You can't ride a scooter in the DoJ

[Demeter]

http://www.pogge.ca/

I'M SORRY, BUT THE CROSSED OUT PARTS DIDN'T COPY THAT WAY--IF YOU'RE CURIOUS, CLICK ON THE LINK!

Really, you can’t, no matter how truly madly deeply and sincerely you admire that icon of modern republican virtue Patrick Fitzgerald, no matter how much you think he deserves a chuckle after all he’s been through, not the least of which would have to be accepting ambiguous and vaguely unsettling praise from the back-stabbing flaccid criminal enabler attorney general who is his boss, Alberto Gonzales.

This is just a squib to let lovers of adorable American law-enforcement guys republican virtue know that PatFitz finally agreed to speak publicly about something more than the narrowest evidence he can put before a court at this very moment. No, he didn’t quite do what so many of us are still hoping for – ie, outline the full criminal conspiracy that Dick Cheney has been running as a fourth branch of the American government for some years now. Fitz just agreed to be a good sport and appear on a National Public Radio show called “Wait Wait ... Don’t Tell Me!” in a segment called “Not My Job,” where distinguished people subject themselves to teasing questions on subjects that are not their normal specialties. (Weblink to audio at post’s end.)

As my fellow lover of hopelessly shy smart guys who need some female advice about their ties republican virtue Godammit Kitty says, there was an upside to Fitz’s appearance on Thursday evening at Chicago’s Millennium Park. When a guy is getting repeated standing ovations from a crowd of 8,000 people, you gotta figure that the White House talking-points aren’t working on everybody. No underlying crime? Tell it to the judge (Reggie Walton, if possible). And so much for “nobody cares” and “this is just inside-the-Beltway stuff,” as Kitty says.

Unfortunately, the teasing our Patrick got seems to have centred on scooter jokes:


``We are so not going to ask you any questions about Scooter Libby,'' NPR news anchor Carl Kasell told Fitzgerald during the taping. Instead, he was peppered with questions about other scooters: the two-wheeled scooter made by Segway Inc., Scooter the stagehand from television's Muppet Show and former New York Yankee Phil Rizzuto, also nicknamed ``The Scooter.''

And then at the end, the hosts apparently insisted on giving our boy a child’s scooter as a gift:

He didn't personally say anything that could be construed as partisan or belittling. He even seemed reluctant to take the scooter.
Gosh. That was so not the way to treat our Fitz, as any addict fetishist lover of republican virtue would know. Patrick Fitzgerald does not make light of criminal convictions. They make him sad. He speaks of them with scrupulous, fastidious correctness, within very narrowly correct boundaries, and they always make him sad.

The Patrick Fitzgerald that we addicts fetishists lovers of republican virtue know would not have wanted that scooter. What were you thinking, NPR? How could you so misunderappreciate your national treasure?

TO LISTEN TO WAIT,WAIT, CLICK ON THE LINK:

http://www.npr.org/templates/rundowns/rundown.php?prgId=35

AND ON THE LISTEN TO THE WHOLE SHOW LINK ON THAT PAGE.