Bar the gays, ban the cigs?

[FlyingSquirrel]

By Dr. Wes Browning

One of the things I thought would happen, the day after Obama took office, was “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” would be rescinded and he would flat-out order the military to stop discharging homosexuals. Instead, after nearly six months of no movement on the subject, a study commissioned by the Pentagon and the Department of Veterans Affairs recommends a total ban on cigarettes in the military, including a ban on smoking in quarters and a total ban on sales of cigarettes on bases.

Before I begin exhaling the rant that is just now forming in the pit of my tar-stained lungs, I should explain my relationship to the subject at hand. No, I am not a veteran, I was an Army brat. And no, I don’t smoke. Well, not for almost 12 years now. I watched my Army dad smoke three packs a day for decades, getting incredible deals on cheap smokes even well into his retirement, first at Fort Lawton, and then when he couldn’t buy them there, down in Fort Lewis. Then, I watched him die of cancer. So I totally get that smoking is bad for you. But I bet you get that, too: You’ve seen the PSAs. So we’ll just brush that aside and get to the heart of the matter.

BEING A SOLDIER IS BAD FOR YOUR HEALTH.

Can we have warnings on military recruiters, pasted to their foreheads? “NOT IGNORING THIS MAN MAY RESULT IN SERIOUS INJURY OR DEATH.” “MILITARY SERVICE — A LEADING CAUSE OF DEATH.” “DON’T LET CHILDREN BE EXPLODED BY YOUR BOMBS.”

We can’t have gays in the military because it would be socially disruptive. Sort of like the kind of social disruption you get when you tell the one in three smokers in a room they not only can’t smoke there, they can’t smoke anywhere on the planet. The Pentagon will see Seattle’s 25-foot rule, and raise it to a 25,000-mile rule.

More at link:

http://www.realchangenews.org/index.php/site/archives/2862/

[Sal Minella]

1. Warning: Listening to this man may result in death, psychological fragmentation, or

debilitating injuries of various sorts." On every recruiter's forehead. Yes, let's do it.

[Occam Bandage]

2. A study commissioned by an agency made a nonbinding recommendation?

OMGWTF RAGE

[FlyingSquirrel]

3. I'll just put you down for one unrec.

By all means, please do your part to make sure that fewer people are exposed to any kind of irony (or humor, if you were to follow the link).

How's that negativity working out in your life? Are you happy, or do you just THINK you're happy?

[PSzymeczek]

4. I read they decided not to do this.

They determined guys in a war zone are stressed enough withouthaving to try to quit smoking.