Alan Keyes Announces For President

[Mark E. Smith]

Source: Renew America (some nutjob loon site)

Will appear in Values Voter Debate Sept. 17

On Friday, Sept 14, Alan Keyes filed a Statement of Candidacy (Form 2) with the
Federal Election Commission -- thus officially announcing as a Republican
candidate for President of the United States.

Keyes told Janel Parshall, host of a nationally syndicated radio show, that he's
"unmoved" by the lack of moral courage shown by the other candidates,
among whom he sees no standout who articulates the "key kernal of truth that
must, with courage, be presented to our people."

He added, "The one thing I've always been called to do is raise the standard ...
of our allegiance to God and His authority that has been the foundation stone
of our nations life" -- and he decried the lack of "forthright, clear and clarion
declaration" from the other candidates concerning this issue.

Read more: http://www.renewamerica.us/news/070914keyes.htm

---

Can't wait for Alan to play an important role in any upcoming Republican
debates.

I wonder if he'll have anything to say about this:

[northzax]

1. Excellent

It's just not a campaign season without krazy keyes. Wonder what state he is pretending to be from this year?

[Yupster]

18. He's in because he has experience at facing off against Obama

A return race could get him up to 30 % if everything falls into place just right.

[barb162]

20. Maybe closer to zero percent.

He is worse than whacked.

[TexasBushwhacker]

51. But that's what's so crazy, he got 27% against Obama

That's just how effed up some of the GOP are. They would vote for a nutcase like Keyes just because he's Republican.

http://www.cnn.com/ELECTION/2004/pages/results/states/IL/S/01/index.html

[0007]

49. He's back he's back ... hooray

Allen Keys couldn't even carry freerepublic.com which is about one tenth of one per cent of all the goof balls.

Now he may carry Midland Texas if Mitt fails. Did you go and watch Mitt speak the other day in Midland, Yupster? Or did you go to Bill Richardson's shin dig?

Can't wait to hear Allen Keys speak

[quiet.american]

2. I wonder why it hasn't occurred to him to start a mega-church.

He'd make out like a bandit with the Kool-Aid drinkers, instead of running these pathetic and embarrassing politial campaigns.

[AlCzervik]

3. Woohoo, ain't no crazy like Alan Keyes crazy cause Alan Keyes crazy don't stop.

[barb162]

21. And neither does his ego.

[MannyGoldstein]

4. I Loved His Scene In Borat!!!

Keyes is an unintentional comic genius!

[FVZA_Colonel]

22. You could literally see the moment he realized he was getting played by Cohen.

The entire thing was, indeed, brilliant.

[snooper2]

52. this

http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=alan+keyes+borat&search=Search

[saltpoint]

5. Saturday morning cartoons. An Alan Keyes candidacy.

It's all of a piece.

[silverweb]

6. Heehee....

This will definitely make the whole campaign scene more entertaining! :D

[Tab]

7. Just go away, Alan

He's well spoken and literate, but his positions are so far to the right...

This just in: Alan Keyes Caught in Love Triangle with Ann Coulter and Rudi Guililady

[Posteritatis]

13. I don't want my mind's eye anymore. :( (nt)

[grace0418]

31. Hell no, let Alan stay! He's such a fucking loon he'll just make the GOP look even worse.

When he was running against Obama here in Illinois, even all the other Illinois Republicans rolled their eyes at him. You could tell they knew he was a total lunatic and they couldn't believe they had to pretend to support him. It was HI-larious. LOL!

[ejbr]

8. Considering the field of candidates,

I really can't blame him for throwing his hat in the ring. However, didn't he talk shit about Dick Cheney's daughter? The hard-core kool-aid drinkers are probably not too happy about that. I'm not saying that they really care about the insults and travesties that are directed towards gays. I'm just saying that to insult any aspect of their infallible leaders is unacceptable. I look forward to him talking shit about the other candidates. Yes, Rudy's drag will definitely be used by this desperate bigot!

[Joe Bacon]

9. You really expect Keyes to say anything about Miss Rudy???????

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[Kurovski]

30. He'll say "Mama never looked better!"

Family-values demands a wider stance be held for right-wing transvestites. At least that's my guess from the evidence.

[Joe Bacon]

36. oh no, KKKeyes will forgive Rudy because he's a Republican

And you can bet that Keyes will blame Ms. Rudy's actions on what is behind Bill Clinton's zipper...

[Gravel2008]

47. KKK? You know he's black, right?

So what's with the KKK?

[0007]

53. ....guess you haven't heard

[Totally Committed]

10. Just when I thought today was gonna be ALL bad news!

:rofl:

This is awesome! The guy is pure RW Whacko-City. It should be fun to watch.

TC

[GreenTea]

11. So now the republicans can claim diversity and not just a party of.....

rich old white men....They must be paying Keyes a pretty penny and all his expenses in order to have their token....And Keyes will take all he can get from the rich old white men...They need Keyes as much as Keyes needs their money!

[msanthrope]

38. Well, if the Repubs aren't paying Keyes

to run, then we should.

You just can't put a price on that level of batshit crazy..............

[Mz Pip]

12. Happy happy, joy joy!

Nobody feigns moral outrage quite a well as batshit insane Alan Keyes. :bounce: :bounce:

Is this debate going to be televised? I'll definitely watch! :popcorn:

Mz Pip
:dem:

[silverweb]

27. You need this pic to go with that headline.

Rule #1: "HappyHappyJoyJoy" requires appropriate visual reinforcement. :D

[Mz Pip]

44. Alan bears a certain

resemblance to Stimpy. Those wild eyes, That manic smile. Yep, that's Alan!

Mz Pip
:dem:

[silverweb]

48. Now that you mention it....

Excellent observation!

:rofl:

[salin]

14. Because there is just such a lack of theocrats running...

oh wait... that captures all but two of the current candidates...

I think he is doing this to make some more money off of his foolish listeners.

[DavidDvorkin]

15. At last, a Republican candidate who speaks well

He says crazy stuff, but he says it so much more eloquently than any of the other GOPers.

Of course he has no chance at the nomination, but it's pleasant to dream about it.

[Hawaii Hiker]

16. Just another right-wing loony in the mix

Although he's real extreme, even for those loonies...

Alan Keyes for president - Excuse me for a moment while I :puke: :puke: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :yoiks:

[orleans]

17. will the "value voters" debate be held on faux or at the 700 club? n/t

[potone]

19. Oh, goody, goody, goody, goody, goody!

Just imagine if he won! Then we could spend all of our time debating who was the worst President we'd ever had--him or Bush. This is too delicious.:rofl:

[sallyseven]

23. Be still my heart. He is in the race.

Those rw repuks are such morons

[GOPNotForMe]

24. That worthless gnat? AGAIN? Ugh. nt

[hayu_lol]

25. Its about time the Repugnants had a spoiler, like Nader, of their own...

Keyes will pull much of the wacko right away from the rest of the Repugnant heathens.

[dropkickpa]

26. But it's too late to announce!!

See that, Al? C'mon October 12th!

[Evergreen Emerald]

28. unfortunately, in comparison the other wing-nut politicians will

look nearly normal.

[Ishoutandscream2]

29. Comic relief. The Texas Rangers after the All Star break

and Alan Keyes running for president. I'm splitting my sides already!

[loudsue]

32. The only way that could be better news is if

Ann Coulter announced SHE was running as the first woman president.

:rofl:

:kick:

[daninthemoon]

33. He's so weird. He seems to think he is the anti-Obama.

[opihimoimoi]

34. Alan is beyond weird....but he speaks in ways we can comprehende....but its still nuts

[davidinalameda]

35. where can I send a check?

and when should we expect Pat Buchanan to announce

[Hardrada]

37. At least, Pat Buchanan makes sense now and then.

Keyes never!

[RiverStone]

39. comment below

:boring:

On second thought...goodnight

[Jim Lane]

40. I hope his running mate will be Katherine Harris -- the dream ticket (n/t)

[Warren Stupidity]

41. Spaceshot!

He really is my absolute favorite idiot rebublican.

[scarface2004]

42. it s about time alan...now where s gary bauer!!!??

amerika turns it s lonely eyes to you!!!

[Starbucks Anarchist]

43. He will be defeated by the margin of error.

[Skittles]

45. geat comedy

has he invested in a new selection of sweaters?

[rocktivity]

46. What can he say about Rudy with HIS daughter?

:evilgrin:
rocknation

[BigDDem]

50. This is great but I wish

he was running as a 3rd Party candidate.

[Rambis]

54. And there was much yawning (nm)

x