Best Late-Night Jokes Mocking Right-Wingers

[locopolitico]

Best Late-Night Jokes Mocking Right-Wingers

"Christine O'Donnell released a commercial in which she says, 'I'm not a witch.' That's pretty good, though not as effective as her opponent's slogan, 'I'm not Christine O'Donnell.'" –Jimmy Fallon

"Somebody threw a book at President Obama. If you're trying to scare a president by throwing a book at him, you're one president too late." —David Letterman

"I do miss George Bush. Compared to these teabaggers and the people who are pandering to them, he looks like a professor." —Bill Maher

"What is it with conservatives? Seriously, I'm not trying to be partisan but it seems like if they're anti-illegal alien, they have illegal aliens working for them. If they're anti-gay, they turn out to be gay. If they're super Christian, they're a witch." —Bill Maher

"Newt Gingrich is so pro-marriage, he can't stop doing it. He is so morally upright, that he's only had sex after he was married. Just not always to the woman he was married to." —Stephen Colbert, slamming Newt Gingrich for moral hypocrisy

More here: http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/bl-republican-jokes.htm

[Ken Burch]

1. self-delete

n/t.

[Greyskye]

2. You didn't look too hard...

''It's interesting. During his speech, President Obama spoke about the difficulty of accepting a Peace Prize while we're fighting two different wars. And President Bush got really upset. He said, 'Hey, I'm the one who started both those wars, I should have won the prize.'' —Jay Leno

''Bristol Palin and Levi Johnston are getting married. There's a rumor going around that Sarah Palin may try and prevent the wedding. You think she'd stop them from taking their wedding vows? Do not underestimate this woman. She stopped John McCain from taking the oath of office.'' —Jay Leno

''Of course, a lot of right wingers are very upset about this because they believe this health care bill will cost a lot of money. You know what I think? Just pretend it's another unnecessary war. You'll feel better about it already.'' —Jay Leno

''One of John McCain's former top campaign aides says that when he talked to Sarah Palin after McCain picked her to be his running mate, she said it was 'God's plan.' So, apparently, God wanted Obama to win.'' —Jay Leno

''A family values conservative Republican from Indiana, Mark Souder, has admitted to having an affair with a woman on his staff. Apparently Souder would take this woman to remote locations inside state parks and have sex with her. See, this is what Republicans mean when they talk about opening up our public lands for drilling.'' —Jay Leno

[Ken Burch]

4. Sorry. Couldn't find them on the link

It's not an easy link to work.

[mackerel]

3. My pick

"Somebody threw a book at President Obama. If you're trying to scare a president by throwing a book at him, you're one president too late." —David Letterman

I can't stop laughing...

[Rhiannon12866]

5. That's the one that made me laugh, too...

:rofl:

[zenprole]

6. Humor Can Save Us...

because fascists implode when people laugh at them. I liked:

"North Korea is getting a new evil dictator. Kim Jong Il is appointing his dim-witted son, Kim Jong W. Il." –David Letterman

"President Obama has decided not to sign a bill that would make it difficult for homeowners to fight foreclosure. Why is Obama all of a sudden so sensitive about people being kicked out of their house? Oh yeah, right." - Jimmy Fallon

[politicalhumor]

7. Gotta love Bill Maher

‎"The Republicans released their 'Pledge to America.' It's 21 pages of phony charts and bad ideas. Sarah Palin got a copy, and she said, 'How am I supposed to fit all this crap on my hand?'" —Bill Maher