIC

...in that the audience didn't realize they were "had," and the yesmen confronted, until the candles were passed out and the video about to be shown. Which means the whole speech about vivoleum and how it's created was never questioned or denounced by those executive creeps...in other words, anyone with a gram of a conscience would have been mortified by such a proposal, and hauled those guys' butts off the stage before they could utter a second sentence. Or at the very least, walked out of the hall.

But no, they all sat there entertaining the notion that all this could be possible: allowing the genocide of billions of people in order to enrich themselves!

:scared:

[Shallah Kali]

38. An oil exec argued before the war on Iraq that war for oil and other resources was legit

I think it was in an irish paper. He couldn't understand why so many people consider it immoral to kill for oil or other valuable resources. I have to keep reminding myself that not all psychopaths do their deeds personally. Some go into big business and make their thrill kills in the name of profits. I have read that one expert, Robert Hare, estimates that 1 in 100 North Americans are psychopaths. There must have been many of those in that room that night.

[IndyOp]

43. That is exactly their gig Wednesdays - the more professional, corporate the

audience the more likely they will go along with OUTRAGEOUS ideas. They went to a business conference in Europe and talked about the inefficiencies of elections in democracies -- how campaign funds go to marketers who create commercials and the commercials are aired on TV to try and influence votes -- this is a terribly inefficient system. By using the basic business logic to maximize efficiency, campaign funds should be paid by candidates directly to voters. The business people at the conference were nodding and agreeing and...

:eyes:

[IndyOp]

44. Another - Acceptible Risk & Profits: The Golden Skeleton

On April 28, 2004, at a London banking conference to which they had accidentally been invited because of their satirical website, "Dow representative" "Erastus Hamm" unveiled "Acceptable Risk," a Dow industry standard for determining how many deaths are acceptable when achieving large profits. The bankers enthusiastically applauded the lecture, which described several industrial crimes, including IBM's sale of technology to the Nazis for use in identifying Jews, as "golden skeletons" - i.e. skeletons in the closet, but lucrative and therefore acceptable ones.

Several of the bankers in attendance then signed up for licenses for the "Acceptable Risk Calculator" and even posed with Acceptable Risk mascot "Gilda, the golden skeleton in the closet," for photos.

The exercise was intended to illustrate the absurdity of depending on "Corporate Social Responsibility" (CSR) to set limits to corporate behavior. If corporations were completely free to behave as the market demands - the logical extreme of CSR - then industrial catastrophes of huge magnitude, such as Bhopal, would not necessarily be disadvised.

http://theyesmen.org/hijinks/dow/acceptablerisk.shtml

[Sequoia]

39. Also over in Enviornmental forum.

Thanks for all these links everyone.

[firefox_fan]

40. SAW them in person!

At their movie preview a few years ago...

[BrklynLiberal]

41. The truth is often said in jest.... Who knows what Big Oil has up their smelly sleeves for the

decade?

[Chico Man]

45. "A Modest Proposal" Indeed

Swift would be proud.