Use religion to make right wing liars shut up….

[Webster Green]

I’ve had just about enough of this religious crappola being shoved down our throats, but its given me an idea. Every time one of our RW acquaintances, pundits, politicians or talking heads starts quoting lies from the brownshirt handbook (ie.: "Iraqi schools are all open with a nice fresh coat of paint", "Bush is the greatest president ever", "the economy is looking quite rosy, thenk yew"), start sprinkling them with holy water, make the sign of the cross over and over, say: “Out demon, out! I command you to leave this place.” That should shut them up pretty quick, and maybe the demons would actually leave.

:evilgrin:

[emad]

1. Exorcise the fascists?

I think the holy water had better be at least 70 proof....

[Skittles]

2. I am sick of religious crap too

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.

[Az]

3. Religion is not going anywhere

It is as much a part of the world as politics is. We best figure out how to deal with it and talk about it rather than just hoping it will go away.

[Skittles]

9. how to deal with it?

there has been brainwashing going on for thousands of years. You are right, it ain't going anywhere so my way to deal with it is to say I'M SICK OF IT.

[historian]

4. let them ramble and rave...

then you have 2 choices (works wonders for me no onehas come to my door for ages)
a) use logic on them - noahs ark was very small - typical size for the times - elephants rhinocerous giraffes?????? It would take them all day to shovel the stuff, then you had to feed them. And where would you toss all the stuff - out the window? You couldnt it was raining.
or b) tell them you are a satanist and invite them in for a little pre lunch sacrifice.

[prodigal_green]

5. My brother did this once

He was working on a documentary about neo-paganism in NYC. They knocked on the door, he invited them in, offered them tea, then brought out the Crowley (he is not, by the way, a Satanist). Never heard from them again.

[calimary]

6. Send 'em this:

Recently, Dr. Laura Schlessinger said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew,
homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22, and cannot
be condoned under any circumstance. The following is an open letter to
Dr. Laura penned by a US resident which was posted on the Internet.


Dear Dr. Laura:


Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's law. I have
learned a great deal from your show and try to share that knowledge with
as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual
lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly
states it to be an abomination. End of debate. I do need some advice from
you, however, regarding some of the other specific laws and how to follow
them:


1. When I burn a bull on the altar of sacrifice, I know it creates a
pleasing odor for the Lord?Lev. 1:19. The problem is my neighbors. They
claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?


2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus
21 . In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for
her?


3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her
period of menstrual uncleanliness?Lev. 15:19-24. The problem is, how do I
tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.


4. Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and
female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of
mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you
clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?


5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2
clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill
him myself?


6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an
abomination?Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I
don't agree. Can you settle this?


7. Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a
defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my
vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?


8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair
around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev.
19:27. How should they die?


9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me
unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?


10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different
crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two
different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to
curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the
trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them?Lev. 24:10-16?
Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do
with people who sleep with their in-laws?Lev. 20:14?


I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you
can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and
unchanging.


Your devoted fan

By the way, I noticed the other night on "Larry King" with that awful, sanctimonious Marilyn Musgrave (R-CO) and the pastor, discussing the gay marriage issue with San Francisco's mayor and a gay actor, that I was just WISHING someone would have brought up the following:

Any time they throw a Bible quote at you, remind them that the Bible also admonishes "Judge not, lest ye be judged" (Matthew 7:1). And if they insist that we all take the Bible literally, point out that the Bible also said the world was created in seven days.

In addition: THIS one - for all the holier-than-thou Ashcrofts and Robertsons and Falwells who parade their "piety" around in public.

“When you pray, go to your inner room, close the door,
and pray to your Father in secret.” --Matthew 6:16.

Just modern-day Pharisees, ALL OF THEM. The kind that killed Christ, by the way.

[ArkDem]

7. You are right arguing about religion and politics

are a sure fire way to get people to shut up.

[Mari333]

8. I already do that

My mother, who is a 77 year old voracious Mel fan and a pre Vatican catholic, is who I use to "feel the pulse" of the way some people think
Yesterday she stopped short of calling me a heathen, and told me that "it would be good for you and your husband to go into a church on Ash Wednesday and ask Jesus for a miracle for your loved one in Iraq"
I told her "Mom, Jesus said the Kingdom of God is within, therefore, I can talk to him wherever I am"
She said "NO jESUS IS IN A CHURCH THE CATHOLIC CHURCH"
I said whatever makes her happy is fine with me, and I will speak to "god" wherever I am because thats what works for me
I know deep down she is terrified Im hell bound, but she seems to be missing the whole point. Anyway, I read the whole Bible, she never did, and I often quote scripture to her which pretty much leaves her standing in an odd place of not countering me on such matters.
Use the masters tools to bring down the masters house.
in the meantime, I am nice to her because she is 77. Shes scary tho, sometimes, because she is adamantly against Jews and Gay folks, but on the other hand, has a friend online who sends her recipes who is Jewish and gay...GO FIGURE!!!!

[ArkDem]

10. Pre Vatican Catholic??????????????????

[GreenPartyVoter]

11. Try quoting scripture. See my website for some examples

[stepnw1f]

12. People...

be a little respectful of people who are religious. Remember, this subject matter is devisive. It may even fracture the Democratic base, when many fellow suporters decide to rant about religion. Just remember to be less general and more specifically ridicule the RW Fundies, not all religios people.

[mumon]

13. Here's some good text to start out with...

http://www.catholicdoors.com/prayers/english/p01975b.htm

Then he commands the demon as follows:

I command you, unclean spirit, whoever you are, along with all your minions now attacking this servant of God, by the mysteries of the incarnation, passion, resurrection, and ascension of our Lord Jesus Christ, by the descent of the Holy Spirit, by the coming of our Lord for judgment, that you tell me by some sign your name, and the day and hour of your departure. I command you, moreover, to obey me to the letter, I who am a minister of God despite my unworthiness; nor shall you be emboldened to harm in any way this creature of God, or the bystanders, or any of their possessions.

The priest lays his hand on the head of the sick person, saying:

They shall lay their hands upon the sick and all will be well with them. May Jesus, Son of Mary, Lord and Savior of the world, through the merits and intercession of His holy apostles Peter and Paul and all His saints, show you favor and mercy.

All: Amen....

Exorcism

I cast you out, unclean spirit, along with every Satanic power of the enemy, every spectre from hell, and all your fell companions; in the name of our Lord Jesus +Christ. Begone and stay far from this creature of God.+ For it is He who commands you, He who flung you headlong from the heights of heaven into the depths of hell. It is He who commands you, He who once stilled the sea and the wind and the storm. Hearken, therefore, and tremble in fear, Satan, you enemy of the faith, you foe of the human race, you begetter of death, you robber of life, you corrupter of justice, you root of all evil and vice; seducer of men, betrayer of the nations, instigator of envy, font of avarice, fomentor of discord, author of pain and sorrow. Why, then, do you stand and resist, knowing as you must that Christ the Lord brings your plans to nothing? Fear Him, who in Isaac was offered in sacrifice, in Joseph sold into bondage, slain as the paschal lamb, crucified as man, yet triumphed over the powers of hell. (The three signs of the cross which follow are traced on the brow of the possessed person). Begone, then, in the name of the Father, + and of the Son, + and of the Holy + Spirit. Give place to the Holy Spirit by this sign of the holy + cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, who lives and reigns with the Father and the Holy Spirit, God, forever and ever.

All: Amen.