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Please read my LTTE before I send it in.

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Rainbowreflect Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-10-04 07:48 AM
Original message
Please read my LTTE before I send it in.
Any feedback is welcome. I had to write this as I am sick to death of the right telling me to shut up.

People on the right are constantly saying we must not speak against this president. It seem like they may have a serious case of amnesia. I seem to recall 8 years of continuous speaking against our president by the right. I also remember 7 plus years and over 70 million in tax dollars and all we ended up with was a blue dress.

This administration is the most dishonest and secretive administration in our history. One of the first acts in office by this president was an executive order dismantling the Presidential Records Act (although presidents cannot overturn laws with executive orders). They have lied to send our troops to kill and be killed. They have covered up the many policy payoffs to their largest contributer. They have refused to comply with court or congressional orders to release information. And this administration has leaked the name of an undercover CIA operative. A crime that would make them as George H. W. Bush said in 1999 "the most insidious of traitors".

Before you say anyone should not speak against this president or his administration remember in this country we not only have the right to speak against our government when we believe they are wrong, we have the responsibility.
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molly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-10-04 07:50 AM
Response to Original message
1. Sounds about perfect to me
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jmags Donating Member (517 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-10-04 07:52 AM
Response to Original message
2. n/t
I'm not an English major, but I'd suggest you swith the last two sentences in the second paragraph to something more like this:

This administration has even leaked the name of an undercover CIA operative - a crime that, as George H.W. Bush said, would make them "the most insidious of traitors".

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THUNDER HANDS Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-10-04 07:54 AM
Response to Original message
3. i touched it up a bit
People on the right who are constantly saying we must not speak against this president have a serious case of amnesia. I seem to recall eight years of continuous speaking against our president as well as over 70 million in wasted tax dollars for a blue dress.

This administration is the most dishonest and secretive administration in our history. They have lied to send our troops to kill and be killed. They have covered up the many policy payoffs to their largest contributer. They have refused to comply with court or congressional orders to release information. And this administration has leaked the name of an undercover CIA operative - a crime that would make them as George H. W. Bush said in 1999 "the most insidious of traitors".

Before you say anyone should not speak against this president or his administration remember in this country we not only have the right to speak against our government when we believe they are wrong, we have the responsibility.
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GOPisEvil Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-10-04 07:55 AM
Response to Original message
4. I was immediately hit with a parenthetical thought you might want to add.
This administration is the most dishonest and secretive administration in our history. (And that is saying something when you consider Richard Nixon was President of the USA for over 5 years.)
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markses Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-10-04 07:58 AM
Response to Original message
5. Check the tone
People on the right are constantly saying we must not speak against this president. It seems like they may have a serious case of amnesia. I seem to (delete "seem to" here, as it is too cute by far, sarcasm-wise) recall 8 years of continuous speaking against our president by the right. I also remember 7 plus years and over 70 million in tax dollars and all we ended up with was a blue dressvague - what is the 70 million about? We know, but other readers might not...remember your audience!!!).

This administration is the most dishonest and secretive administration in our history. One of the first acts in office by this president was an executive order dismantling the Presidential Records Act (although presidents cannot overturn laws with executive orders). They have lied to send our troops to kill and be killed. They have covered up the many policy payoffs to their largest contributer. They have refused to comply with court or congressional orders to release information. And this administration has leaked the name of an undercover CIA operative. A crime that would make them as George H. W. Bush said in 1999 "the most insidious of traitors" (SENTENCE FRAGMENT!!! Make the period after "operative" a comma).

Before you say anyone should not speak against this president or his administration remember in this country we not only have the right to speak against our government when we believe they are wrong, we have the responsibility.Wordy, plus the "you" attitude is accusatory. Possible revision: People who say we should not speak out against this president should remember this: In America, speaking out is not justb a right. It is a responsibility. (Shorter sentences and less conjunctions at the end of a piece increase intensity, as Aristotle showed).
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Rainbowreflect Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-10-04 08:31 AM
Response to Original message
6. Thanks everyone for their ideas.
Edited on Thu Jun-10-04 08:34 AM by Rainbowreflect
I have made some of your changes & some of my own. I hope my local paper will print it. The seem to print about every 3rd letter I send them and it's been a while.
on edit - I should not post or write LTTE this early in the morning.
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nostamj Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-10-04 08:37 AM
Response to Reply #6
7. perhaps this quote as a 'capper'

"Dissent is the highest form of patriotism."

- Thomas Jefferson
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Rainbowreflect Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-10-04 12:23 PM
Response to Reply #7
8. Thanks, I added that and sent it in.
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