An Apology to Younger Americans

[plurality]

http://prorev.com/apology.htm

BY SAM SMITH

In observance of the approaching 66th anniversary of my arrival on this planet I would like to apologize to you on behalf of my generation. Even members of Confederacy had the grace to secede from the union; my generation has remained within like a deadly virus, subverting it, shaming it, screwing it, stealing from it, and finally strangling it. It will likely be known as the worst generation - the one that brought the First American Republic down - unmatched in the damage it has done to the Constitution, the environment, and a two century struggle to create a society democratic and decent in its politics, economics, and social concourse.

To be sure, when we were young we were, as we said then, somethin' else. We launched the civil rights, women's, gay, and environmental movements, not to mention creating some memorable music before descending into disco. Soon other things started to go downhill rapidly. We became not only the generation that invented the phrase, 'never trust anyone over thirty,' we proved it.

My lawyer assures me that my personal liability in all this is limited to a few missteps including energy inefficiency, chronic ineffectiveness, owning a minivan, and occasionally listening to Don Imus. But he agrees that a public apology would be helpful in the event of a war crimes tribunal or in determining reparations owed by my heirs to future generations.

Besides, it is unlikely that any of my cohorts will apologize as it is against their principles to do so absent pending court action or especially poor media. And as my attorney notes, there are plenty of things worthy of contrition, such as the New York Times' publishing Tom Friedman, which do not actually constitute a criminal offense.

For purposes of public remorse, incidentally, I define my generation as consisting of anyone who reached 40 after Watergate and who was at least 40 on September 11, 2001. I choose these dates because the resignation of Nixon was about the last good thing to happen to America and September 11 ended most hope that anything good would happen soon again.

And so, on behalf of all my fellow members of America's crummiest generation, I make this humble confession, begging forgiveness from those who follow:

I apologize for Bhopal and Three Mile Island and, in advance, for all the biological, chemical or nuclear disasters that will occur thanks to economic rapaciousness and without the slightest help from a terrorist.

I am truly sorry for Martha Stewart, the Washington Post, Howard Stern, the Brookings Institution, and Bill O'Reilly,

much more

[Beearewhyain]

1. Apology Accepted

Just don't let it happen again. :-)

[plurality]

2. actually I'm 25 so I'm not apologizing for shit

I just thought it was worth posting.

[Beearewhyain]

4. Ok...say it with me...

It was a joke to the article.

[plurality]

5. i know it was a joke so was mine.

as we all know text doesn't exactly translate it too well.

[Beearewhyain]

8. Good Point

No worries

[Malva Zebrina]

3. Arghhhhh

what arrogance from the younger generation. !!! :-) You little snot noses!

Of course we do not know what we are talking about, or of what we speak . Ugh

I fully realize the irony and the humor behind your post. :-)

It is an age old response and will always be that way.

But not all of us are senile, babbling or out of it. Some of us, actually are of the same age as many of your representatives and some of us are, INdeed, beyond the age of a George Bush, who does not seem to understand that as you age , you become more accepting and more ammenable to diversity.

Bush just thinks as long as he says he "accepts" Jesus as his lord, that glosses over all of his egrigious sins.

LOL :-) because it strikes me funny, tonight.

[Beearewhyain]

6. Relax...it was a joke

I am not exactly a "snot nose" myself. 36 years here. But As I said above No worries.

[youngred]

7. think they're kidding too nt

[youngred]

9. wow, that's pretty impressive

Now help me clean it up before the mess gets worse :-)

[plurality]

10. i've got the mop :)

[Beearewhyain]

13. I bring the bucket

Might have to wear it on my head if I accidentally got someone mad. :dunce:

[LostInTheMaise]

11. Who is Sam Smith?

And is America the only country to blame for the madness?

Sam Stone was alone but I know not of Sam Smith.

[BeFree]

12. Yeah, me too...apologize that is

We were gonna change the world. We changed it all right-- for the worse.

Corporations were gonna be saddled and kept under control. Instead we let them run free and go wild. We were gonna end pollution in our lifetime, instead we've polluted this world for the next hundred years.

Yeah, there's a few of us still living the way of Peace, Love and Hope, but for the most part our fellows look down their car hoods at us, or down from the second floor of their McMansions.

As much as we'd like too, we can't fault the youngsters for their errant ways....we taught them everything we know.

What do we know? Money is numero uno. Status is king. If anyone gives us any shit, why, we'll just nuke 'em outta our way. Thanks for the memories, old timers, it's better than what the future holds, I'm afraid.