Resolutions For The Damned

[davidinalameda]

http://www.sfgate.com/columnists/morford/

I love Mark Morford!

This is the year.
No, really. This is the it. This is the year you resolve to let it all hang out and lick the fingertips of the divine and stop holding back and stop quivering with unchecked anticipation/dread as you realize that, if you care a whit for self-definition and spiritual nuance and hot wet intelligence and deep karmic color in this tsunami-hammered, Bush-ravaged world, you are desperately needed right now. It's true.

Alas, many are dejected. Many of the blue or Democratic or progressive or open-minded persuasion are understandably heading into 2005 feeling a bit out of sorts, depressed and bitter and angry and still just a little appalled at the apparent widespread fear-induced ignorance of a country that somehow re-elected the worst president in U.S. history. Yes, still.

Well, buck up, jacko. It could be worse. You could be Michael Jackson. Or Janet Jackson. Or Tito. You could be Anne Coulter or Bill O'Reilly or Trent Lott, people whose souls have become so infested with rat dung that their third eye is brown. See? Feel better already.

[arcane1]

1. Mark rules

:loveya:

I love #3:

3) More dildos fewer sitcoms. Do you know anyone who lives in Texas and I don't mean Austin because Austin isn't really a part of Texas given how it actually has some culture and music and a decent university and a pulse? You do? Good.

Hie thee to divine-interventions.com and order a Baby Jesus Butt Plug and send it to them as a gift and tell them you shall pray hard that they use it to find God. Sit back and wait for the apocalypse with a devious grin.

[villager]

2. another great Morford piece...

well worth reading for currently "blue" -- in the other sense of the word -- DUers...